


A Welcome Back.

by Jase



Category: Aaron Dingle - Fandom, Emmerdale, Robert Sugden/Aaron Dingle - Fandom, robert sugden - Fandom, robron
Genre: Angst, Declarations Of Love, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Marriage, Marriage Proposal, Meant To Be, Reunions, Same-Sex Marriage, Shameless Smut, Smut, Soulmates, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2018-12-15 00:59:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 84,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11795139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jase/pseuds/Jase
Summary: After learning that Rebecca has decided to keep the baby and Aaron departs to Ireland as a result, Robert goes on a downward spiral after losing what's most important to him. What will he do when he can't cope with his loss, and worse of all when he finds out it was all because of a lie?





	1. Always Crying

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place after Aaron leaves for Ireland, not being able to cope with the baby.

 

_MID AUGUST_

It’s been over a month now since Aaron left. Robert’s been keeping himself busy with work and nothing but, otherwise he has to accept his current situation. Early mornings and late nights running himself ragged with little to no sleep and even less eating. He can’t sleep, can’t eat, he finds himself heartbroken. Heartbroken and alone, all he can do is keep himself busy, as Diane and Vic nag at him every chance they get.

“Robert, you have to stop. This isn’t good for you, I can’t even remember the last time I saw you eat.” Vic nags, as she follows Robert into the porta cabin at the scrapyard. “You’re going to work yourself to death.”

“Vic, I don’t need your concern, please just leave me alone. Don’t you have anything better to do? Shouldn’t you be rolling out the red carpet for Bex somewhere?”

“Come on Robert, you know that’s not how it is and besides, at least I care, she is having your baby after all.”

“Yes, you’re right, you are the only who cares. I don’t want to talk about her or that…baby, Vic.”

He’s had enough of this, all he wants to do is work and keep his mind busy, but Vic jumps in whenever she can and brings up the baby as if it’s the only important thing around. He can’t bring himself to say aloud just how much he doesn’t care about the baby, how could he? It’s a constant reminder of what he did, what he’s lost, what he now feels like he will never get back.

“But Robert...”

“No Vic, that’s enough!” Robert yells as he finally turns and walks away, slamming the door shut behind him.

 

\---

 

As Vic walks through the door to the Pub she sees Diane and Doug waiting on her.

“Victoria, how was he? Is he coming?” Diane asks.

Vic pauses for a second and lets out a sigh. “No, I didn’t even get a chance to ask him.”

“I’m really worried about him, it’s been days since I’ve even seen him.” Diane lets out with worry.

“He’s not doing so well, he’s working himself to death. He looks like he’s lost weight and he looks paler than usual, I just don’t know what to do anymore. Last time I saw him eat, what little he actually ate before he stormed off, was a couple days ago when I got him to sit down with Rebecca to discuss the baby. Everything was going okay until we brought up baby names, I think it got too real for him at that point and everything went downhill from there. I’m trying not to bring up Rebecca or the baby to see if I can get him to open up, but it’s getting very difficult to even track him down. Nicola said he’s mostly working from home and only goes into the scrapyard once she and Jimmy are gone, staying there all hours of the night.”

“Then I guess it’s about time I get my feet in there, I may be old but I can still put up a good fight.” Diane says as she stands and makes for the door.

 

_LATE AUGUST_

Robert is looking more tired than usual, even a bit fragile and he doesn’t seem to have much fight left in him. Aaron hasn’t come back yet and Robert’s not sure if he’s going to. Every night he finds himself holding his phone scrolling over Aaron’s name and fighting the urge to call him. On a drunken night a week ago, he finally did, but all he got was his voicemail and he can’t remember what he may have said in his drunken stupor, not that it matters as he never heard back. Every day that passes that Aaron is not in his life he loses hope. After a long conversation with Diane, he reluctantly agreed to having a weekly meal with the family and to put some effort into the baby. Maybe keeping occupied with the baby will help him heal a bit.

He’s had a few conversations with Rebecca preparing for the baby, they set up a trust fund, talked about possible names, and decided on putting him as the father on the birth certificate. On a Friday morning, he meets Rebecca for breakfast, just to talk. It’s obvious the isolation is really starting to get to him as he finds himself having to talk to the one person he least wants to talk to. _What would Aaron think? It doesn’t matter, he’s not coming back, you’ll never see him again._ Robert thinks to himself.

“I’m sorry, are you even paying attention, Robert?”

“What?”

“Why bother asking me for breakfast if you’re not actually going to be here?”

“I’m sorry Bex, I just… I just…” He stammers out before Rebecca cuts him off.

“No! Look, I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but it’s time you get over it. He’s not coming back and you need to move on with your life. We have a baby on the way and we…this, you, me, the baby. We can be something”

“What the fuck are you on about? There is no us…no you and me. There never was and there never will be. You were the biggest mistake of my life!” Snaps Robert before he storms off.

Still reeling from that conversation with Rebecca, he finds himself needing a drink more than ever, but it’s been a while since he has stepped foot in the pub and he may never again. That meeting with Rebecca, it felt like a slap to the face reeling him right back to reality. It’s not quite the same as The Woolpack, but David’s Shop will have to do.

“Hiya!” David quickly chirps as Robert walks through the door. “What can I do you for?”

“I need a drink…a hard one.” Robert answers as he takes a seat at one of the tables.                

“No problem mate, what are you having?”

“Doesn’t matter, just get it fast.”

He’s been drinking for what feels like hours now and he’s not sure just how much he’s had to drink, but David’s been trying to stop him for a while now. “Mate, I think you’ve had enough. Maybe I should call Victoria to come grab you.”

“Please just one more, I’ve had a really rough week…month really.”

“Listen Robert, seriously, I think you’ve had enough. I’m calling Victoria.”

Just as David heads for the phone, Robert gets up and stumbles away. “Don’t bother, I’m out of here.”

As he stumbles about, not sure where he is or where he’s going, Robert thinks to himself that maybe David was right. Maybe he should have let him call Vic. His head is spinning or _maybe it’s the ground_ he thinks to himself. He stops for a second to try and figure out where he’s at but all he manages to do is end up on the ground. It’s dark outside and no one seems to be around so he at least gets to avoid the embarrassment of everyone gawking at him. Or so he thought.

“Robert, is that you?” The soft meek voice of Paddy suddenly grabs his attention.

“Oi. Paddy, don’t mind me, think I just had a little bit of a stumble.” He slurs.

“Robert flipping Sugden pissed and riding the ground, a sight for sore eyes.” Paddy quips.

“You need me to call Victoria for you? Diane?” He asks Robert, hating that he cares enough to even bother with him. He’s never been a fan of Robert Sugden and after everything that he’s done, he certainly would rather avoid speaking to him. Though things are very rocky right now, Aaron cares for him and would hate to see Paddy brush him off in such a state.

“No, no, I’m okay really. I just need a minute…I know you’d rather just go about your night.” Robert barely manages to get out.

Paddy sighs, already regretting what he’s doing, but he kneels and begins helping Robert up. “Come on, I’ll take you home.”

It’s a quiet night and dark by now, a light breeze lingers in the air as they walk to the Mill, Robert leaning on Paddy’s shoulder. Not many people still out, so they manage to go unnoticed and it only takes a few minutes before they find themselves at the Mill. Robert flimsily tries to unlock the door but can’t seem to even find the keyhole properly. “Here, let me.” Says Paddy as he takes the keys and unlocks the door. He keeps a hold of Robert and walks him over to the sofa and helps him down. Once he has Robert on the sofa, Paddy heads for the kitchen and pours him a cup of water, but just as he tries to hand it to Robert, things get awkward fast. Never in his life did Paddy think he would witness this, Robert Sugden crying. Tears streaming down his face, chin wobbling, sniffling… that type of crying.

 _What the hell is wrong with me, why am I crying… again?_ Robert thinks to himself.

Even as his head spins, Robert can’t help but realize that he’s been doing this a lot lately. It’s catching him of guard, just coming out of nowhere.

“Thanks Paddy…I know you hate me, so I’m sure this is the last thing you’d want to be doing right now.” Robert lets out.

“Well it’s certainly not how I pictured my night going.” Paddy returns.

Robert, trying to control his sobbing looks Paddy straight in the eyes and apologizes…for everything.

“Really Paddy, I know you hate me and with good reason. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I really am. For everything. Believe it or not, that day with the grain… I was drunk, I tend to do stupid things when I’m drunk. I only wanted to scare you. I didn’t realize how long I’d left it on. When I went back to check on you, I realized what I’d done. I was about to jump in to get you out, but I heard Andy coming around and I panicked. So I ran. I never really meant to hurt you, and Leo… Paddy I swear, I would have never hurt him. I know I’m a coward, but I would never hurt a kid. I know what you both mean to Aaron, I would never intentionally hurt you.”

Paddy takes a seat on the chair across from Robert, listening to his apology, he sees the tears streaming down his face, hears the sincerity in his voice. He may not like him very much, but he can see that Robert means every word.

“I’m not sure I can easily forgive and forget, but, I accept your apology. I can tell you meant it. I once gave Aaron a second chance because I saw the good in him, and he’s obviously had quite an impact on you, because I can see that same good in you now. You’re no longer the same man you were before. I’m willing to give you a second chance Robert, for his sake, but that one chance is all you’ll get.”

“Thank you, Paddy, that means a lot. Believe it or not, this is helping. It’s oddly making me feel like he’s near. I miss him so much. I can’t stop thinking about him, it’s all I do. I love him, I’ve never loved anyone like this.” Robert says.

Taking a deep breath, not knowing if he wants to really know, Paddy asks “So why’d you do it? If you love him as much as you say you do, why’d you do it?”

“I was hurt. That day, when I went to see him, he was off his face Paddy. He didn’t care about anything other than the drugs. He wanted nothing to do with me. I tried getting through to him, but he didn’t care about anything. He didn’t care about the appeal, he didn’t care about Liv, I couldn’t even recognize him. He told me I was of no use to him, told me that he didn’t need me. To leave him alone so he could do as many drugs as he wants. I thought we were over. I went back to the Mill and got drunk, wrecked the place and next thing I know, Rebecca was there, she said I texted her to come over, but I honestly don’t even remember doing that. She tried to sort me out, but before I knew it I’d drank the whole bottle of whiskey. I was angry and I wanted to hurt him the way he hurt me, and she was there. I knew what to say, how to make it happen, but the last thing I remember was a kiss. I must have passed out at some point because when I woke up, she was gone.”

“Wait, so you were drunk? Was she?” Paddy asks.

“She had a sip of the whiskey but no more than that.” Robert answers.

“Do you love her?” Paddy asks.

“Of course not!” Robert quickly replies.

“So, let me get this straight. You were off your rocks drunk, emotionally compromised, and trying to do something you clearly wouldn’t want to do otherwise. While she on the other hand was perfectly sober and got exactly what she wanted, what she’s been trying to get since she got here. Jesus, Robert…That sounds an awful lot like a sexual predator, some people might even consider what happened to you rape.”

That last word hits Robert, so unsure what to think of what Paddy has just said. This isn’t something that happens to men, is it? He is the one that came on to her after all.

“Don’t be daft Paddy, it was all my fault. I came on to her.”

“Look Robert, I may not be your biggest fan, but I’ve had two too many people in my life suffer through sexual assault. First Aaron, now Rhona… What happened to you may not have been like what happened to them, but dammit Robert, there is a consent issue here. You were in no state to consent to what happened. Regardless of whether you came on to her or not, you were drunk and she wasn’t. She’s been walking around all this time pretending to be a friend to you and to Aaron, as a friend and sober party, she should have had respect for you and walked away. You need to step back and consider that you are not really to blame here. If anything, you are a victim. I’ve seen how everyone’s been treating you, how she has everyone wrapped around her little finger. Have you considered that maybe this is exactly what she wanted, that maybe she’s been playing you all along?”


	2. A Quick Goodbye

 

It’s two in the morning and his head is still slightly spinning, but what Paddy said has been running through his head for a couple of hours now and he can’t stop thinking about it. _Could he be right? Has she been playing me…us…all along?_ Though he thought about waiting until morning when his thoughts are clear, the nagging at the back of his head got the best of him. Robert picks up his phone and messages Rebecca.

_Robert: Any chance you’re awake? We need to talk._

_Rebecca: Can this wait till morning?_

_Robert: No, this is important._

_Rebecca: I’ll be there in a bit._

Unsure what he’s going to say or how this will all go down, he finds himself pacing between the kitchen and living room. He stops himself for a moment to take something for the headache that is now nagging him moments before he hears a knock at the door. “Coming!” He calls out heading for the door. As she walks through the entryway, he notices the fresh makeup and perfume. It’s two in the morning but she looks like she’s ready for a night out. He’s unsure why it surprises him, she was always plotting against Chrissie after all. Yet somehow, he never expected her to play him. Does he even have the right to feel angry about it? Maybe it’s just karma for all the bad things he’s done.

“What’s wrong, Robert? What is it that you couldn’t wait till morning?” Rebecca asks as she takes a seat on the chair. “Are you ready to apologize for how you acted when we last spoke?”

“ARE YOU INSANE…ME APOLOGIZE TO YOU? AFTER WHAT YOU’VE DONE?” Robert yells back at her.

“What do you mean what I’ve done?” A look of surprise flashes through her face.

“You know, I had an interesting conversation with Paddy earlier today.” He replies.

“Strange, I didn’t know you two were so close. I thought he hated you.”

“Well, we had a bit of a heart to heart and I think we’ve patched things up, but that’s not the point. Not sure if you are aware of what else is going on in the lives of us lowly commoners down in the village, but Paddy’s ex-wife Rhona just had her husband put away for rape.” Just saying the word _rape,_ he sees how Rebecca winces at the word. Clearly something about the word bothers her.

“That’s awful, I can’t say that I’ve heard, but please pass on my condolences? Congratulations? I don’t know quite what is the right response here. Tell me though, what does that have to do with anything?”

“The thing is, I was a bit drunk and spilled my guts out to Paddy…told him everything about _that_ night and he made me realize something. This whole time I’ve been sick to my stomach over what I did, how I’ve hurt Aaron. I wanted nothing more than to own up to what I did. The last thing I wanted was for him to feel like I was making excuses. All the while you walked around acting like this victim. Like I forced you into it. It never occurred to me that maybe it was the other way around, that you took advantage of me. You knew… You knew damn well that I love Aaron, that I felt nothing for you, yet you had no problem sleeping with me in the state I was in. Bex, I was so wasted that night I don’t even remember texting you, it’s a complete black out after the kiss to me, I don’t remember anything after that. You slept with me while I was so off my head, I can’t even remember it and you know damn well that I would never have done it otherwise. Is that what you consider consent? Worst of all, you didn’t even have the decency to use protection and now you’re pregnant. Paddy called it sexual assault”

Those last words hit Rebecca fast, Robert immediately notices the panic in her eyes as she shakes in place.

“No, it wasn’t like that.” She quickly stammers out.

“Then please tell me how it was, because the more I think about it, the more I agree with Paddy. He’s encouraging me to press charges.” Robert replies sternly.

“What? Robert, please don’t do this.” she begs.

“And why not, you’ve already taken everything from me, why shouldn’t I return the favor?” He says as he sees the panic really setting in on her.

“BECAUSE NOTHING HAPPENED!” Rebecca yells before covering her mouth, tears building in her eyes.

“What do you mean? Bex, please tell me you haven’t been lying all this time?” Robert questions, as his face turns red in anger.

“Nothing happened, okay! After we kissed, you started crying… kept saying sorry before you slowly passed out. The following morning, when you apologized for what we did, when you told me you had used me, it became obvious that you thought something more happened. I was angry. You know how I feel about you. How I’ve always felt about you… and you used me. Again. Once I found out I was pregnant, I figured that if you thought it was yours, maybe you’d come around, that you’d realize that this, you and me, we make sense. I can give you what he can’t,” Rebecca confesses.

“It’s Ross’, isn’t it? I fucking knew it” He yells.

“Please Robert, just give us a chance.” Rebecca pleads.

“Are you mad?! What is wrong with you? I don’t know how else to say it but there is NO FUCKING YOU AND ME! There never will be!” Robert is furious, now pacing around the living room. He’s clearly lost it, and Rebecca can see it. She reaches for him, trying to calm him, she barely gets a hold on one of his arms when he quickly grabs her by her shoulders, shoving her back. Rebecca slips, falling on her back. Everything happened so fast, yet seems to have happened in slow motion, for a split second as she falls, Robert doesn’t see Rebecca… he sees Katie. She’s not hurt. The fall wasn’t bad, but the only thing that Robert can think of, is Katie. All the anguish, all the guilt, that he’s been holding on to, comes rushing back to him all at once. Tears are running down his face before he realizes it. Despite what she just confessed, he apologizes to her as he picks her up. “I’m sorry. I…I didn’t mean to. Listen I think it’s best you leave.” Robert says, as he walks her to the door. Before she has a chance to protest, he steers her out and closes the door.

He’s shaking now, rattled by what he just did. It may have been unintentional, but it happened no less. _What have I done?_ He thinks to himself. This isn’t him, it’s not who we wants to be. Everything has fallen apart and the only person he loves, the only person he truly feels himself with, is now gone. He needs to go, needs to leave this place. There’s nothing left for him here, other than pain.

It’s only a bit after four in the morning and even though he’s had some time to recuperate from Rebecca’s confession, Robert can’t seem to fully reel himself in. He’s spent the last two hours making a couple of calls, first to his solicitor to get some paper work started to hand over his shares of both Home James and Holey Scrap over to Nicola and Jimmy, followed by a call to Nicola to let her know that the paper work was coming. He doesn’t give her many details, but makes her aware the he is leaving and won’t be returning, she doesn’t push for more but gives him her best and wishes him luck. Finally, he rings Victoria, who’s not very happy and not fully awake, when she answers. “Rob…what is it? It’s not even five.” she says groggily.

“Vic…I need you to stop by. It’s important and it can’t wait” Robert says, his voice shaking.

Victoria notices the emotion in his voice and quickly agrees. “I’ll be there in a bit.”

As he ends their call, he rushes upstairs to the bedroom he barely got to share with Aaron, grabs some bags and starts packing. He knows that he won’t be able to take too much with him and that he’ll have to leave everything else behind. His emotions are starting to really hit him and his thoughts start running wild on what he’s not taking with him. _It’s not right to leave all my stuff here like this, it shouldn’t be here when Aaron returns. I don’t want to make things harder for him._ Lucky for him it's not long before he hears a knock at the door, he grabs his bags and heads back downstairs to let Victoria in. As he opens the door, she barges in “what is so important that you had to wake me up at four in the morning?” She grumbles as she heads to the kitchen to start a kettle. She turns to face Robert and sees the red puffiness in his eyes and knows that something is up. Whatever it is it can’t be good.

Before Victoria can ask anything further, she finally notices the bags in Robert’s hands. “Robert, what are those for? You going somewhere, taking a holiday? It’s probably a good idea, you should take a bit of time and get your head sorted. I think you can really use it.” she says as she walks towards him.

“Vic...I’m…I’m…” he stammers out.

“You’re what? For god sakes, what is it Rob?”

“Vic…I’m not coming back.” he’s finally able to get out.

Victoria is now officially worried, not just worried, but freaked out. “What do you mean you’re not coming back? Robert, what is it? What’s going on?”

“Vic, I can’t stay here. It’s too painful. Everything reminds me of him, there’s just nothing left for me here.”

“But Robert your life is here, your work is here, and so is your family. Me, Diane, Bernice, Doug, don’t we mean anything to you? You can’t just leave, Rob, not again. And what about the baby?” Victoria pleads, water in her eyes as she tries to keep herself from crying.

Those last words are the final straw for Robert, he collapses to the chair, his chin trembling before he finally breaks and tears start falling from his eyes. Victoria rushes to him and kneels in front of him, she holds his hands and pleads. “Robert, please tell me what’s happened?”

It takes him a moment to fully collect himself, but once he’s able to, he tells Victoria everything. Tells her everything about that night with Rebecca and everything that Rebecca just confessed to him hours earlier. By now, Victoria is a complete wreck. She finds herself full of guilt…full of shame. The way she’s treated Robert and sided with _her_. It was all a lie. Wiping away her tears, she begs him to stay…tries to reason with him. “Robert, it was all a lie. You never cheated on Aaron! You have to let him know!”

“I can’t Vic. Yeah, she lied about it, but I’m still to blame. She wouldn’t have been able to if I hadn’t given her the opportunity. I was trying to hurt him, and that’s exactly what I did.” Robert stops for a second to wipe the tears from his eyes and takes a deep breath, as his chin trembles, he continues. “It’s because of me that he started cutting himself again…me. He had to go to Ireland just to get away from me. I did that, and I have to live with that. He’s been gone for so long now Vic, he must be doing better. I can’t ruin that. Hurting him, it ripped my heart out and I can’t bear to do it again. I have to let him go.”

“But why do you have to go? We don’t even know if he’s coming back.” Victoria pleads.

“I don’t want to be the reason he doesn’t return to his home, and it’s not just him… I can’t see Rebecca again. I don’t know what I’ll do…I pushed her to the floor earlier Vic, when she confessed, she reached for me and I pushed her off. She slipped and hit the floor.

“Robert…”

“She wasn’t hurt, but I still pushed her, I pushed her and…then I saw her, for a moment, I saw her.”

“You saw who?” Victoria asks.

“Katie. It was like Katie all over again.” Says Robert, his breathing becoming erratic. He looks like he’s on the verge of a nervous breakdown. “I’m not myself anymore, nothing feels right.”

“What do you mean? What does Katie have to do with any of this?” Victoria asks, confused.

“Doesn’t matter, Vic. I have to leave this place.”

Victoria can see the pain in his eyes, she knows there isn’t much she can do, that he’s made up his mind, but she can’t help it. She’s already lost Andy, she can’t lose Robert as well, not again. Tears streaming down her face, she begs him one last time to stay, to work things out with Aaron, but she can see it’s pointless. She finally tries to calm her breathing as she looks into his eyes, taking a mental picture of him, not knowing if she will ever see him again. He brushes the hair away from her face and goes in for a hug, gently squeezing her he says “I’ll find him Vic, I promise you, I’ll find him. Make sure he comes back home.”

“Andy? How?” She asks.

“I’m not sure, but I promise you, I’ll make sure he comes back. Just promise me that you won’t tell anyone what I told you. Don’t tell anyone I’ve left, if they ask, just tell them I’m taking some time away.”

“But Robert…” She starts.

“Vic, please. When you get a chance, do you think you can come back and move my stuff out? You can put it away or throw it out or whatever, but it shouldn’t be here when he returns to his home.” Robert says with a pained look on his face, this has to be killing him.

She can no longer control her sobbing, she leans into Roberts chest and simply nods in agreement.

“And Vic, please look after yourself and Diane.” His final request.

They hug in silence for a bit longer and say their goodbyes. Victoria tries to stay longer, to help him get sorted, but Robert knows that the longer she’s there, the more chance there are that he won’t be able to leave. He finally leads her to the door, gives her one last hug and sends her on her way. She doesn’t get very far when she hears him call back out to her. “Vic! Wait up.” She can’t help it, but her hopes are high for a second before he crashes them right back down. “Can you please hold on to this?” says Robert, as he hands her his cell phone. “There’s too many pictures, memories, in there. I can’t just throw it away and I can’t hold on to it. I don’t think I can resist calling him or answering if he calls me. I need to cut all ties.”

“But how will I be able to reach you?” Victoria asks.

“You won’t. I’ll try to reach out when I can.” He answers as he turns and heads back in, saying one final goodbye.


	3. How's Robert?

 

_LATE SEPTEMBER_

It’s been a bit crazy at the pub lately and tonight is no exception. Nearly all the tables are occupied and same goes for the bar. Pete and Leyla are throwing an engagement party and Leyla doesn’t know the meaning of the words “low key”. It really should be all “hands-on” deck and Victoria should be in the kitchen helping Marlon out, but instead she finds herself manning the bar and pouring pints as Faith nags Charity to get off her lazy bum and help, which leads to neither of them doing any work.

As she pours a new pint for Pete, she can’t help but notice the nerves on his face. Poor guy looks like he doesn’t know what he’s gotten himself into. Leyla, on the other hand looks to be on cloud nine, you can practically see the wedding bells over her head and hearts in her eyes. For a second, she pauses, thinking of Adam, of happier times, of how things could be if he hadn’t been so stupid. Her thoughts of Adam are about to drag her down further, but she’s quickly pulled back by a familiar voice. “Did you miss me luv?” Chas whispers in her ear.

“Chas!” Victoria squeals with joy. “Thank God you’re back, maybe you can lend us a hand back here? And by us, I mean me because as you can clearly see, Faith and Charity are doing absolutely nothing.” She frowns in their directions.

“Well, I did just get in, but you look like you can use a hand.” She replies.

As things calm down they catch up, Victoria asks question after question about their time in Ireland. Most of it trivial, not wanting to seem like she only cared about her final question. “How’s Aaron? Did he come back with you?” She finally asks.

“He’s good. The time away did him well, he was able to get himself sorted, mostly. He started doing weekly counseling instead of waiting till things were about to spill. Plus, you know, Liv really knows how to keep him occupied.” Says Chas as she pours herself a pint.

“That’s great, Chas. I’m glad he’s doing so much better.” Vic lets out before Chas cuts her off.

“No thanks to that brother of yours.”

Victoria frowns, upset by the comment. “That’s not fair.”

Chas takes a drink of her pint before replying. “Look, I just got in and I don’t want to fight, specially over him. The trip really took it out of me, so I think I’m going to go and take a rest.”

“Yeah, you do that, take a good nap and welcome back.” Vic hugs her, before Chas steps into the back.

Luckily, it’s not until after Chas departs that Diane walks in, Doug in tow, Victoria is not sure if she can handle keeping the secret if something starts off between them. Chas bad mouthing Robert and Diane defending him. Diane, per usual, asks about Robert. She wants to know if Victoria has heard from him, when he’s coming home. Unfortunately, much to her own aggravation, Victoria hasn’t heard from Robert, not since that night. Not just Robert, either but, Rebecca also seems to have disappeared that same night. It’s killing her hiding this secret and killing her even more not knowing where Robert is. How he is doing. If he’s ever coming home. Upset by the lack of information from Victoria, Diane and Doug make their retreat, asking Victoria to please keep them updated on Robert. She agrees, though, not knowing when or if she’ll even hear from him.

Trying to keep thoughts of Robert out of her mind, she cleans about the bar and then notices the crowd has died down quite a bit now that the party is over. Leyla has gone off with Priya and Vanessa for a girl’s night out, while Pete, Ross, and Finn stayed behind for a few more drinks. Ross running off his mouth about something, he seems to be trying to talk Pete out of what he’s doing. Getting married. Last time he tried that, things didn’t go so well. Finn counters that if Leyla makes him happy he should go for it. Though Pete agrees with Finn, he still seems unsure.

“Hiya, Vic.” Another familiar voice calls out.

“Aaron!” Victoria rushes, over for a hug.

“Take it easy, you know I don’t like hugs.” Aaron laughs.

She steps back and realizes how good he looks. He’s looking so much better than the last time she saw him. He seems a bit lighter, like he’s had a load off his shoulders. He goes around the bar and takes a stool in front of Victoria and asks her for a pint. They start catching up on what Aaron’s been up to at first. Victoria asking about his counseling. He lets her know that they are helping a lot, seeing a counselor regularly instead of occasionally has really helped him cope properly with his feelings. His feelings about Robert, about Rebecca, about the baby. He realizes that he should have done this long ago. He has spoken to Adam a couple of times while he was gone, but trying to keep the small talk going, Aaron asks Victoria about him and the scrapyard. He knows what he really wants to ask, but he’s trying to work himself up to it.

Victoria can see the look in his eyes, she knows what’s coming and remembers the promise she made to Robert, so she starts steering the conversation away to anything that won’t tie back to him and its taking everything she has, to do so. All she wants to do is tell Aaron. Tell him everything. She wants nothing more than for her brother to get his husband back…to be happy. She doesn’t even realize that she’s just rambling now.

“Vic! Take it easy, slow down. I barely made any of that out.” He stops her.

She sees the desperate look in his eyes and knows it’s coming.

“How’s Robert? I tried calling him a couple of times this past week, to let him know we were coming back and Liv’s been asking about him. I haven’t had any luck though, haven’t been able to reach him.”

Nervously clenching her fists, hoping she won’t break her promise to Robert, Victoria pauses for a second before answering. “He’s away right now. Took a holiday. He needed to get his head on straight.”

“Ha! Well that sounds about right, no? Getting his head on straight.” Ross barks out.

“What’s he on about?” Aaron asks, nodding his head towards Ross.

“Oh, so he doesn’t know, does he?” Ross, now grinning, stands up and walks towards the bar.

“Come on now, Ross, leave it. Let’s just get out of here.” Finn protests.

“Yeah, why don’t you do one and get out!” Victoria sneers at Ross.

“What, and miss out on seeing the look on his little face when he finds out lover boy ran off with his baby momma?” Ross laughs out.

“Please tell me he’s just full of it, Vic.” Aaron pleads.

She may be small, but you still wouldn’t want to get on her bad side. Victoria is quickly around the bar and ready to attack. “You miserable little scrote, you have no idea what you’re talking about!”

“Oh, come on, it’s a small village. Word gets around. Everyone knows that those two up and left last month and no one’s heard from them since. It’s pretty obvious, if you ask me. They’re off somewhere, making a go at being a proper little family.” Ross says grinning.

“Vic, is it true?” Aaron asks, water in his eyes.

“No! Of course not.” She quickly replies.

“Vic, I can take it. Just please tell me the truth.” Aaron asks, as he wipes tears from his face.

Victoria doesn’t realize it, but she also has tears streaming down her face. “No Aaron, I promise you that’s not how it is.”

“Then tell me how it is! Why won’t he return my calls? What are you trying to hide for him?”

“I…I…I can’t tell you Aaron, I’m sorry.”

Aaron’s had enough of all the lies. It’s always lies when it comes to Robert. He storms off, as Victoria tries to stop him, but he doesn’t get far. He finds himself in the back, his old home, pacing about to collect himself. He knows it will eat at him, he needs to know, and he’s not leaving until he has answers. He turns and heads back for the pub, but stops right before going in, when he hears _her_ voice.

“Vic, can I please talk to you…In private?” Rebecca asks, meekly. By the look on Victoria’s face when they locked eyes, she’s certain Robert has exposed her. Exposed her for who she truly is.

“You! You dare show your face, here? You, pathetic, low life, manipulative cow!” Victoria is furious, face turning red.

“Well, looks like things just got even more interesting.” Ross chimes in.

“Vic, please. I just want to talk, I need to know where he is. I need to apologize. I need to try and make things right.” Rebecca says with tears in her eyes.

“No! You get out of my sight, and you do it now, before I go over there and throw you out!” She makes for Rebecca and Finn has to step in between. “Take it easy Vic.” Says Finn, holding onto Victoria.

“Vic, please, I need…” Rebecca starts, but is quickly cut off by Victoria.

“You think I care! You?! Because of you, I turned my back on my own brother when he needed me the most. I watched him fall apart, watched him destroy himself, said such awful things to him, defending you. You ruined his life, took away what he loved most, and for what? Did you think that once you got Aaron out of the way, he would suddenly fall for you? You knew...You knew damn well that he felt nothing for you, he still doesn’t, he never will. But from the moment you got here, you took every chance you could to drive a wedge between them. You must have thought yourself so lucky when you found him in that state, you thought you were going to get exactly what you wanted. Fortunately for Robert, he passed out while you were trying it on with him. He passed out before you had the chance to sleep with him. How could you do this? How could you lie to him about the whole thing? Making him think that he’s the father, when the baby’s father is right there!” She finishes, pointing straight at Ross.

“What?” Ross mumbles in shock.

“Oh what, not so funny now, huh?” Victoria says smirking at Ross.

As she finally catches her breath, she realizes she’s just broken the one promise she made to Robert. She knows what she’s done, but she doesn’t regret it for a second. As she looks back at Rebecca, she sees the scared look in her face, her mouth opened in surprise, right before she turns and runs out. Victoria realizes that Rebecca had been looking past her and turns to see Aaron standing behind her with shock on his face, tears falling from his eyes.

After that last scene Victoria decides it's best to close down the pub, she rings the bell and sends the few people left, packing, she runs back to the kitchen and tells Marlon to go. Luckily for her, both Faith and Charity ran off earlier to do who knows what, so she doesn’t have to make some excuse to close the place down. She needs to talk to Aaron, she needs to tell him everything. He deserves to know.

“Is it true, Vic? Did she make all of it up?” Aaron asks.

Suddenly it all hits her and Victoria breaks down, sobbing uncontrollably. All she could do was nod yes.

“When is he coming back? I need to speak to him” he asks.

Victoria wipes the tears from her eyes and replies. “I don’t think he’s coming back, Aaron.”

“What do you mean, he’s not coming back? Aaron begins to panic.

“He’s broken, Aaron. After you left, he just fell apart. He tried so hard to keep it together and just threw himself into work. That’s all he did. He couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep and once he figured you probably weren’t coming back, he just gave up, but Diane and I convinced him to focus on the baby. Maybe if he focused on the baby, he might be able to move on. We nagged at him until he gave in and tried to, but all he could think of when the baby came up, was how he let you down. Then last month, Paddy had a chat with Robert, made him realize that maybe Rebecca had been playing him all along and when he spoke to Rebecca, they got into a big argument and she freaked out when he told her about his chat with Paddy. She got scared, and she confessed it all. He was so mad he pushed her. He didn’t mean to and she wasn’t hurt, but it really rattled him. He kept going on about Katie, but he wasn’t making any sense. Between her confession and what he’d done, it broke him, Aaron. He couldn’t stay, he said he had to go, that there was nothing left for him here.”

“So, you’ve known all of this, all this time? Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t he?” Aaron asks, aggravation filling his voice.

“He still felt responsible for everything. He knew how far you’d come, how well you were doing and then you started hurting yourself, because of him. He felt like all he ever did was hurt you and after everything that’s happened, he decided that letting you go would be the best thing for you. For your health. I begged him to stay, to tell you everything, but all he could think of was you. First I lost Andy and now I’ve lost Robert as well.” Victoria finally collapses into Aaron’s arms, sobbing.

“Vic, I need to see him, talk to him. Where is he?”

“I don’t know where he is, Aaron.”

“Vic, please don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not lying. I really don’t know where he is. He didn’t even know where he was going. He said he was going to try and find Andy, to bring him home.”

“Why won’t he answer my calls? You need to call him, get him to come back.” He pleads.

“That won’t work, Aaron.”

“Why?”

“He left his phone behind. He didn’t think he had the will to keep himself from calling you, or answering if you called.” Victoria says with regret.

His emotions finally get the best of him and he slams his fist down on the bar. “FUCK!”


	4. All I Ever Wanted

 

_OCTOBER_

 

Aaron sits just outside the café at a table, his eyes glued to his phone. It seems it’s all he’s been doing since he got back, since he found out Rebecca lied about everything. He spends his time refreshing Robert’s social media and work email, hoping to find something…some sign of where he is, or someway to contact him, but as usual he strikes out. No luck. “Shit.” He says to himself.

“What was that, Luv?” Chas asks, as she steps out of the café. She sits across from Aaron and hands him his drink “Here you go.”

He grabs the coffee, but barely looks up. “Any luck?” Chas asks, as she finally grabs his attention. Looking up from his phone, he sees the hopeful look in her eyes and just nods his head. She purses her lips and offers an apology. “I’m sorry luv, maybe you should take a break for now and enjoy your coffee.”

He gives her a half-hearted smile and nods. As he takes a deep breath, he takes a moment to look around and notices the cool breeze in the air. Just the way he likes it…the way Robert likes it, as that thought crosses his mind, he feels the ache in his heart. It’s been there for weeks, longer even. It’s been there since he left for Ireland, only now that he knows the truth, it’s much worse.

Even though he felt like it was the right thing to do at the time, still does, he regrets leaving the way he did. He regrets the things he said to Robert. He needed to get away, needed to sort himself out, things had gotten so out of hand that he started cutting himself again. He threatened a pregnant woman. Worst of all he had physically attacked Robert.

“I know that look on your face luv.” Chas says, dragging him back to reality, away from his thoughts. “You can’t beat yourself up Aaron, none of this is your fault.”

“Isn’t it though?” He objects.

“Of course, it’s not.”

“I can’t help it. The more I think about it, the more I feel like it is. I mean…we were happy, mum. We really were, but I let that nagging voice in my head and everyone else’s stupid opinions get to me. I let my stupid jealousy mess things up. No matter how much he told me he loved me and how many times he proved it, I just couldn’t let it go.”

“But Aaron...”

“Seriously. Me last birthday says it all. He went through all that trouble, put so much effort into that surprise, and that’s not who he is, but he did it for me. He surprised me with an amazing gift and I basically turned around and spit it right back in his face. If I had just let it go, we could have gone to Vegas, we would’ve gotten married and none of this would’ve happened.”

Chas takes his hands trying to reassure him. “That’s not fair to you luv, you know, now more than ever, that manipulative cow wanted him. She would have swayed him one way or another.”

“You still don’t get it, do you? You all just expect the worst of him. Maybe that’s the reason why he was who he was, because he never had someone in his corner supporting him. I have you, Cain, Paddy, uncle Zak, Adam…I have so many people always there for me when I need them, but he’s always had no one, and still, somehow he’s the most amazing man I know. You all just don’t see it. I just wish that for once you could see him through my eyes. See him for who he really is...That day, of the crash…you remember?”

“How could I forget?” She replies.

“That day…I didn’t know it at the time, but he was trying to propose to me, kept trying to make it perfect and all I did was mess it up. I kept at him about his past, about Chrissie, about Rebecca and we started arguing but he finally opened up to me, like really opened up. He told me things he’d never told anyone else. I saw this other side of him that I didn’t even know was there. Then the crash happened and when we were under, he was calm, he tried to keep me calm as well, but when I realized I was trapped, I panicked. He tried getting me out, but he couldn’t get the steering column to budge and the car was almost full of water, so I told him I loved him, that he wasn’t going to die for me. I told him to leave and he refused. He wouldn’t leave me, mum. I could see it in his eyes, he was prepared to die there with me. The last thing I remember was Robert giving me his last breath before I passed out.”

Before Aaron can continue, a loud buzz catches their attention. They both look down at the table and see Aaron’s phone light up…an incoming call. He quickly reaches for it and answers.

“Oi, took you long enough. What do you mean? So dead end huh? Anything else you can follow up on? I don’t care how much, just find him.” Defeated, he ends the call and his shoulders slump. Clearly not the news he was hoping for.

“So, what was that all about?” Chas asks.

“I hired a private investigator to track him down…Liv’s idea.” He replies.

“Luv, I know what he means to you, but I don’t think he’s coming back and I know you don’t want to hear this, but maybe it’s time you got on with your life. It might hurt now, but you’ll heal and when you’re ready, you might meet someone…”

“You really don’t get it, do you? Mum, he’s _the one_ for me. There’s no one else, never will be, he’s all I want.” Aaron quickly cuts her off.

“Oh, Aaron. I get it, I really do, I just hate seeing you like this. If he really is _the one_ for you, then don’t give up. Do whatever you have to do to bring him back home. I’ll do whatever I can to help.” Chas replies as she comes around for a hug.

 

 

_MID OCTOBER_

It’s been a couple of weeks since Aaron last heard from the private investigator and every day that passes by, he loses hope that anything will turn up. He’s come close to giving up, but can’t seem to bring himself to do so. On a Saturday night, Aaron begrudgingly agrees to tea with Liv and Paddy. Paddy has been trying to keep Aaron’s spirits up. He knows that he wasn’t able to really be there for Aaron when Gordon came around, so he knows that he really needs to be there for him now, when he needs it the most.

“So, have you heard from your investigator lately?” Paddy asks, half regretting the question as he can clearly see the change in Aaron’s mood, half not regretting it as he finds himself worried for Robert as well.

It’s very obvious that Aaron’s mood has shifted. The sadness in his eyes clear as daylight. He shakes his head to signal a resounding no. He’s about to speak when Victoria bursts in through the door. It’s her day off so she must have something important enough that she would barge in like this.

“He thinks he may have found him!” She screams towards Aaron.

“Who’s found who now?” Liv asks with a puzzled look on her face.

“I got this today, it’s from Robert. He thinks he’s found Andy!” Victoria announces as she hands the letter over to Aaron.

 

_Vic,_

_I’m sorry for the way I left, and I’m sorry for what I made you promise. I know it’s going to be hard for you to hold it all in. You, being you and all, but it really is for the best. I just don’t want to cause him any more pain. And sorry for not having written until now, but it’s been hard trying to track him down. He didn’t leave much to follow up on._

_Anyway, I wanted to let you know that I think I found him. I’m not a hundred percent sure yet, but I may have found him. I’ll know for sure soon enough, if he keeps to where he’s been lately that is. I’m not sure of when I’ll be able to write you next, but hopefully it’ll be soon. Wish me luck._

_Give my love to Diane._

_Love you sis,_

_Robert_

 

Aaron reads the letter over twice, hoping to find some clue to where Robert might be. No luck.

“Did the envelope have a return address? Anything that could tell us where he is?” Aaron asks.

“Sorry.” She purses her lips. “No luck, but maybe your investigator could track the postage? Find out where it was sent from?” Victoria suggests.

Feeling deflated as they couldn’t get any more information from the letter, he still feels a bit of hope thanks to Victoria’s suggestion. Maybe the investigator can turn something up from the postage. Once done, Victoria makes her way to Diane’s to let her know. “Well, it must be a good sign if he’s reaching out. We haven’t heard anything from him since he left, so this is a good change. We need to stay positive.” Says Paddy, trying to encourage Aaron.

“Well, you’ve changed your tune. I thought you hated him.” Aaron teases.

“Didn’t I tell you? We sort of patched things up while you were away. He’s kind of a funny guy…specially when he’s drunk. He can certainly play a mean air guitar.” Paddy laughs out.

“What?” Aaron asks, brows twisting in confusion.

“Never mind, hopefully you get to see it one day.”  Paddy adds, as he takes a drink.

Once they finish up, they say their goodnights and head out. Paddy makes his way to Rhona’s, something he’s been doing a lot of lately. Both Marlon and Vanessa are certain they are getting back together and Aaron agrees, but Paddy claims it’s not the case. Either way they both look happier than they have been a while. A small smile tugs at Aaron’s lips as he thinks about it, _at least Paddy is getting his life back together._ Liv gently nudges her elbow against his, pulling him back from his thoughts.

“We’ll find him. I know we will.” Liv says, trying to lift his spirits.

“I hope so. I can’t leave things the way they are. I have to tell him what an idiot I was and hope that he still wants me. I need him, Liv.”

“Getting soft aren’t you.” She jokes at first. “Don’t worry, of course he still wants you.” She gently shoves back at him, before she continues. “You know, when you were in prison and it was just Rob and me, I could see how much he missed you. I saw how hard it was on him. He didn’t think we could see it, that he was hiding it well, but he was a mess. You know he acts all tough, like nothing phases him, but he couldn’t even sleep in your bed. He slept on the couch every night for weeks. Vic caught him once trying to hide the comforter in the kitchen…I miss him.” She finally lets out, wiping tears from her eyes, trying to hide them.

“Who’s the one getting soft now?” Aaron laughs.

“I swear, if you tell him I said that.” Liv threatens.

As they make it to their front door at the Mill, they both notice an envelope sitting at the bottom. An envelope that looks just like the one Vic got. It has Aaron’s name written on it, he recognizes the handwriting immediately. It’s the handwriting he always mocked Robert for, how proper and fancy it looked. Aaron picks it up and opens it just as quickly as he picked it up. He pulls Liv into a hug with one arm as he holds the letter in his other hand, and begins to read it.

 

 

_Aaron,_

_I’m not even sure where to begin, I’m not even sure if you’ll read this, if you’ll even receive it. In any case, I thought it best to give you some time before I wrote you. I truly hope you find yourself in a better place than when you left. Believe it or not, that’s all I want._

_I know I messed up and that I don’t deserve to be happy after everything I’ve done, all the people I’ve hurt, but the truth is, I can’t help it. I still love you. I always will. It’s because of you that I accepted who I am, why I stopped fighting it. It's because of you that I finally started truly living my life and I just hate that I wasted so much time denying it, denying what I felt for you. Had I accepted it back that day at the barn, when you first told me you loved me, maybe things would have been so different. Maybe I would have had it all for more than two minutes. I know you’ll go on to do great things, you just need to have faith in yourself. You’re the strongest person I know, never doubt that._

_I just hope that one day you can look back and not hate me. I just want you to be happy, Aaron. That’s all I’ve ever wanted._

_Please tell Liv I miss her and make sure that she knows that none of this is her fault._

_Love,_

_Robert_

Aaron reads the letter over for what feels like an eternity before he fully wraps both his arms around Liv and hugs her deeply before breaking down in tears.


	5. I'll Go To Him

 

_NOVEMBER_

 

It’s only the first week of November and all the Christmas decorations are already out. The cold weather and deco certainly has everyone in a festive mood. Everyone except Aaron, who finds himself on a stool at the pub, sulking. The moody music playing in the background isn’t helping. Paddy sits near the back at a table with Rhona and Leo, having a few drinks. They laugh over something that Pearl did at work, not quite catching exactly what it was, Aaron just rolls his eyes. He’s glad that Paddy is happy and that he’s officially seeing Rhona again, he deserves to be happy, they both do, but seeing other people being happy just seems to irritate him right now. It reminds him of how miserable he is. After several attempts to cheer him up and failing miserably, Chas gives up. Faith steps in to give it a go, though she’s not quite as sensitive as Chas. “Listen my boy, I know you’re down, but there’s no reason for you to bring down everyone else with you.” She says, before Debbie throws a rag at her and yells, “Oi, leave him alone! You’re supposed to be over there helping Sarah.”

“Don’t listen to her, you sulk as much if you want to. If I wasn’t working, I’d be sitting right there next to you.” Says Victoria, as she places a burger in front of Aaron.

“Ugh, you two are such downers. If you are so lonely and down why don’t you do us all a favor and just take Adam back.” Chas teases Victoria.

“Well, if he would only make a move I might do just that.”

“Wait, so you think after all these months of you giving him the cold shoulder, he’s just going to make a move on you?” Aaron finally snaps out of his mood.

“Maybe you can drop him a hint for me?” Victoria places her head on Aaron’s shoulder as she comes around the bar and gives him a sad, pleading look.

“Are you kidding me? What on earth makes you think those puppy eyes are going to work on me?” Aaron chuckles.

“See Chas, that’s how it’s done.” Victoria smirks at Chas, right before poking at Aaron’s side, tickling him.

Aaron nearly falls off his stool as he laughs, catching his foot he backs away from Victoria trying to avoid the pokes. Before he knows it, he’s backed up into someone standing behind him. “Sorry, mate.” Aaron quickly says, before noticing Victoria’s jaw hanging.

“Dad!” Sarah screams, as she rushes past Aaron.

“Andy!” Victoria finally shrieks out.

“Hiya Kiddo!” Andy says, walking past Aaron, as he picks Sarah up into a hug, squeezing her with one arm while pulling Victoria into the hug with the other.

“Dad, I’ve missed you so much!” Sarah cries into Andy’s shoulder.

Victoria gently pushes herself away from Andy, still in shock. “Andy! I can’t believe you’re actually here.” She says with tears in her eyes.

It only takes a few minutes for word to spread that Andy has arrived and while Debbie goes in for a hug, welcoming him home, Bernice rushes through the door with Diane and Doug in tow. “Andy!” Bernice shouts as she wraps her arms round him, adding “I knew Robert would find you!”

Diane follows Bernice hugging Andy. “Oh, my dear boy, I’m so glad you’re home.”

The pub is now in a state, as Andy finds himself being crowded by family and friends, as he’s welcomed home. Within half an hour of his arrival, half the village has stopped by to welcome him back. All the while, Aaron stands back, still in shock, frantically looking around. He’s glad that Andy’s home, but deep down there is only one thing on his mind. That ache in his heart that’s been there for months, pulsing, hoping for a sign. He suddenly feels a nudge on his back. He turns to see Chas slightly smiling at him. “Go ask him.” She says, pushing him towards Andy.

Before he can say anything, he hears Victoria break through the others welcoming Andy back. “Where’s Robert? Is he on his way?” Just like that, Andy’s smile slowly fades, as he shakes his head. “He’s not coming.” He gently says. Diane quickly jumps back. “What do you mean he’s not coming?”

“Guys, I’m sorry, but he’s not coming back.”

The atmosphere has suddenly changed, from the joyous excitement that radiated off of everyone just a minute ago, to a somber one. Feeling that this is clearly a family matter, the crowd starts to back off and Chas suggests they move into the back to continue this conversation. Andy gently ruffles Sarah’s head and tells her he’ll stop by later to see her and Jack. He heads to the back with Victoria, Diane, Bernice, Doug, Aaron, and Chas. As they step into the living room, Chas closes the door behind her. Not able to hold it in any longer, Aaron finally speaks up. “Andy, please, where is he?”

“I’m sorry Aaron, but he’s not coming back.”  Andy replies.

“But this is his home. Andy, you have to talk some sense into him. Make him understand that he needs to come home.” Diane pleads.

Aaron, at a loss for words, stands by listening. Unsure what to do, what to say. Fearing that he may never see Robert again.

“Look guys, I get it. I know you all want him home, so do I. I tried, believe me I tried, but he refused. It’s this place, it’s too painful for him.”

“That’s fine, I’ll go to him. Just tell me where he is.” Says Aaron.

“I’m afraid I can’t let you see him, Aaron. I know you care for him, but he was an absolute mess when he found me. He’s doing better now and I can’t let him go back to that.” Andy protests.

“But…” Aaron barely lets out before Andy cuts him off.

“No, Aaron. I really am sorry but it’s not going to happen. You of all people know what it’s like to be in such a bad place and that’s considering you have Chas, Paddy, and your family supporting you. He’s never really had anyone.”

“That’s not true, he has us, he’s always had us, Andy.” Victoria adds.

“Has he? Has he really? We have all turned our backs on him, all it took was him arguing with us about something. Anytime he fought us on something we all just treated him like he was crazy and overreacting. We never bothered to at least meet him halfway, to figure out why he felt the way he felt. And Dad…don’t even get me started on Dad.” Andy lets out, trying to make them all understand.

“Jack was nothing but good to him. Sure, they didn’t always see eye to eye, but Jack loved him.” Diane adds, slightly offended.

“You don’t even know what you’re on about.” Aaron sneers out. Fists clenched, nails digging into his palms. This is something he’s been holding onto for a while now, an anger he couldn’t let go. After Robert confessed what his dad had done to him as a kid, Aaron felt the same sting, the same pain, that Robert felt whenever anyone told him that Jack would be proud of him. Robert’s pain was now his, and it tore at his heart to see the hurt in Robert’s eyes when his father was brought up.

Diane turns to Aaron, confusion in her eyes. “Now I know I wasn’t always there, but when I came into this family I could tell that Jack had nothing but love for his children. I know he’d be proud of everything that Robert has accomplished, of the man he has become.” And there it is again, hitting Aaron like a slap to the face. “None of you really know him, do you? What he’s been through?” Aaron yells, anger rolling off his face. Diane takes offense, she knows that she hasn’t always been part of the family, but she always took pride in being a mother to all her kids. Biological or not. She’s about to object to Aaron when Andy stops her.

“No, Diane…Aaron’s right. I don’t think Dad ever told you, and Vic, you may have been too young to remember that accident Rob had when he was fifteen. The one Dad never let Rob talk about, he had a broken wrist and fractured jaw. I didn’t know back then…didn’t know until Rob told me a couple of weeks ago but, it wasn’t an accident. It was Dad, he did that to him. He caught Rob with another lad, a farmhand, he sacked the farmhand and beat the crap out of Rob. Dad shamed him for it, wouldn’t speak to him for weeks, made him hide who he was because he couldn’t stomach it. I think after that day, Dad really shunned him, that’s why Rob always felt like I replaced him, I didn’t see it then, but I do now. He felt that way because that’s exactly what Dad did, he certainly cemented it the day we had the accident, when Max died. You guys think Rob ran off, but he didn’t, Dad made him, he told him to leave and never come back. He acted like it was to keep him out of trouble, but since he found out about Rob, he couldn’t wait to get rid of him.” Andy laments.

“All this time…how could he keep something like that to himself?” Victoria says, tears in her eyes.

“If Dad, couldn’t love him for who he was, how could anyone else? So, he’s never felt like he’s good enough, still doesn’t. It’s why he pushes people away.” Andy adds.

Andy is back home, tonight should be exciting and about celebrating, but everything that Andy has just told them has them all feeling quite the opposite. They all try to recollect themselves, as Andy continues.

“I know its hard to hear this, it certainly was for me when Rob told me, but he wanted me to tell you all that he loves you guys and that he’s going to be okay. Also, please don’t be mad, but I’m only here for the night. I had to stop by to see you guys then I’m going to go spend some time with Jack and Sarah, before I head back out.”

“What do you mean head out?” Asks Victoria

“I’m going back to see Robert, help him get sorted. I’ll be gone a couple of weeks, but I promise I’ll be back. I owe it to him.”  Says Andy.

Aaron’s been at a loss for words, he needs to see Robert, needs to talk to him, but Andy is not budging. He understands where Andy is coming, what he is trying to do for his brother and part of him respects it, but the more Andy refuses him, the closer he gets to losing it. He clenches his fists, trying to keep his cool, what can he do or say to reach Andy, to make him understand. Aaron’s been too concerned with trying to reach Andy, to reason with him, that he hasn’t noticed the missed calls from Liv or the text telling him to answer. _Dammit Liv, not good timing_. He thinks to himself before she’s ringing again. “This better be important, Liv.”


	6. But I'd Be Happiest With You

 

 

Robert made Andy tell everyone he wasn’t there, that he wasn’t coming back and luckily, it’s a cold night out which is keeping people indoors. The streets are mostly empty and the glow of the street lamps are low enough that sneaking around isn’t too difficult. They parked just a bit outside the village so they wouldn’t be noticed as everyone knew Robert’s car. Sneaking through the entire village wasn’t something he was really looking forward to, but luckily, he had taken one of Aaron’s hoodies with him. It was Robert’s favorite, a black hoodie with a patterned print that starts at the chest up, part of him felt bad for taking it, but deep down he didn’t. It reminded him of Aaron, smelled of him. Now he finds himself wearing it, hood over his head, hands in pockets, as he sneaks about. He’s almost clear, he can see the Mill in the distance, he stops for a second near David’s Shop waiting for Andy to let him know he’s clear. It doesn’t take long before he gets a text from Andy, letting him know Aaron is there with him, the coast is clear. As he makes for the Mill he notices Laurel is about, but it looks like she’s having a go at Emma. Must be quite the argument, he can ear Laurel yelling something about a bridge. Nowhere near interesting enough to grab his attention. He sneaks by quickly, hoping they didn’t even notice him as he heads for the Mill.

He hasn’t been gone too long, but having it in sight still seems surreal. This could have been his home, his home with Aaron, with Liv. His family. Deep down he still wishes it could be, but that was all ruined by _her._ He hasn’t heard from her since the night she confessed to what she’d done. Paddy informed him that she did show back up once, tried talking to Victoria, but was quickly outed as the liar she was. _That’s my sis_ he thinks to himself. He’d had a couple of conversations with Paddy since he left, oddly enough, Paddy had been the only person he kept in contact with. Made him promise not to tell anyone. Part of him still doesn’t believe that he’s formed a relationship with him, he can clearly see how Aaron thinks of him as a father. He knows that even if he never sees Paddy again, he’ll still keep in touch, having that father like figure has helped him these past couple of months. Not just because Paddy feels more like a father to him than Jack ever did, but also because speaking with Paddy makes him feel near Aaron. He may never come back, may never see him again, but he’ll never be able to let him go and this will have to suffice.

As he reaches the front door to the Mill, he pulls out an envelope and places it by the door and takes a few steps back to get one final look at the Mill. He needs to take a mental picture, to always remember it, before leaving it for good.

“Still being dodgy I see…so, were you just going to sneak about without saying goodbye?” Liv says lowly as she creeps up behind Robert.

“Still being snarky and pulling off that reaper look, I see. Robert jokes back, just before Liv throws herself at him for a hug. They’ve always tried to hide it but it’s very clear that they care for each other deeply. They are more alike than they care to admit, more alike than even her and Aaron.

“I’ve missed you.” She says, as she presses her face to his chest.

“You have no idea.” Says Robert squeezing her gently before asking. “How have you been?”

“How have I been… How have _you_ been? You look awful.” She says as she steps back looking at him.

“Ouch. Tell me like it is, why don’t you?” He sighs for a second before continuing. “I’ve had better days. I’d like to say that tracking Andy down wore me out, because I don’t want to look too pitiful but, I doubt anyone would believe that.” Liv chuckles in agreement.

“So, your Brother…you found him?”

“Yeah, I promised Vic I’d bring him home.” He closes his eyes and exhales before he continues. “I’m heading back out in a bit I just needed to leave this before I left.”

“So, you are leaving then? And you weren’t even going to say goodbye?” She says, water in her eyes.

“I’m sorry Liv. I just…I don’t think I could handle seeing him. If I did see him I don’t think I could walk away.”

“So, don’t. He knows everything. He knows it was all a lie. He’s been miserable without you, walking around all mopey, all the time. Do you not love him anymore?”

That question almost stings, the lump in his throat growing, it’s difficult to even reply. “Of course, I still love him. I always will, I feel empty without him.”

“So then why leave?”

“I’m no good for him, Liv. I never deserved him. All I ever did was hurt him, when all I wanted was for him to be happy, because if anyone in this world deserves to be happy…it’s him.” He admits.

“But I’d be happiest with you.” Aaron stands behind Robert, tears in his eyes. He looks over at Liv and thanks her. “Smart move keeping the phone on, while you distracted him. I ran over when I heard his voice over the phone.”

Robert looks down at Liv’s hand and sees her phone lit up, call still running, before she ends the call. “And here you were going on about me sneaking about.”

“I think I’ll leave you two to it.” Liv says and takes a second look at Aaron. “Don’t mess this up. Make sure he stays, I’ll go and order us some Pizzas.”

“Aaron, I…” Robert starts but Aaron quickly cuts him off.

“You’re such an idiot.”

“Come again?” Robert replies confused.

“You really are. What on earth makes you think that I could possibly be happy without you in my life? If you think I’m going to let you walk away then you are the biggest mug in the world. Now please stop doing this to yourself. Stop taking blame for everything, even things you never did, and please stop feeling like you don’t deserve this, like you don’t deserve me. You remember what you told me back on the day of the crash? You told me that I was enough. Robert, so are you. You are more than enough, you are worth more than you’ll ever know, you’re everything.”

Robert takes a deep breath, his chin trembling, as he tries to keep his composure. He looks down at his feet before he asks. “Are you sure this is what you…” Robert hasn’t even finished asking when Aaron’s lips are on his, he pulls him in tight for a hug.

“Oi, you two want to stop with the snogging and come in already. Pizza should be here any minute now.” Liv yells out the door.

Aaron laces his fingers through Robert’s and takes his bag from him before leading him back into the Mill. Their home. As they walk through the doors Aaron steps back and gives him a look over. “You look awful.” He says, before giving him a light peck on his cheek.

“It’s what I told him.” Liv chimes in.

“Well, don’t hold back or anything.” Robert fires back.

Aaron smiles as he pulls Robert’s head down and kisses his forehead as he runs his fingers through his hair. “Just need to get some food and rest in you.” They’ve been apart for months now, yet they so easily fall back into being with each other, it’s like second nature to them. They spend the next hour eating as Robert tells them about how he found Andy, but before he gets too far into it, he’s out cold. Both Aaron and Liv figured he would pass out, the exhaustion was clear on his face, the dark circles on his eyes, the heavy lids through their dinner, they were surprised he lasted as long as he did. Liv cleans off the coffee table before saying goodnight and retiring to her room for the night. Aaron lays Robert down on the sofa and covers him up, gently kissing his lips. He writes him a note letting him know that he’ll be back soon, in case he wakes before he returns, and sends a text to Victoria as he heads out the door and back to his mum’s.

It’s late at night and fairly cold out, but it’s not even phasing Aaron, he can’t help but smile as he makes his way back to Chas’. The pubs already closed so he makes his way in through the back and as he enters he hears everyone still there, still in commotion, over Andy’s return and the news that Robert wouldn’t be coming back. Victoria is still crying, thinking she won’t see Robert again. As she sees Aaron, she wipes her tears away and walks over to him. “What is it? What’s this news you had to tell me in person?” It takes her a second to recognize the look on his face before she adds. “And why are you smiling?” He feels like his body is buzzing with excitement, with happiness, he pulls her in for a hug. “What’s gotten into you, pet?” Diane calls out from the kitchen, where she prepares some coffee with Chas.

“He’s home!” Aaron shouts out. No longer able to contain it. “He’s home, Vic!” He repeats.

“Robert?” she quickly asks.

“Yeah, Vic. He’s home.”

“Really? I have to see him!” Victoria lets out as she starts for the door, Diane behind her.

“No, hang on.” Aaron quickly stops them and lets them know that he is resting. He tells them that he’s okay, but really needs to rest.

“He was exhausted, passed out shortly after he got home. I just wanted to let you all know that he’s home and okay. Maybe you all can stop by tomorrow for tea, a bit of a welcome home?” He asks before looking back to Victoria. “Think you can put something together for him? Nothing crazy.”

“Yeah, of course. I’ll get Marlon to help… I know you said nothing crazy, but both Andy and Robert are back, so you’re off your head if you think this isn’t going to be major.” Victoria says, excitement on her face.

“That’s brill, Vic. We can provide the drinks, and if there’s anything else I can help with let me know.” Chas adds.

“That really is brilliant, a welcome home for both our boys.” Diane adds.

Victoria, Chas, Bernice, and Diane are now in full party planning mode. Running through everything they will need to get done on such short notice. Only thing left is the location, as they realize the pub won’t work, there won’t be enough space for everyone. Aaron cuts them off to offer the Mill. “We’ll do it at ours. The garden will be perfect.” They all agree and finish up the planning.

Victoria walks back over to Aaron giving him a hug. “I’m sorry for going overboard with it, I know you didn’t want anything crazy, but they’re both back. How could we not do something big?”

“No Vic, you’re right. It has to be perfect. I want it to be perfect for them…for him. I want everyone to be there when I show him what he means to me, and it’s going to be proper this time.”

“Are you saying what I think your saying?” Chas jumps in on the conversation.

Aaron nods in response and Chas jumps in for a hug smiling.

_______

It’s been so long since he’s slept. Really slept. He’s had nights where he’d drank until he passed out and the occasional night where he’d use some sort of prescription to lull him into what some would consider sleep, yet Robert finds himself curled under the comforter with a pillow tucked against his chest. He inhales gently and all he can smell is Aaron, with a soft smile he thinks to himself that he must be dreaming, then worries if he opens his eyes he’ll see that he’s in some dodgy hotel, like one of the many he stayed in while he searched for his brother, Andy. Refusing to let go of the bliss, he keeps his eyes closed and inhales once again, he smells Aaron and…bacon? The smell of bacon has confused him enough to lightly open his eyes. He’s not entirely sure where he is, the room is still dark with the blinds closed and a minimal amount of light peering through. It takes a moment for his eyes to adjust, but the moment things start to come into focus he knows exactly where he is. He’s home, in bed, his and Aaron’s. As Robert comes to, he hears the bedroom door open and looks over to see Aaron gently walking in. Aaron makes his way over to Robert’s side and bends over to gently kiss his forehead before softly ruffling his hair. “Hiya sleepy head.” Aaron whispers.

“You still tired? I can let you sleep a bit longer if you want.”

“No, no. I’m good. Better than good, really. I can’t remember the last time I slept like that.” Robert says as he reaches out and wraps his arms around Aaron’s waist, pulling him down on top of him. He places a few kisses on Aaron’s neck and breaths him in, his scent almost intoxicating, in the best of ways.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” Robert says into Aaron’s neck.

“No more than I’ve missed you.” Aaron returns, as he places a kiss on Robert’s temple.

Though the kiss was gentle, Robert takes it as an invitation and takes Aaron’s face between his palms and places his lips on Aaron’s. They melt into each other, as the kissing gets heavy and passionate. Tongues exploring each other’s mouths, hands roaming. Aaron finally breaks. “Fuck! I wish we could continue this, I really do, but Liv’s downstairs making brekkie and we have to get ready for the party.”

“What party?” Robert asks as his hands continue to roam over Aaron’s body.

“Robert…seriously.” Not sure he can hold out much longer, Aaron gently pushes off of Robert.

“We’re having a bit of a get-together in the garden later. A welcome home for you and Andy, actually. And before you say anything, it was Vic’s idea.”

“Can’t we cancel and just spend the day in bed…catching up?” Robert jokes.

“Quit being lazy and get up, will you. Or am I going to have to sick Liv on you?” Aaron laughs as he heads for the door. He turns before stepping out, locking eyes with Robert. “I told mum, Liv is spending the night at hers, so we’ll have the place all to ourselves tonight.” He says with a smirk on his face, as he walks out.

Coming down the spiral staircase Robert can hear plates being set and the familial banter between Aaron and Liv. Thinking of how much he’s missed, this brings a smile to his face. As she sets toast on the table, Liv sees Robert coming down the stairs. “Take your time, why don’t you.” She teases.

“Sorry about that, just needed a quick shower. A cold one.” Robert smirks at Aaron

“You mad? Why would you take a cold shower?” Liv asks, as Aaron lets out a chuckle looking mortified.

Before Robert even sits down, Aaron places a full plate at the table for him. “You…eat. We need to put some weight on you.” He says to Robert as he heads to the door, grabbing his jacket and keys.

“And where are you off to?”

“Need to take care of a few things for the party. Won’t take long.” Aaron replies, turning to Liv, before he adds “And you, make sure he doesn’t go anywhere.” Before stepping out.

The moment Aaron is out the door, Robert jumps straight to it. “So, what’s this party about?” Liv looks back at him with a raised brow. “Like anyone ever tells me anything.” Robert chuckles. “I think he’s up to something.”  Liv looks at him, shaking her head. “Or, maybe he’s just happy to have you back? He did say it was a welcome home, didn’t he?”

“Yeah but this is Aaron we’re talking about, he’s not really on for parties.” He adds before taking a bite out of his toast, realizing just how hungry he is. He’s not even sure when the last time was that he had much of an appetite, but being back home, with Aaron, with Liv, has made everything feel right again. He was able to sleep through the night without any problems and his appetite seems to be back, with a vengeance. Robert is deep in thought, not realizing a smile has crept across his face, when Liv looks over, she rolls her eyes before throwing a piece of toast at him. “What are you smiling at? You look creepy.” He chuckles back. “Sorry, just happy to be back…” A knock at the door interrupts their conversation, Robert quickly picks up the piece of toast Liv just threw at him and eats it, making a face at her, before starting for the door. Liv cuts him off. “I’ll get it. You finish your breakfast. I don’t want Aaron nagging at me for not taking care of you.” As Liv runs for the door, Robert yells after her. “You, take care of me? That’s rich.”

Victoria walks in, cradling food between her chest and chin, trying to keep it from falling. As she heads into the kitchen, Robert tries to help her and is quickly shot down. “No, you sit down and eat. We need to get some food in you.”

“Why is everyone on me about eating?” He asks.

“Because you almost look like one of them zombies you hate so much.” Victoria jokes. “Seriously though, you are looking a little rough around the edges and we just want you looking your handsome self for the party.”

“What’s so special about this party? He asks.

“Because, we are celebrating both of my brothers being back home. Andy gets to see his little girl and boy again, after all this time, and you, you get another chance with the love of your life, how could it possibly be any more special than that?” She says as she bumps his shoulder. “Now finish up, so you can start helping me get ready for the party.”

They’ve been in the kitchen now, for about an hour, Robert doing most of the cooking as Victoria takes care of the prepping. He always forgets how at ease he feels in the kitchen, cooking, he’s very good. Victoria often asks him why he didn’t pursue it. She nags him about what a great team they would make, and the dream restaurant they could have. Part of him has thought about it, just as he’s also thought about being a mechanic, but his insecurities have always been his downfall. Not feeling like he’s good enough has always held him back, Aaron is changing that. With Aaron by his side he feels like he can do anything…even humor Victoria. “You know, we really do make a great team in the kitchen.” The moment he says those last words he sees the flash in her eyes. “Of course, we do. I’ve been telling you for years!” She starts to ramble in excitement about how amazing it would be to work together and what kind of restaurant she wants them to have and all he can do is smile. Though part of him was only humoring her, he can’t help thinking that maybe it’s not such a bad idea. For the second time today, he finds himself interrupted mid thought by knocks at the door. “I’ll get that!” Liv yells out from the living room, where she’s been glued to one of the gaming chairs Robert had bought for her and Aaron, and makes her way to the door. Nicola is at the door, looking as unfriendly as usual, as she walks through the door, she turns yelling at Jimmy and Rodney. “Take them around the back, to the garden, and start setting up the tables!” She gives Liv a half-hearted smile as she walks in looking around. “You know, I believe this is my first time inside this place since before…” She stops herself, preferring not to think about the accident, preferring not to think about how she ended up in her current condition. She pans around and spots Robert in the kitchen with Victoria. “You.” She points to him. “While those two idiots start setting up back there, I figured I’d bring these over to you.” As she walks over to him, Victoria takes over in the kitchen so they can speak. Nicola hands him a large envelope and gives him a quick smirk. “Glad to see you back, Robert.”

“What’s this?” He asks, opening the envelope. As he pulls out the papers he flinches in surprise.

“Oh, come on. I may be heartless, but did you really think we were just going to keep your shares. Now, if you want us to buy you out, well that’s a different story. Besides, you’re back now, for good, right?”

He nods to her.

“Then, these belong to you. Besides, business hasn’t been the same since you left. I can’t handle it all on my own, you know both Jimmy and Dad aren’t good for much.”

“Thank you, Nicola.”

“Don’t get soft on me…I should probably go check on those two, make sure they don’t break anything.”

With Nicola stepping out, Robert looks at his watch to check the time, realizing Aaron’s been gone for a couple of hours now. “Hey, Vic. You know where Aaron went?”


	7. Mine Says Mr. Sugden

 

“You look nervous, luv.” Chas whispers into Aaron’s ear, as she holds on to his arm. Nervous isn’t right though, not for a second, what he is, is anxious. He knows that this is exactly what he wants, and he knows deep down that Robert wants it just as much. Knowing that is what has him so anxious, so ready for this. Tonight, cannot come fast enough. Aaron stands near the counter, fidgeting, messing with his ring finger. The finger that was once adorned by a ring. It’s a habit he’s formed since Robert gave it to him, that’s only gotten worse since he gave it back. Though he’s never been one for jewelry, that ring had been the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen, next to Robert, and it meant the world to him. A small ache tugs at his heart, thinking back at the day he took it off, handing it back to Robert, the look on his face as he gave him a final kiss. “So, are you?” Chas asks, pulling him from his thoughts. He smiles, looking back at her. “Sorry mum…no, not really nervous. I just hope he likes them, that he doesn’t hate what I did to them.” Chas looks at him in that motherly way that always comforts him, makes him feel loved, cherished. “Oh luv, of course he’s going to love them. I rather think it’s very sweet.” She leans in and gives him a quick hug. “My baby, being so sweet. Didn’t think you had it in you.” Chas teases, pinching his cheek. “Shut up. You’re going to make me regret even telling you.” He looks at his watch to check the time and exhales loudly, clearly agitated now. “We’ve been here for almost two hours, how much longer is it going to take?”

Chas tugs at his arm, trying to calm him. “I’m sure they’ll be done any minute now. We knew it was going to be a while, since you rushed them last minute.”

He tries to relax, his shoulders ease and drop. “I know. I just…he just got back. I should be home with him. You know, making up for lost time.” Chas, again gives him that motherly look. “Oh luv, you’re just melting my heart today, aren’t you?” She teases quickly, before continuing. “You boys have the rest of your lives, you’ll have plenty of time. Besides, you’ve waited all these months, a couple of hours should be nothing.”

Her words already making him feel better, he nods in agreement, just as the cashier returns. “Finally!” The excitement in his voice obvious.

It’s cold out and as festive as the village looks right now, with all the Christmas decorations, it doesn’t compare to Hotten. It might still be early, but the town is buzzing, people everywhere, most of them shopping. Luckily for them they’d already gotten that done themselves, they had gotten there early enough to avoid most of this foot traffic, something Aaron was grateful for. Chas had dragged Aaron around from shop to shop after they had dropped off Aaron’s order with the shop. She took the time to get all her Christmas shopping done, since they knew they were going to be waiting a while. Presents for everyone, extras for Robert, Aaron reckons she feels guilty about the way she’s treated him. They make a quick stop at a café for some coffee and head back to Aaron’s car. As they walk side by side, Chas having looped her arm through Aaron’s, she leans into him and asks “So, how is he?”

“He’s okay. He got plenty of rest last night and I left Liv to make sure he ate. He looked a bit rough. Vic told me that it was pretty bad for him after I left for Ireland. He didn’t cope well at all, mum. I hate myself for leaving the way I did.”

“I’m so sorry luv. You two have been through so much, it really just breaks my heart. I don’t blame you though, after what Andy told us about Robert…I’ve been so horrible to him. Yeah, a bit of it may have been deserved, but not all and knowing where it all came from…well, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry. Sorry for the way I’ve treated him.”

“Mum, it’s not me you should be apologizing to.”

“No, I know that dear. I plan on apologizing to him as well, but I know it must have been hard on you watching me treat him that way. For that, I’m sorry.”

“No need to apologize, mum. You were only trying to look out for me.” He replies, as he wraps his arms around her for a hug, a ding from his pocket catches their attention. A text from Robert.

_Robert: Where are you?_

_Aaron: Just getting in the car. On our way back._

Aaron made record time on the drive back from town, he was ready to be back home, ready to see Robert again. They’d been separate for long enough, getting a citation for speeding right now would’ve been worth it. As he walks through the door with Chas behind him, he spots Robert in the kitchen, leaning against the counter with Sam and Lydia on either side of him. They’re on about dancing, as Lydia tries to show off some moves, and Robert just looks like he’s about to hang himself. If his eyes could roll any harder, they’d shoot through the back of his head. Aaron laughs aloud, grabbing Robert’s attention, who practically flies over to him without even excusing himself from Sam and Lydia. “Thank god you’re here, I don’t know how much more of that I could take. I don’t even know who she is.” He tries to whisper.

Aaron doesn’t even reply, he leans in, placing his lips to Robert’s with a gentle kiss. Just like that, it’s as if everything else melts away and they are the only two people in the room. The only thing that matters is this kiss between them. It doesn’t last long, but it leaves Robert in a daze. “What was that for?”

“What, so now I need a reason to kiss you?”

Robert quickly shakes his head. “No, it’s just, it caught me off guard.” He bites his lower lip keeping his eyes on Aaron’s. “Where have you been?”

“Me mum had to run into town this morning for a couple of things for the party, so she asked me for a lift. All good now.”

“Hiya, Robert.” Chas says, as she steps around Aaron, walking up to him, pausing for a second as Robert tries to say something. “Chas…” He starts before she cuts him off. “Listen luv, I’m sorry for everything you’ve been through and for the way I’ve treated you. I hate myself for making you feel like you couldn’t come to me with your problems. When he went away to prison…I know it was hard for all of us. It broke my heart to see him go, but I should have been there for you, just as you where there for him and Liv. I should have made a bigger effort, we are family after all, aren’t we?”

“No Chas, you have nothing to apologize for. Everything you did, you did to protect Aaron. I would never blame you for that, and I hate myself for not coming to you about what was going on…I was just so used to always being on my own, always dealing with things on my own, bottling things up.”

“Oh luv, but you’re not alone. Not anymore.”

Hearing those words, especially from Chas, mean the world to him. Robert knows that they’ve had a very rough history, most of it due to his actions, what he had done, how he had hurt Aaron and those around him. He’s not that man anymore, hasn’t been since he met Aaron, who gradually made him a better person. Having her full acceptance is something he didn’t realize he needed. He has tears in his eyes, as he gently pulls her into a hug. “Thank you, Chas. You have no idea what that means to me.”

“Oh, I’m going to ruin my make-up if we keep this up. Think it’s for the best if we stop with the soppy stuff for now. We really should finish setting up for the party. Zack and Lisa are on their way and Cain is closing up the garage early, so he’ll also be here soon.” Chas says.

“Vic said that Diane and Doug are on their way. Andy and Bernice are already out back with Jack and Sarah. Debbie and Belle are also back there helping Vic.” Robert adds.

Aaron checking on his phone, looks up to add “Marlon says they just closed up so he, Charity, and Granny are on their way. I’ll check with Paddy.”

Robert quickly replies to Aaron. “Oh, I just spoke to Paddy before you got here. He’ll be here in a bit, he’s just picking up Rhona and Leo.”

They quickly glance at each other and smile, both thinking about how crazy this all is. Just a week ago neither of them knew if they would ever see each other again, yet here they stood, in the home they built together, preparing for a party where they will be surrounded by their families and loved ones.

Within an hour all their guests had arrived, both the Dingles and Sugdens all together in one place with free drinks, this will certainly be a night to remember. The music is blasting as Robert and Aaron finally join in on the party. They walk hand in hand as they try to greet everyone and can’t help but feel comfort in seeing so many others finding their way back to each other. They see Paddy at a table bouncing Leo on his lap, Rhona at his side, leaning on his shoulder. They fought it for a while, but they are clearly making another run at it. Cain and Moira, who Aaron is taking full credit for, share a drink as Moira has her arm looped around his. Aaron noticed the way Moira looked at Cain when he was seeing Harriet, and after the short fling ended, he pushed Cain to reconnect with her. Granted it didn’t take much pushing. Andy and Bernice have been inseparable since his return, they’ve already discussed getting married soon. Chas herself recently started seeing Jason again. Charity had been pushing these two together for a while, so when Jason came around asking for Chas, she couldn’t help herself on playing matchmaker. Having a cop in the family is all she’s been talking about since. Seeing all of them together again, makes them feel even more like this, them, it was meant to be.

Once they’ve been through and greeted everyone they come to a stop and look around at all the faces looking back at them. It makes Robert pause for a moment, confused. “Why is everyone looking at us?” He asks before realizing they are dead center between everyone and the music has stopped. “What’s going on?” He asks noticing Victoria by the speaker system, massive smile on her face. As he turns back to Aaron he sees him with the same smile on his face, before he starts.

“Before you, I’d spent most of my life feeling broken…empty. Spent so much of it wishing it would all just stop. I wanted it all to just go away, god knows I tried to make it all go away more than once, but lucky for me, I had them.” Aaron gestures to his family and friends surrounding them. “If it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t have been around to meet you.” He reaches for Robert’s hand, placing it over his chest as he continues. “When I’m with you, I don’t feel broken, I don’t feel empty…you make me feel complete. You’ve made me want to live my life, to be happy, to do things I never would have before… you once told me that when you met me, it changed everything, and you know what? You were right. Meeting you changed everything. I can’t imagine my life without you. I don’t want to imagine it without you. So…” He pauses before he reaches into his jackets inner pocket and pulls out a ring box, as he gets down on one knee. “Robert Jacob Sugden, will you marry me?”

Robert holds his gaze with Aaron, neither of them having looked away from each other. Tears in both their eyes. Silence hangs in the air for a second, quickly broken by Robert’s reply. “Yes! Of course, I’ll marry you.” Aaron quickly jumps up for a hug. Their lips on each other as everything, everyone, else melts away. Everyone around them cheering them on. As Aaron pulls the ring from the box, Robert recognizes it, reaching for his chest, feeling for the rings. When he left the village intending it to be for good, he had finally taken his wedding ring off, it had been just as painful as when Aaron took his off and gave it back. Though their marriage had ended, his love for Aaron never would. He couldn’t bear the through of losing the rings so he kept them on a chain around his neck.

“Sorry, I hope you don’t mind. I sort of nicked them off you while you slept. These meant a lot to me, so getting new ones felt wrong.” Aaron confesses.

“No…I’m glad you wanted to keep these.”

“I did have them inscribed though, hope you like them.”

“Really? What do they say?” Curious, Robert asks as he takes the ring from Aaron. “Mr. Dingle.” He reads, a smile spreading across his face.

“Mine says Mr. Sugden.” Aaron says smiling.

“I love them.” Robert says as he leans in, placing his lips on Aaron’s.

Taking the ring back from Robert, Aaron asks for his hand. He gently slides the ring onto Robert’s finger as Chas comes up with a second box and hands it to Robert. She gives him a quick hug and kisses his cheek. “Here you go luv.” He smiles at her as he pulls the ring from the box before turning to Aaron and asking for his hand, sliding the ring onto his finger.

With everyone still watching and cheering, Chas again goes in for a hug, this time grabbing both Aaron and Robert at once. Liv runs up and jumps in. “Group hug!” She yells. Mid-hug, Paddy grabs their attention and quickly snaps a picture. “You guys are going to love this.” He says, after the shot.

The party goes late into the night, everyone celebrating, making toasts to the return of Andy and Robert, as well as to the newly engaged Robert and Aaron. It was never Aaron’s intention to have it turn into such a massive party, but seeing everyone here celebrating, having fun, having the man that he loves back home, made everything feel right. The party being this major was exactly how it should have been. He’s forgotten all his worries, all his doubts, and in this moment, all he feels is bliss. Everything else has faded away. He finds himself lost in this feeling, so much so, that he doesn’t even realize he’s dancing to the music. Not until he notices Chas, Liv, Paddy, and Belle staring at him with their jaws hanging. For a second he almost stops himself, until he feels Robert’s hands on him and he realizes the doesn’t care. He has everything he never knew he wanted, he’s happy, and he doesn’t care if anyone sees it. He smiles back at them and waves them over to join in on the fun.

As the party finally winds down, a final toast is made by Andy. “Robert, I know we’ve had our ups and downs, and that we haven’t always been so great to each other, but I want to thank you, from the bottom of my heart. If it wasn’t for you, I would never have been brought into this family when we were kids and I certainly wouldn’t be here today...back home, with my kids, with my family. You’re an amazing bloke and you deserve to be happy, don’t ever think otherwise. I love you brother.” He says, raising a glass, tears in his eyes. “And Aaron, you be good to my brother. You make him a better man, I hope you know that.” With that, everyone raises their glasses. “Cheers!”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter takes place right after the party. With all the guests gone and Liv at Chas' for the night. The boys finally have some proper alone time...dirty dirty alone time. Smut on its way.


	8. I've Missed This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dirty dirty fun time for Robron. After the party is done Robert gives himself fully to Aaron.

 

 

Shortly after the final toast, most of the guests have gone. Victoria, Chas and Liv stay behind to help the boys with clean up. It’s very clear that the free drinks left everyone in a good mood, the mess left behind is proof enough. Aaron and Robert walk around collecting beer bottles, though they don’t get much done, as they can’t keep their hands of each other and it’s not long before they decide to call it quits and send the girls packing. Once they are out of sight, Aaron takes Robert’s hand and leads him back inside the Mill. They’re barely through the door when he shoves Robert against the wall and takes his lips, he’s been wanting this for hours and he’s done waiting. He pauses for a moment staring into his beautiful clear blue eyes, even in the low light of the entry way, they are stunning…breathtaking. The moment doesn’t last long before their lips are back on each other, he feels Robert’s tongue parting his lips and welcomes it…he can’t get enough of it. As their tongues explore each other’s mouths, his hands quickly find themselves unbuckling Robert’s belt and their kissing goes from tender to hungry. “Hang on, let’s take this upstairs.” Says Robert, trying to catch his breath. Aaron nods and laces his fingers with Robert’s as he leads them up the spiral staircase and to their room. As they walk through the door, he again turns and shoves Robert against the wall, taking his mouth for a minute before dropping to his knees and immediately going for his belt. He’d been so desperate to do it before but Robert stopped him, this time however, nothing would stop him. Before Robert even realized it, his belt was undone and his trousers were on the floor. He hears the gasp coming from Robert the moment he takes him in his mouth. _Fuck, I’ve missed this._ He thinks to himself, as he pleasures him. He loves sucking Robert off almost as much as he loves bottoming for him and he’s been waiting for this all day. As he tries to deep throat him, his eyes water and he slowly pulls back, he’s never been able to fully do it, Robert is slightly too big. Their first time together Aaron was eager to get a hold of Robert’s dick, something about the bulge in his pants told him Robert was hung and he wasn’t disappointed. “I swear Robert, if you don’t fuck me right now, I’m going to lose it.” He finally lets out under his breath.

Robert looks down at him, red in his cheeks, he almost looks embarrassed. “What is it? Did I do something wrong?” Aaron asks. The flush in his face growing, Robert now looks almost nervous. Before Aaron can ask again, Robert interrupts him. “I just…” He pauses for a second. “I’d quite like you to fuck me.” Caught off guard Aaron lets out a small gasp. “But you’ve never let anyone do that.”

“Well, you’re not just anyone are you? I want you to have all of me.” Robert replies. He looks a bit nervous but there is certainty in his voice, sincerity in his eyes, he meant what he asked. “Are you sure? I don’t want you to do something you don’t really want to do.” Aaron can tell he means it, but he asks anyway. He wants to make sure that Robert wants it and feels comfortable doing it. Robert looks him directly in his eyes as he nods and gives him one of his signature smug smirks. The sight of that smirk sends shivers down his spine. He was already hard after sucking him, but hearing Robert ask him to fuck him was nearly enough to make him come without even touching himself.

“Take it easy on me though, yeah?”

“We’ll take it slow. I don’t want to hurt you, so you tell me if it hurts, yeah?”

Robert nods, already looking more relaxed. The nervousness seems to be leaving him. Aaron stands and begins kissing Robert’s neck and slowly moves down to his shoulder, noticing him relax even more, feeling the tension leave his body and his shoulders dropping. He takes Robert’s hand and leads him towards the bed. “Lay down on your stomach.” He says and without questioning Robert does as he’s told. Once Robert is spread across the bed, Aaron takes the chance to admire his fiancé. He can tell he’s lost some weight, but his favorite part still looks the same, round and plump. “I fucking love your ass, Robert.” He whispers before kneeling at the end of the bed and pulls Robert back enough so that his ass is close enough for what he’s about to do.  He gently spreads Robert’s cheeks apart before learning in and lightly running his tongue down the center of his hole. Hearing Robert gasp at the sensation only turns him on even more, he may not last too long at this rate. He’s never done this before, but Robert has rimmed him plenty of times, says he loves doing it before fucking him and Aaron loves every second of it. He hopes that knowing what feels good will be enough of a guide to return the pleasure to him. It’s not long until he has him writhing and moaning in pleasure, his tongue tracing along the edges of his hole before he presses into the center and gently licks. “Fuck. Aaron…oh my god.” Robert mumbles as he bites into his forearm. Aaron stops momentarily to ask if he likes. “FUCK YES!” he replies. Before going back in, Aaron places a finger in his mouth and slicks it up before pulling it back out and placing his tongue back into Robert’s hole to prep him. Though he’s loving every moment of this, he’s dying to be inside him, the thought of being inside him alone is driving him crazy, making his dick leak with precum. “Aaron…please.” He hears Robert beg, if this keeps up he’s definitely going to lose it. Taking that as an invitation, he slowly presses his finger through his hole. “You’re so tight, Robert.” He says, biting down on his lip. A pleasured moan is all he gets in return. “You tell me if it hurts, yeah?” Aaron asks. “Yeah.”

He presses his finger in deeper as he bites down on Robert’s ass, making him moan, he’s being as gentle as possible, he wants nothing more than for Robert to enjoy every second of this. Judging by the moans coming from Robert, he is. As he starts to add a second finger he feels him wince a bit, then tense. “Relax, if you tense up, it’s going to hurt.” Aaron says gently before licking at his hole, hoping it will relax him again. He feels the tension leave Robert’s body and goes back to slide in a second finger slowly, making sure not to hurt him, taking his time to enjoy this as much as Robert seems to be. As he fingers him, he takes turns between biting and licking at his cheeks, he wants to be gentle, but part of him wants to leave a mark, wants to mark what’s his. Once he feels that Robert’s ready for another finger, he reaches under him, pulling his dick back before licking it gently. He licks at the slit, savoring the precum that’s leaking as he jerks him off for a moment before enveloping him in his mouth. Even at this angle, it’s almost too much to take. He can feel it hitting the back of his throat as he sucks him and as he pulls back he licks up the shaft to his taint. He takes his time, making sure that the pleasure will keep him relaxed as he pushes in a third finger. As he slides his fingers in and out of him, all he hears are the most amazing moans coming from Robert, as he begins to push back onto his fingers. He’s ready.

 

________

 

“Fuck…Aaron, please. I need you.” Robert is unravelling, every touch, every bite, every lick, is driving him mad. He’s never wanted Aaron more than he does now. “I swear Aaron, if _you_ don’t fuck _me_ right now, I’m going to lose it.” He says with a playfulness to his voice, repeating what Aaron had earlier said to him. He feels Aaron pull his fingers out and though there’s a slight disappointment, he knows what’s coming, is what he’s been waiting for. Though part of him is nervous, because he’s never done this before, he’s overwhelmed by his desire for Aaron. He wants this, needs it, needs Aaron inside him. _Fuck, I’ve been missing out._ He thinks to himself, before he feels Aaron’s hands on his hips, lifting him up. He’s so used to being in control when they have sex, but right now he is loving every moment of this…Aaron being in control, prepping him, placing him in whatever position he wants. He’s not questioning anything just doing as Aaron asks, he gets up on all fours as Aaron guides him up before he feels him bend over him. Aaron’s chest is to his back, when he pulls his head back and takes his mouth while his right arm reaches down and begins to stroke his dick for a moment. “Stay here.” Aaron whispers into his ear. “Where are you going?” He asks desperately. “Condoms are in the nightstand.” Aaron says, nodding towards the nightstand. “No…don’t. I want you and only you, nothing between.” Robert pleads, looking into Aaron’s eyes. There’s a need in his eyes, it’s different than what Aaron is used to seeing, but he knows it’s a need for him. They’ve both been tested, both clean. The thought of fucking Robert was already driving him crazy, having Robert ask him to fuck him bareback nearly makes him come. He doesn’t have to talk him into it, he knows by the look of excitement on Aaron’s face that he wants it as much as him. Aaron quickly runs to the nightstand and grabs the lube before rushing back to Robert. “Still want to use some of this, it’ll make it easier.” Once he feels Aaron behind him he closes his eyes in anticipation and feels the tender kisses he is planting down his spine, he inhales slowly, taking in this moment. He’s back home, back with the love of his life, and now he’s about to fully give himself over to him.

There’s a pressure at first, a slight sting, as Aaron pushes in slowly. As he feels the head go in, he gasps slightly at the sting before Aaron slowly pushes in further. Once he feels that Aaron is fully in, he leans back so he’s on his knees and reaches his arm over his head, pulling in Aaron’s face for a kiss. Their tongues hungrily explore each other’s mouths as he adjusts to Aaron being inside of him. As Aaron begins thrusting into him he loses himself in the pleasure that’s overtaking him, surprised at how much he’s loving it. He finds himself pushing back into every thrust. He’s always been very vocal during sex, moaning, swearing, calling out Aaron’s name, and tonight is no exception. Tonight, it’s on another level. Aaron leans him forward a bit and begins to thrust a bit harder and faster, he begins to hit Robert’s prostate. “OH, FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!” He yells out as he reaches down and begins stocking his dick. “FUCK ME HARDER!” He begs Aaron. “You like that?” Aaron asks. “Oh God yes, Aaron, fuck me harder!” His breathing racing, his dick pulsing, he knows he’s about to come. “Oh God! Aaron, I’m going to come! Fuck me harder, Aaron! Harder!” As Aaron continues to thrust into him, hitting that spot, he finally loses it. His body is shaking and he’s shooting his load before he even realizes it.

He continues stroking himself, enjoying Aaron inside of him, wanting more. “Oh God. I’m going to come.” Aaron gasps, trying to pull out of Robert. “No, I want you to come inside me.” Aaron was already close, but hearing Robert say that pushes him over, unravelling him. Robert pushes back into him as he feels Aaron’s body shaking into its own release. He feels the pulsing of Aaron’s dick in his hole and hears the string of “Fucks” that he whispers into his ear until they are both spent and collapse on the bed together. Robert lays on his back, with an arm over his head, propping it up as Aaron lays his head on Robert’s chest, snuggling into his body. “So. Admit it, you’re impressed.” He teases Robert, thinking back to one of their first times. “That was fucking amazing. You were fucking amazing…we’re going to have to repeat that.”

“Yeah?” Aaron asks.

“Yeah.”

 


	9. Let's Move Past It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robert is no longer the man he once was, he's grown in so many ways since Aaron came into his life and after a tragic accident it's time to let go of the past and make peace with those he'd least expect to.

 

_DECEMBER_

“Hurry up, will ya!” Liv rushes Aaron, as he tries to get the Christmas tree through the front door. He’s trying not to make a mess, but she’s not helping much, all she’s accomplishing is doing his head in. “Oi, take it easy will ya! You’re lucky I even agreed to this. You know Robert doesn’t want one in the house.” He says, already regretting letting her talk him into getting a Christmas tree for the living room. He and Robert had argued about it for weeks, Aaron wanted a large tree for their first Christmas together in their new home, while Robert wanted to keep the place _classy and neat_. “Liv might be half feral, but that doesn’t mean we need a tree inside like a pack of animals.” He would argue. Christmas is only a few weeks away and even though every inch of the Village is decorated for it, the Mill still looks so sterile. Aaron is not much into design, so he left most of the Mill’s look and deco up to Robert, unfortunately for him, Robert’s tastes were a bit too clean and modern. Had Robert fully gotten his way, the interior would have looked like a space station, bright colors, straight lines, with a bit of industrial flare. Aaron and Liv tried to bring in some warmth into it wherever they could and bringing in a Christmas tree for the holiday is just what the place needs.

“Well then, I guess it’s a good thing he’s away on business, innit?” Liv teases back. “Yeah and I could’ve gone with him, if you hadn’t been so keen on making me stay behind to help ya.” He says, making a face at her. She immediately rolls her eyes at him. “He’s back tonight isn’t he? It’ll be a nice surprise and I know he’ll love.” With the tree over his shoulder, Aaron makes his way to the corner of the living room where they’ve made space for it. They had to move the telly, which was fine by him because he hated having it in a corner. He had Adam over to help him mount it above the mantel where it belonged. As he begins to set the tree down, there’s a knock at the door. Liv says she’ll get it as she heads for the door. “You get started on setting it up, I’ll get the door.”

As she opens the door, she’s caught off guard, surprised to see who’s at their door, the last person she ever thought she’d see around here. “You! What’re you doing here?” She scoffs. “Is…Robert around? I’m hoping I can have a word.” Rebecca says, with desperation in her voice. “What on earth makes you think that we’d let you near him?” She had already thought of him as family before everything happened and now much more. In her eyes, Robert is every bit her brother as Aaron is and she’ll protect him all the same. “Liv, look, I’m sorry for what I’ve done and I need to apologize to Robert.” She pleads. “No. What you need is to do one.” She says, as she’s about to slam the door in Rebecca’s face. “Oi, what’s taking so long?” Aaron asks, as he walks through the entryway. He immediately stops in place when he sees _her_ standing outside their door. It takes him a moment to gather himself, his thoughts, what he wants to say to her before he asks Liv to give them some privacy. She double checks to make sure that’s what he wants and reluctantly retreats inside, to continue setting up the tree. “I’ll just be inside working on the tree, Robert’s going to love it.” She says, with a snarky smile on her face, clearly trying to get to Rebecca. Aaron can tell what she’s doing, how she’s looking out for Robert and despite the current situation, it brings a smile to his face. A smile he keeps on his face as he turns back to Rebecca. “What do want, Rebecca?” Though this has been a long time coming, he didn’t think he’d get a chance to confront her, didn’t know if he could handle it, but after everything they’ve been through he now knows what he means to Robert…he knows he can do this, because he’s everything and she is nothing.

“Aaron, I don’t know what to say other than I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t make up for everything I’ve done, but I truly am sorry.” Rebecca starts. “You’re right, it doesn’t” He replies, pausing for a moment, collecting his thoughts. “You know, I was scared of you for so long because I was stupid enough to think that you could take him from me. I thought that I might not be enough for him, that you, with your history together, had something I couldn’t compete with. Now, I feel like such a mug, for thinking that because you…you’re nothing. You never were. You never will be. Not to him.” He says, noticing the hurt in her eyes, everything he just said was like a dagger to her heart. Every last bit of it stung.

“You’re right, Aaron. I was clearly never enough for him. I wasn’t enough to keep him from Chrissie and when you came into his life, nothing, no one will ever compare to you. He looks at you like you hung the moon for him. I hope you know that and for what it’s worth, I truly am sorry for what I’ve done, but can you blame me? Can you honestly tell me that you wouldn’t do anything and everything you could to keep him? I’ve loved him for much longer than you and I’ve lost him more than once. First to Chrissie, then to you. I never even had a chance and I hate myself for what I did because now I’ve lost him for good. If I could take it all back, I would.” She says, tears streaming down her face.

He wishes he could hate her for everything she’s done, for how she hurt him, for how she hurt Robert, but all he can do is pity her. Despite everything, he understands what she’s going through better than anyone. He remembers back to the moment when he fell for Robert, how he was willing to do anything for him, how he was willing to give up anything for him, how he was even willing to expose everything to Chrissie so he could finally have him to himself. He knows what it’s like to fall in love with him. “Look, he’s back home again and he’s happy, that’s all that matters…and you’re right, I would do anything for him. What you did though, the way you hurt him, I can never forgive you for that. I’ll accept your apology because I get it, I understand where you’re coming from, but that’s it. Besides, I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.”

“I know. It’s why I’m here. I need to try and make things right.”

“He’s not here right now. He’ll be back tonight. I’ll let him know you stopped by.”

“Thank you, Aaron.” She says before walking away.

The hold she had over him long gone, he walks back in to the living room feeling nothing but pity for her. He knows what he and Robert share and knows that nothing could come in between. _She_ could never come in between them, not anymore. “You get it all sorted?” Liv asks as she continues working on the tree decorations. “She wanted to apologize for everything. She apologized to me and wants to apologize to Robert.”

“She’s off her head if she thinks we’re letting her near him again.”

He’s glad that she feels the need to protect him, but he knows this is something that Robert must decide on his own. “It’s okay, Liv. She just wants to apologize. If Robert wants to listen, it’s up to him.” He tells her. “You of your head? Don’t tell me you believe her.”

“It’s more complicated than that, Liv. Look, I get where she’s coming from. I get it more than anyone else and I can tell she means it, but it’s Robert who must forgive her. It’s his decision to make. Whatever he decides, I’ll support and I hope you will do the same.”

 

________

 

The last couple of days had been such a drag with the non-stop meetings, once he was fully back in the grind and gone over the books it was clear to him that Nicola wasn’t kidding when she told him that business had not been the same after he left. He’d spent the last few days in Leeds and York meeting with new contacts getting both businesses back on track and then some. Everything had gone great and he’s gotten plenty of new business but regardless of how well everything has gone he can’t help but feel the absence of his better half, something he feels whenever Aaron is not by his side. Robert had tried to get Aaron to come along for the trip, but unfortunately Liv had other plans. She insisted on Aaron sticking around to help her, though she wouldn’t say what she needed help with she was keen on having Aaron stay behind with her. He knew her well enough to know she was up to something and having Aaron stay behind with her would be for the best. Lucky for him, his last meeting was moved up to first thing in the morning and it went by quickly enough that he made it back to home much earlier than planned. It’s only been a few days but his heart is racing at the thought of seeing Aaron, his fiancé. As he walks up to the door, he can hear the speakers blasting, along with Aaron and Liv cheering. They’re clearly playing video games, so unaware of anything else, they don’t even notice Robert as he walks through the door. He on the other hand, immediately notices the changes to the Mill…the telly has been mounted above the mantel and there are Christmas decorations around the place. He’s about to say something when his view zeros in on the tree in the corner and Liv notices him standing there. “Robert!” She yells out making Aaron also turn his attention, they both stand and notice what he’s looking at. “Surprise!” they yell out with smiles on their faces. Thinking back to the arguments they had weeks ago about the tree, all Robert can do is smile. “Oi, what’s this?” he asks with a serious face as both Aaron’s and Liv’s smiles slowly fade away. “It’s brilliant!” He adds, as he makes his way to them both for a hug. “You like it?” Aaron asks. “I love it.” Robert says, as he squeezes them into the hug. “See, I told you he’d love it.” Liv beams at Aaron. “Lucky guess.” He says, ruffling her head as he adds “Hey, can you give us a minute? I need to tell him about our visitor earlier today.” Robert looks at them both quizzically. “What visitor?”

He was happy to be home so early and much happier to see Aaron and Liv, but their sudden change in mood after Aaron’s mention of the visitor was worrying him. Nothing good can come from this, it’s obvious by how quickly the smiles disappeared and how quickly Liv retreated, the thought made his stomach drop, as he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. “You fancy a beer?” Aaron asked, breaking the tension. “What?” Robert replies, confused.

“A beer, do you fancy one?”

“You cheeky little git. You know what I meant.”

“I know, I’m trying to lighten the mood a bit, because you’re not going to like what I’m about to tell you.”

Robert keeps his gaze with Aaron, lump in his throat, he’s unsure if he wants to know what’s going one. They’ve been on such a high since he came back, since the party, since Aaron asked him to marry him and he’s afraid it’s all about to come crashing down. It is him after all, his luck always runs out and he’s way too happy for things to stay this way. He gives Aaron a longing look, trying to decide on how to take the news he’s about to get. “Okay, let’s just rip the band-aid right off, just tell me what it is. What’s going on?”

“ _She_ was here earlier…came by looking for you.”

“Who do you mean by _she_? Vic, Diane, Chas?”

“Rebe…” The full name hasn’t even left Aaron’s lips, but he can see the anguish in Robert’s eyes. He can see him thinking. Robert closes his eyes and purses his lips as he takes a moment. That name is the last thing he ever wants to hear and the person it belongs to, someone he never wants to see again. He inhales slowly and lets go of the breath before he opens his eyes back up and asks. “What did she want?”

“She wanted to apologize. Liv told her to do one…”

“Good, I hope she did.”

“That was before I walked over and saw who it was, had every intention of telling her the same, but she apologized to me. She apologized for everything and I hate myself for it, but I accepted her apology.”

“You off your head? Please tell me you didn’t buy it?”

“Robert, she meant it. I could tell she meant it. I’m not saying I forgive her, I can never forgive her, not for what she did to you, but I accepted her apology.”

“No…no, she’s up to something.”

“She’s not, Robert. She truly meant it and she wanted to apologize to you, I told her you’d be back tonight.”

“Absolutely not! I’m not talking to her, I don’t want her anywhere near us!” The news has gotten to him. He wasn’t sure what it was going to be and thought he had somewhat mentally prepared himself for it…he was wrong. He takes a deep breath to collect himself. “I need to go for a walk. Clear my head.” He lets out. “Yeah, no problem. Let me get my coat.” Aaron replies. “No. I need to be alone for a minute.”

“Tough, because you’re not alone. You. Me. We’re together now and there is no more dealing with things on our own. We’re not going to make the same mistakes again.”

Hearing him say those things brings him right out of the haze that was over him just seconds ago. Aaron’s right and he knows it. They’re together now and they will deal with anything that comes their way, together. He smiles, looking into Aaron’s beautiful blue eyes and takes his hand into his. “You’re right. No more bottling things up, no more dealing with things on my own. Grab your coat, we can go down to the pub for a pint or two, but we’re not talking about her. Not tonight. I just want to enjoy tonight with you.”

“Okay.”

Having dropped the subject for now, Robert embraces Aaron in a hug and squeezes him gently. This is all he wants. Aaron gives him a quick peck to his cheek and makes for his coat. “Come on, let’s go.” Robert nods and follows, sending Liv a text to let her know they are heading out for a while. They walk hand in hand on their way to the pub, enjoying the each other’s company, enjoying the slight flurry of snow that falls from the sky and it’s not too long before they arrive. Its audibly busy in there, they haven’t even made their way, when they hear Chas’ voice as she screams at someone. They can’t quite make out what’s being said, but she sounds angry. Instinctively, they react, running in to make sure Chas is okay and are hit with the one thing Robert was wanting to avoid.

“YOU HAVE A LOT OF NERVE WALKING INTO MY PUB AFTER WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO MY BOYS! YOU BEST GET OUT OF MY FACE BEFORE I DO SOMETHING I’LL REGRET, YOU STUPID COW!” Chas yells as Charity holds her back.

“Now, now, there’s no need for that. I suggest we all take a moment and calm down. She is pregnant and you making threats is very serious. We were just looking to have a meal, but we can certainly take our business elsewhere.” Lawrence tries to keep everything calm.

“Yeah, you do that. I don’t want any of you lot in my pub ever again.” Chas replies.

“Dad, please let’s just…” Rebecca starts, before she spots Robert. “Robert.” She says as she walks towards him, Aaron immediately cuts her off, stepping in between her and Robert. “This isn’t the time. I think you two should just go.” Aaron  

“But…” She tries.

“You heard him, just go.” Chas adds.

“Robert, please, I need…”

His face red with anger, Robert finally snaps. “NEED WHAT?! NO, YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU COULD POSSIBLY NEED. WHAT YOU NEED, IS TO LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!”

“Don’t you dare speak to her that way.” Lawrence steps up, he’s always hated Robert and would take any opportunity to show it. “This isn’t going to get any better, I suggest you two just go.” Aaron intervenes. Trying to save themselves from any further embarrassment, Lawrence holds on to Rebecca and leads her out of the pub.

“I’m so sorry about that luv, I tried getting her out of here the moment walked in, but she wasn’t budging.” Chas apologizes.

“It’s okay Chas. Not your fault and thanks for having my back.” Robert replies.

“Oh luv, no need for thanks. You boys need a drink? I know I do, after all that.”

Both Robert and Aaron agree, as she pours them a pint. After a few drinks, the scene is all but forgotten. Robert tells Aaron all about the trip and the new contacts he’s made for the businesses, while Aaron tries his best not to look bored. He would rather be at home in bed, catching up, but he knows Robert’s head must be all over the place and just wants to let him wind down, so he won’t push it. “You’re so cute when you space out, you know that?” Aaron is pulled from his thoughts. “I can tell you’re bored and you’d rather be doing something else, you want to tell me what that is?” Robert adds.

“Oi! What did you do this time?!” Ross barks, as he barges in towards Robert. Aaron immediately shoots off his stool and steps in between them. “I don’t think so mate.” He says, as he stares Ross down. “This doesn’t concern you, _mate_ …so back off.” Ross replies, pushing forward, hoping to intimidate Aaron. A tactic that clearly doesn’t work. There are very few people that can intimidate him and Ross Barton isn’t one of them. “You threaten him, you threaten me.” Aaron barks back and for a moment it looks like Ross has backed down, making Aaron drop his guard long enough for Ross to take a swing and land a hit, dropping Aaron to the floor. Looking down at him he smirks, a victory that doesn’t last long, before he even realizes it, he’s on the floor, blood rushing from his nose, Robert on top of him, taking a second swing. Robert is about to take another shot at him when Pete rushes in and pulls him off.

“If you ever touch him again, you’re dead.” Robert threatens. He’s never been a fan of his, especially after Ross shot and nearly killed him, but hurting Aaron was a mistake he wouldn’t get away with. He makes sure to look him in the eyes and smirks, returning the favor before turning back to check on Aaron. “You okay?” He asks. “Yeah, I’m fine. He got lucky.” Aaron replies. “So, what’s he on about?” They ask Pete.

“We just saw Rebecca and Lawrence going at it outside. He was going off on her, looked like he was about to burst, his face was so red. Ross tried talking to her, he’s been trying to since he found out about the baby, but she won’t give him the time…and of course he blames Robert.”

“Look, I have nothing to do with her. I haven’t even talked to her since I left back in August, let alone since I got back. I’m done with her, with that family, I want nothing to do with them. So whatever Ross thinks is going on, it’s between them.” Robert says, before turning to Ross and adding “You just keep me out of it.”

Pete picks Ross off the floor, telling him it’s for the best if they head out, having nothing further to say, he agrees. This time, he’ll just have to walk out defeated, with his tail between his legs. If he wants to talk to Rebecca, Robert is not the way in and getting on his bad side never ends well, so it will only make things worse. As they exit the pub, he turns to make peace and make one final attempt. “I’m sorry, alright. I just want to talk to her. If you do speak with her, can you please just have her call me? Please.” Ross pleads, before walking out.

With the scene over, the boys hit the bar, Chas waiting on them with icepacks, one for Aaron’s face and one for Robert’s fist. As he ices his fist Robert apologizes to Chas, but she quickly shoots him down. “No need to apologize, luv. You did nothing wrong, that was all Ross. Besides, I should be thanking you for that beating you gave him. He’s had that coming for a long time, and no one hits my baby boy and gets away with it.” She says to Robert, as she turns to tend to Aaron’s cheek. “So much for clearing your head, huh?” Aaron jokes, making Robert chuckle.

After a few drinks, they head back to the Mill with some take out, determined to not let what happened ruin everything, they decide to have a movie night at home with Liv. Aaron picks a super hero movie, he’s not the biggest fan of them, but he knows that Robert secretly loves them. He tries to hide it, but Aaron has overheard him geeking out over comics and manga with Finn on more than one occasion. As Liv makes a run to the kitchen for drinks, Aaron leans over pulling Robert’s head in to kiss his forehead. “You know, it’s actually really cute that you like super heroes. You don’t have to pretend.” Instantly he sees the flush of red creep up Robert’s face. “What do you mean?” Says Robert, trying to be coy. “Come on. I’ve heard you and Finn going on about comics and Death Note more than once, so you can drop the act Mr. Dingle. Besides, like I said… I think it’s cute.” Aaron says, winking an eye at him before Robert lunges at him, poking his stomach with tickles.

“Ugh…If you two are going to start snogging I’ll just go to my room.” Liv says, with a smile on her face before dropping down on her chair.

Aaron sits with his back against the corner nook of the couch, Robert sprawled on the couch between his legs, his head resting on Aaron’s chest. It’s not the most comfortable way to sit, but he wouldn’t change this for the world. The movie is about an hour in and though it’s not really his type of movie, he’s enjoying it. He finds himself smiling as he looks down at Robert, then over to Liv, both with the same look of wonder on their faces. It’s clear to him just how alike they are, they’ll never admit it, but it’s pretty clear. He leans down and places a kiss on Robert’s head, before breathing him in. “I love the little tree guy.” Robert says looking back up at Aaron. “And the Raccoon. Cheeky little git. Adds Liv. _How did I get so lucky?_ He thinks to himself, before they’re abruptly interrupted by loud banging at their door.

 

________

 

Robert pauses the movie and makes for the door as Aaron stands and follows. He’s dumbfounded the moment he opens the door and Chrissie jumps into his arms, black streams running down her face as her tears was away her make up. “Robert! It’s Dad, he’s dead.” She cries into his chest. He’s unsure of what to do, what to say. Not even sure what is going on. “What? What’s happened?” He asks, concerned. He may not have cared much for Lawrence, but he did care for Chrissie once, not just cared, but loved. He genuinely loved her at first, but after meeting Aaron their lives just took different paths and he realized he no longer wanted the same things in life that he had before. He wanted Aaron and no one else, he had to have him. Doing so destroyed Chrissie and ended their marriage. He doesn’t regret what happened, because it brought Aaron into his life, but he does regret how he handled things, he knows he hurt her and although he can’t change that, he can try to make amends.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know where else to go.” She sobs out into his chest.

“It’s okay, but please tell me what’s happened?”

“There was an accident, they think he may have had a heart attack while he was driving…Rebecca was with him. Dad didn’t make it and I don’t know if she’s going to.”

“I’m…I’m so sorry, Chrissie. Just let me grab my coat, we can take you, if you’d like.”

“Could you please? I don’t want to be alone, Lachey is away. I rang him to let him know, but I don’t want to be alone right now.” She cries out, barely able to get it out between sobs.

It’s getting late and Rebecca’s been in theater now for a couple of hours and there’s still no word on her condition. While Aaron makes a coffee run, Robert sits in the waiting room with Chrissie, trying to keep her calm, trying to keep her from losing it as she thinks of the worst. “It’s going to be alright, Chrissie. She’s a fighter, she always has been. She’ll pull through. You just have to think positive.” He assures her. “She’s all I have left. I know I have Lachlan, but she’s my sister. I’ve lost Mom and Dad already, I can’t lose her as well.” Chrissie replies between sobs. Neither of them expected to find themselves holding each other ever again, but at this moment, neither care. Chrissie needs support and Robert is willing to give it, a testament to his growth, the change in his character. Trying to keep herself from thinking the worst, she pulls back, wiping her tears, trying to recollect herself as she reaches into her purse, searching for something. Pausing for a moment she takes a deep breath, she knows this isn’t the time for this, but she needs to preoccupy her mind with something else before she caves under the fears of losing Rebecca. Pulling out an envelope, she looks back up at Robert, “Here. She wanted to give this to you and since you wouldn’t see her, she asked if I could give it to you. Not sure why she thought I’d have a better shot at it, given our history. It’s the trust fund you set up for the baby…she felt it was only right you got this back.” She says, handing the envelope to Robert. “I know it’s not really the time for this, but I need to think of something else, all this waiting, not knowing if she’s okay, it’s making things worse. Tell me, how is Andy? I haven’t had the nerve to go down to the village since you brought him back. For what it’s worth, I am sorry for what I did to him. I was angry. You two broke my heart, I can’t say that I was in the right state of mind after going through that twice, back to back. I know that’s not an excuse, but I am sorry. All that’s happened, Rebecca getting pregnant, my biological uncle showing up, and now this…it’s really made me think of family and what’s important”

“Your uncle?” Robert questions.

“Long story. Maybe we can grab some coffee some time and I’ll tell you all about it.”

“You and me? Having coffee?”

“I think it’s about time we put the past behind us, bury the hatchet, don’t you?”

Surprised, Robert pauses for a moment with a look of shock on his face, “Oh come on, don’t act so surprised. We were good friends once, maybe one day we could be that again.”

“Yeah. I’d like that, granted you owe Andy an apology more than me.” Robert replies, sincerity in his voice. He’s tired of all the aggro, he’s finally happy. It’s time to put everything behind him and move on. He’s made peace with others he’s hurt before – Andy, Chas, Paddy…why not Chrissie?

“So, how are things with Aaron? Sam told me that he popped the question.”

With a beaming smile, he replies. “Yeah. Completely caught me by surprise. I don’t know how he managed it, but it was perfect. That cheeky little monkey made it impossible for me when I tried it, but no, not him. His had to be perfect.”

“Oh, God, this is so weird…but I’m so happy for you Robert. You truly look happy…” Chrissie says, before they’re interrupted by Rebecca’s doctor.

“Ms. White?”

“Yes…Any news? How is she?” She quickly stands and walks over to the doctor, as Robert follows.

“We just got her out of theater. She’s going to be okay, but I’m afraid I have some bad news. Unfortunately, the baby did not make it. The impact she suffered was so severe, that it not only caused the placenta to detach, but internal bleeding as well. By the time she made it in, the baby was too far gone, deprived of oxygen. We had to focus on getting the internal bleeding under control to save her. Had we gotten to her sooner, we may have been able to save them both, but unfortunately it was too late. She is resting now and under sedation, you can go in for a moment to see her, if you’d like, but I recommend you let her rest until morning. If you have any further questions you can check in with the nurse at the station. I’m sorry for your loss.” The doctor informs them, before heading back.

“Do you want us to take you back for now? We can come back first thing in the morning.”

“No. It’s okay, I think I’m going to stick around, in case she wakes up. She shouldn’t be alone when she comes to.”

“I can wait with you, if you like.” Robert offers.

“No, it’s okay. You don’t have to.”

“Really…It’s okay, you shouldn’t be alone.”

“He’s right.” Aaron says walking back up to them with coffee. “We’ll keep you company. Might be a bit weird, because you know…but you shouldn’t be alone.” He adds getting a slight chuckle out of her.

“Weird sounds about right.” She adds.

It’s been a very long night, with people coming and going, plenty of people receiving good news and with few receiving bad. It’s hard enough getting bad news, but having to watch others receive it as well, it’s like getting kicked when you’re down. Aaron and Chrissie spent the night sharing complaints about Robert, as he tried to defend himself. A far cry from anything any of them could have ever thought would happen. However, as Aaron and Chrissie had expected, it was weird at first, but eventually lightened up into a bit of laugher. Exactly what Chrissie needed. Robert now finds himself sitting back, leaning against the wall with Aaron’s head on his lap as he’s stretched out on the couch they’re sharing… both dozing. Chrissie has been with Rebecca for a couple of hours now, she was there when she finally woke up and was shortly joined by her Doctor, to explain to her what happened with both her and Lawrence. Robert offered to go in with her, to break the news but Chrissie decided it was best for her to do it alone.

“Robert.” Chrissie gently calls out, waking him.

“Yeah?”

“She’s asking for you. You think you can talk to her?”

He hesitates at first, before he feels Aaron gently squeeze at his thigh and gives him a light nod, giving him the push he needed. He looks back to Chrissie and agrees to go in. He stands and walks past Chrissie, making his way into Rebecca’s room. Robert’s not sure what to say, he already has mixed emotions about being there to begin with, considering where he left things with her when last they spoke. In her condition, there’s no way he can treat her the way he had before. “Hey Bex.” He says, as he walks over to her bedside and takes a hold of her hand. Her eyes bloodshot and puffy and the streaks of tears still fresh on her cheeks, she looks broken. “I’m so sorry…” He starts, before she quickly interrupts him. “Don’t. I’ve cried too much already and I can’t handle you feeling sorry for me, besides, I should be apologizing to you.”

“Shut up. You’ve been through a lot, Bex. It’s okay to lose it. Look, you’ve been through enough and I realized something last night. Believe it or not, you can thank Chrissie for that. She forgave me, forgave Aaron, she knows there’s more important things than holding on to the past and she’s right. If she can put it behind her and focus on what’s really important, then so can I. I get that you had your reasons and even though you hurt me, it’s in the past and I don’t want to hold on to it. I forgive you Bex.”

Rebecca breaks down into tears again. “I’m so sorry Robert, I really am, I just…”

“Really Bex, it’s in the past, let’s move past it.”

“Thank you, Robert.”

 

 

 

 


	10. Get Together

 

Christmas is only a week away and though he should be at home, in bed, enjoying his holiday, he only finds himself in old territory. With Rebecca in recovery, Chrissie had practically begged Robert for help at Home Farm, she claimed she only wanted some help to get everything closed out for the holiday and remaining winter season, but based on the paperwork and legal documents he saw Chrissie filing, he could tell she was up to something more. Though Robert had his reservations when she asked, Aaron’s good nature pushed him to help her out. It is one of the many reasons he loves Aaron so much, his heart, his willingness to help others in need, even the Whites.

Since he was there to help, he didn’t want to get too involved, didn’t want to pry, but eventually his curiosity finally got the best of him, so he had to ask exactly what he was doing there and what she was up to. “You off your head?” Robert asks, completely surprised by the offer just made to him. “No Robert, I can assure you that I am most certainly not _off my head._ ” She replies with a grin on her face. Chrissie was pleased with herself for actually managing to get one over on him. With his jaw still hanging in surprise, he pauses for a moment and begins to pace about, gob smacked. Since the night of the accident, they have made leaps and bounds reconciling, but never in a million years would he have expected this kind of surprise. “But…I can’t accept that, Chrissie. It’s too much, how could I possibly accept that?”

“Yeah, I…we thought you might say that. Trust me, Rebecca and I thought this through and decided on it together.”

“Chrissie, how could you possibly expect me to take Home Farm…the whole business.”

“You know that the accident changed everything. It’s made us look at what’s really important and after all that, the most important thing to us is family. Even without Home Farm we had already amassed a large family fortune. Not that I’m bragging.” She jokes trying to lighten the mood before continuing. “Then there is also Dad’s life insurance on top of that, Robert. We are set for a lifetime…or two. Trust me when I say we don’t need Home Farm, and if we are being honest here, as much as it may hurt my ego to say this, you pretty much made the business. You grew it by thirty percent on your first year alone and you doubled that the following year. We never would have admitted it back then, but you _were_ the business. You deserve it, plus you can consider it an early wedding present for when you and Aaron finally decide to tie the knot.”

“Chrissie, I…I don’t know what to say. Still, I don’t think I can accept it. A couple of years ago, yeah, in a heartbeat, but now? I have everything I need, everything I could possibly want.”

“Robert, please don’t be an idiot. This isn’t some trick and there are no strings attached. We will be gone by the end of the week and we would just rather leave the business in good hands. We want it to go with someone who it would mean something to. We couldn’t think of anyone better, besides, you saw the paperwork so don’t play dumb. You know I’ve already transferred ownership…listen, if at the end of the day you don’t want it, you can do with it as you please. Sell it off, give it away, burn it to the ground. It’s up to you.”

“Chrissie, I…thank you.” Robert says leaning in for a hug.

________

 

Aaron shoots off the couch screaming at the top of his lungs, he’s screaming at the microphone, but screaming no less. He’s known for being a sore loser and Liv had just obliterated him at their match. She’s been hanging around with Lachlan lately, typically tagging along with Robert when he makes his way up to Home Farm to help Chrissie. Video games being his form of entertainment, Lachlan has been teaching her how to play and clearly, she’s taken to it rather well and today is no exception. Liv had asked Robert if she could join him when he left for Home Farm in the morning and sure enough she and Lachlan were challenging Aaron and Adam to a few online matches shortly after. Aaron whines about his controller not working properly, making excuses as to why Liv has completely wiped the floor with him in four out of the five matches they’ve played. Adam looks over at him and chuckles. “You are such a sore loser, ya know that, bro?” He says throwing crisps at him while Aaron simply looks back at him and smirks before turning his attention back to the microphone, back to Liv. “Seriously, you two are clearly cheating.” Adam adds, asking for another match, both Liv and Lachlan are happy to oblige. This time around things are looking up for Aaron and Adam as they take the lead and are on the verge of winning the match.

Their luck runs out when Robert walks through the door, the look of concern on his face immediately makes Aaron shoot off the couch, leaving behind his control and the match. “Ah Rob, horrible timing!” Adam yells out. “Hey man, can you give us a moment? There’s something we need to talk about.” Robert asks, looking at Adam before apologizing for the interruption. Aaron quickly turns to look at Adam and nods towards the door, hoping he’ll take the hint. Adam quickly informs Liv that they are stepping down for the moment, before letting himself out, giving Aaron and Robert some privacy.

Aaron watches as Robert paces back and forth between the kitchen and living room, he’s not sure what to make of this, he can see the concern in his face and is trying not to worry. Robert looks up at him a couple of times, like he’s about to say something before he stops and goes back to pacing. Aaron finally speaks up. “Robert. Whatever it is, you can tell me, just please tell me. You’re starting to worry me.”

“I’m so sorry babe, I didn’t mean to worry you.”

“Did you just call me babe?”

“What?”

“You just called me babe.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, it must have just slipped out. I was trying to think, didn’t realize I said it aloud.” Robert says, a flush of red creeping up his face.

Aaron smiles back at him. “Don’t worry about it…so what is it? What’s going on?”

“First, I just want you to know that I love you and that you mean everything to me. With that said, you are now looking at the President, C.E.O., owner, whatever you want to call it, of Home Farm.”

“What?”

“Chrissie has fully signed it, all of it, over to me. No strings attached…nothing. She called it an early wedding gift. Before she told me she had already signed it over to me, I turned her down. I don’t want you to think that I was trying for it, it’s not who I am anymore. You know that the money doesn’t matter, I already have everything I could ever want.”

“Serious?” Is all Aaron responds with.

“I promise, Aaron. You’re all that matters, I…”

Aaron notices the slight panic in Robert’s eyes, he can tell he’s worried he’s messed up. “Robert, it’s okay…I believe you. You don’t have to convince me. I trust you. I just can’t believe that she would just hand it to you.”

“Yeah, she completely blindsided me. Never would have expected it, but they decided to leave for good. She said there’s too many bad memories here and after the baby and Lawrence, they decided to leave in a hurry. They’ll be gone by the end of the week and they wanted to leave it in good hands.”

“So, you know what you’re going to do with it? I’ll support you no matter what.”

“You mean, you’re okay with it? I promise you, I didn’t ask for it.”

“Will you get off it already, I meant it when I said I believe you. Robert, I love you, we’ll be married soon, so whatever you decide I’m in.”

To his surprise, Robert rushes at him picking him up in a hug. He laughs, as Robert spins while holding him up. “Have you been hitting the gym lately? When did you get this strong?” He asks before Robert’s lips are on his. The kiss is tender and Aaron simply melts into the embrace, sinking his head into the nook of his neck and breathing him in. “Shut up.” Robert says lifting Aaron up further in the air. Aaron wraps his legs around Robert’s waist and nods to the spiral staircase as he grins at him. “You dirty little grease monkey.” He teases, as he makes for the stairs. Aaron’s not quite sure how Robert managed to make it up the stairs carrying him, but he did it with ease, no less. “That was so fucking hot, Robert.” Aaron says, as he claims Robert’s lips, his tongue exploring Robert’s mouth, as he begins to grind his hips into him, he wants to make sure Robert can feel how hard he is, wants him to know how turned on he is.

They’ve barely made it into their bedroom when Robert puts him down, much to his disappointment, he’s actually surprised just how much it turned him on to have Robert hold him up that way. “You liked that, didn’t you?” As if reading his mind, Robert asks with a glint in his eyes and drops to his knees unbuckling Aarons belt and simultaneously pulling his trousers and boxers off. Aaron throws his head back moaning in pleasure as he feels warm wetness of Robert’s mouth around his dick, his knees nearly give before he feels Robert’s hands on his hips steadying him, keeping him in place. Feeling his hands on him is something Aaron will never get tired of, a single touch from Robert sends chills down his spine, leaving goosebumps in its trail, makes his mind lose all thought. He’s so lost in the moment that he didn’t even realize that Robert is now standing in front of him, stripping himself before he finally reaches for the hem of Aaron’s shirt, lifting it off him. He takes a moment to admire him, now that he’s fully undressed and licks his lips, before pulling him into an embrace and runs his hands down Aaron’s back until he’s cupping his ass, he gently squeezes it as he plays with the crease and revels in the moans coming from him. Pushing against him, Aaron can feel that Robert is just as hard as he is, he grinds his hips so their engorged dicks rub against each other’s and feels the wetness rubbing against his stomach, precum dripping from both of them.

“Can we take this to the be…” He begins to ask, before Robert interrupts him, lifting him up and instructing him to wrap his legs around his waist, there’s something desperate in his eyes, something erotic in how he’s ravaging him. This is moving a bit faster than usual, Robert likes to take his time, but Aaron can tell that Robert wants him now and he’s not going to stop him, not when he wants it every bit as much. Robert pulls back from the kissing to quickly spit into his palm as he holds him steady with a single arm, he reaches back down and Aaron can tell he’s rubbing the spit on his dick preparing himself. It’s only seconds before he feels Robert easing his way into him. That slight sting he feels at first makes him moan in pleasure, having Robert inside him makes him feel complete in a way he never knew possible, makes him desperate for more. “Oh God, Robert. Fuck me.” He moans out, before he feels Robert thrusting into him. Every thrust getting faster, harder, getting him closer to release. They hold their gaze, nothing else in the world matters, them, their connection is all there is. The look in Robert’s eyes full of want and love, the moans coming from him almost animalistic, his thrusts going deeper and harder, Aaron recognizes all of those tells. He knows Robert is about to come and knowing that pushes him over, he throws his head back gasping as his orgasm takes over, his body trembling as feels the streams of cum release from him, shooting all over Robert’s stomach and chest. “Oh, fuck I’m going to cum, Aaron.” Robert pants out as he cums inside of him. Aaron can feel the tensing, can feel the hot streams unloading into him, the shaking in Robert’s body as he gives his final thrusts shouting out his name as he cums. He feels dazed and his face is tingling as Robert walks them over to the bed and collapses landing on top of him.

“I don’t deserve you, Aaron.” Robert says, with a vulnerable look in his face. Seeing that look in his face drives a pang of guilt in Aaron’s heart, he can see it in his eyes, that after everything they’ve been through, after all this time, Robert still doesn’t feel worthy of his love…of him. “No, Robert, I think it’s the other way around. _I don’t deserve you._ You are the most amazing man in the world and I wish that for even a minute, that you could see that. Yeah, you’ve made some mistakes in your life, but so have I, hell…I’ve made worse and you still love me, despite all of it. You’ve always been there for me, you’ve always put me first. It took me a long time to realize it, to accept it, but I know you love me and I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you what you mean to me, because you deserve it.” He says taking Robert’s face into his palms, kissing him.

 

________

 

_CHRISTMAS DAY_

 

It seems like it’s becoming a regular thing where the Mill is becoming the place for family gatherings, they pretend like it’s only because it’s the biggest place out of everyone’s, but secretly they love it. They love having all their family coming together in their home, the place they built together. They built it to set roots after all, to give Liv a real home, to be a proper little family. Having their loved ones there only felt right. Robert and Liv had spent all morning and some of last night slaving in the kitchen preparing food, she pretended to protest but both Robert and Aaron can tell she enjoys it. They can see she’s taken an interest into cooking and baking so much so that she was left in charge of desert for today’s celebration. As they busy themselves in the kitchen finishing up, Gabby chats Liv’s ear off on her situation with Jacob while Bernice walks about with a wine glass in hand pretending to help, though everyone knows she only showing off the engagement ring on her finger, which she occasionally clinks against her wine glass. Robert rolls his eyes and Andy spots it as he looks over from the living room, he shakes his head as he lets out a laugh and calls Bernice over, getting a thankful nod from Robert.

Adam sits on one of the chairs in the living room with Victoria on one of his legs as they laugh at something Andy just said. Aaron is playing with Leo while Paddy and Rhona have a conversation with Chas, Jason, Diane, and Doug off to the side of the living room, as all the kids have taken over the TV and video games. Noah, Sarah, Jack, Samson, April, and Kyle all take turns playing one another. Cain, Moira, Debbie, Zack, Lisa, Belle, Charity, Marlon, and Sam joke about as they enjoy the free drinks that Chas provided while Lydia tries her best to clean up after them. Once everything is ready everyone gathers in the kitchen around the dining table Robert and Aaron recently got, the old round one became too small once they started having family gatherings there at the Mill, the new one was a long rectangular one that could extend even further to sit even more. It was a tight fit, but they could all fit, fortunately the kids all decided to eat at the coffee table in the living room leaving extra space for the adults at the table.

With all the adults gathered and seated at the table, Robert stands to make a toast, thanking everyone for being there. “First, I just want to thank you all for being here, it means a lot to us to have you all here.” He says nodding to Aaron and Liv. “Second, I wanted to congratulate my brother on his very recent engagement. Bernice, you better be good to him.” He says raising his glass. “Cheers.” Once they’re done with tea they all gather in the living room for coffee and desert, as the kids start passing around presents, Liv walks in with two decadent looking deserts, a coffee cake and cheesecake for everyone to pick from. “Liv, these are cracking.” Robert says with pride, he’d spent hours teaching her how to make them weeks ago, but these were all her and they look every bit as good as anything he’d make. By the end of the night, Liv’s deserts were a hit every bit as much as the presents and half of the guests had passed out drunk. Adam and Victoria having to spend the night in the guest room while the others were carried away by their significant others.

 

________

 

_NEW YEAR’S EVE_

After all the excitement from Christmas, Robert had insisted on having a more intimate New Year’s at home. He insisted on only having immediate family there and eventually gave in to having a few more when Aaron pushed. “If I had my way it would just be me and you really. We can send Liv off to Chas’ or Vic’s, then we can really enjoy ourselves.” Said Robert, giving Aaron that smug grin he’s famous for. The same grin that makes Aaron weak in the knees. “You keep this up, that might just be what we do.” Aaron teased back before biting his lower lip. “Playing dirty, are we?” He replies in return, before poking at Aaron’s stomach tickling him. Liv looks over at them from the living room rolling her eyes and making jokes about them emotionally scarring her before shutting the TV off and letting them know that everyone will be arriving soon. “I guess I’ll get everything sorted since you two are too busy playing with each other.” She jokes, heading for the kitchen and pantry to gather snacks and drinks.

Half an hour before the countdown to New Year’s, everyone gathers in the living room; the TV is playing countdowns around the world and everyone in the living room cheers every time another region hits New Year’s. Aaron, Liv, Victoria, Adam, Chas, Jason, Diane, Doug, Andy, Bernice, and Gabby all cheer for the next one as Robert excuses himself for a moment, heading upstairs, before momentarily returning with an envelope. “Before we ring in the bell I wanted to surprise my beautiful fiancé with an early birthday present.” He announces, handing the envelope over to Aaron.

“What’s this?” Aaron asks.

“Why don’t you open it and find out.”

As quickly as he opens the envelope a huge smile spreads across his face. “Are you serious?!” He asks with excitement in his voice.

“Yeah. We never made it last time, so I thought I’d take you for real this time.” As soon as he says it, he sees the hint of guilt in Aaron’s eyes and regrets having said it that way.

“ROBERT, THAT’S AMAZING!” He shouts showing the ticket to Vegas to everyone, part of the reaction was genuine and part of it was exaggerated. He’s truly excited about going to Vegas, but Aaron is every bit as good at reading Robert as Robert is at reading him. He knows that Robert saw the guilt in his eyes and he’s trying to play it off.

“What? No way…can I come this time?” Liv asks as a joke, just like last time, but secretly hoping for a yes.

“Aaron, can you look under your ticket?” Robert asks nodding at Aaron’s hands.

Realizing there’s a second ticket below his, Aaron flips to it and sees Liv’s name printed on it. He holds it out to her so she can see as he looks back at Robert. “Are you sure you want to take her, she’s probably just going to get in the way.” He jokes making a face at her.

Once she sees her name on the ticket, she completely ignores Aaron’s joke, launching herself at Robert, wrapping her arounds around his waist for a hug. He leans down into the hug and whispers something into her ear that no one else manages to catch and she rapidly nods her head agreeing to whatever it is he said. Robert looks back over at Aaron. “Am I the best fiancé or what?” Aaron leans in, giving him a kiss, a kiss that lasts longer than they realize. “Enough with the snogging, there are other people here.” Victoria jokes. “Besides the countdown is about to start, so you can go back to it after we ring in the New Year.” With that they all turn their attention back to the TV and watch as the countdown begins.

“10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, HAPPY NEW YEAR!” Everyone cheers, as Robert takes Aaron’s face into his palms and kisses him.

 

________

 

Robert lays in bed reading a book to wind down, while Aaron undresses down to his boxers for bed. “So, what was that with Liv?” Aaron asks. “What do you mean?” Robert replies, playing coy with him.

“What did you whisper to her?”

Robert grins, looking at him. “That’s between Liv and me, besides you should be packing, you do know that we’re flying out later today right? You need to pack and get in bed so you can get at least a couple of hours of sleep.” He says before Aaron jumps on top of him grinning. Robert closes his book and sets it on his nightstand so he can give Aaron his full attention. “I still can’t believe you did this. Honestly, I don’t think I’m going to be able to sleep. I’m too excited, I feel like I’m buzzing.” He says with a cocked brow. “I think I’d rather thank you for the early birthday present.” He says with a grin on his face before biting his lower lip, he knows exactly how motivate Robert.


	11. Vegas Baby!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron finally gets his birthday in Vegas and it's full of surprises.

_JANUARY_

 

_Monday Jan 1 st _

Aaron was right about not being able to sleep, he spent a couple of hours running around checking the weather in Vegas for the week and trying to find the right outfits to pack. Robert joked about the hot weather and Aaron’s closet full of strictly black clothing. “Doesn’t matter what the temperature is, all you wear is black so you’re going to be extremely hot regardless.” Aaron responds by throwing a pair of boxers at his face. “Why are you so calm anyway? We need to leave in a few hours and you still haven’t even started packing.” He tells Robert.

“Don’t need to, I’ve already packed. This was a surprise to you, not me. I’m all ready for trip.” Robert’s respond elicits a second pair of boxers to the face, he laughs before he pulls Aaron on top of him and touching his forehead to Aaron’s, holding their gaze on each other Robert brushes a thumb across Aaron’s cheek before placing a chaste kiss on his lips. They savor the tender moment, a moment they’d live in for a lifetime if they could, as it seems that everything has been a whirlwind since before Christmas. Between the accident that claimed Lawrence’s life as well as Rebecca’s baby, Home Farm being handed over to Robert, the Whites leaving Emmerdale, to Christmas and New Year’s, it seems that moments like this are few and between. Unfortunately, the moment is fleeting as the doorbell rings. “Who on earth could that be? It’s not even five in the morning.” Aaron asks, confused. “It’s probably Chas.” Robert responds giving him a second peck on his lips. Aaron pulls back still confused and asks, “how would you know?” Robert smirks at him, clearly there’s something he’s been holding back. “Probably because I asked her to be here by Five.” Furrowing his brow Aaron asks. “You what? What for?”

“Because…she’s coming with.” Robert says beaming a smile at Aaron.

“You serious, why?”

“Well who do you think is going to watch Liv while we’re having fun?”

“But this must have cost you a fortune.”

“You’re worth every penny.”

“But…”

“Are you just going to leave your Mum waiting out there?”

Aaron laughs as he heads for the door. “I’ll go let Mum in, you should probably make sure Liv gets packed.”

Aaron is all smiles with hearts in his eyes every time he looks at Robert even after the fourteen-hour flight from Leeds to Las Vegas. Robert had tried to get him to sleep during the flight so they were rested when they arrived allowing them to explore a bit after checking into their Hotel, but he found himself too restless and full of excitement. He spent a couple of hours trying to sleep before he gave up and began flipping through channels on the inflight telly looking for something to watch eventually settling for a Game of Thrones marathon. It’s not really his thing, but anything Robert loves is something he’s willing to try. He’s been watching a few episodes when he hears a whisper besides him, “what are you doing? You’re not supposed to watch that without me.” Robert says with a grin on his face before he reaches over and places a soft kiss on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, did I wake you?” Aaron asks, softly, with that same look of complete bliss he’s been giving him all day. “Not really, never been good at sleeping during flights, besides there’s something I’ve always wanted to try.” He says, lust in his eyes, as he gently nods towards the loo eliciting a sly smile from Aaron. “Give it a couple of minutes, then you can come join me in there.” He whispers with that signature smug grin that makes Aaron weak in the knees.

Even though public displays of affection have always made him a bit uncomfortable, he finds himself not caring, he held on to Robert’s hand from the moment they left the Mill until they landed in Vegas only letting go when it was necessary. Chas and Liv joked several times about how much they made them want to _vom_ and they got plenty of “you guys are such a cute couple,” from people who only gushed over them even more when they heard their accents. “Like you two need people stroking your egos anymore?” Chas laughs out as they make it to conveyer belt to pick up their luggage and heading towards the exit. “Hey, look! Aaron, that guy over there is holding a sign with your name on it!” Liv tugs at Aaron’s arm before he turns over to look at Robert. “You didn’t think I’d forget about the limo, did you?” Robert says waiving the chauffer over. “Mr. Dingle, I’m glad to see you and your family have made it here safely. Welcome to Las Vegas. Let me take your bags for you and if you’d all please follow me I’ll take you to your ride.”

At Liv’s request, their chauffer took his time on the drive to the Mirage so they had time to take it all in. It was a bit before midnight and this late at night Las Vegas is a spectacle to behold. The lights, the sounds, the atmosphere, there’s a drum of excitement in the air that leaves them all in awe. Both Liv and Aaron sticking out through the sunroof gawking at all the hotels and their attractions, laughing like maniacs as Robert and Chas sit below shaking their heads. “I don’t know how you do it luv?” Chas laughs out. “Do what?” Robert replies. “Put up with them twenty-four seven.” She says smiling back at him before continuing, “Thank you, Robert. Thank you for loving my boy the way you do. He’s had such a rough life and he’s never been happier than he is with you.” Robert nods back with a smile on his face.

“You don’t think he’s going to freak out, do you?” He whispers

“You, daft? Of course, he’s not. He’s going to love…”

“Robert! Look, is that it? Is that where we’re staying?” Liv shouts down from outside the sunroof.

Robert looks back out the window in tune with the loud drum of music and bangs right before the geysers of water start to blast out of the pool of water, almost as if timed perfectly for their arrival, the attraction at the Mirage has started and the limo drives by slow enough to enjoy the show. The blasts of water and flames blasting along to the dramatic music as it rolls into its conclusion as the Volcano erupts in a massive blast of fire and lights. Liv and Aaron scream at the top of their lungs, mesmerized by show, the drop back below once the music stops signaling the end of the show. “Robert, did you see it!?” Liv asks as Robert nods back smiling at her.

As the limo comes to a stop in front of the Mirage Aaron reaches for Robert’s hand lacing their fingers together as they step out and make their way towards the back to collect all their bags before they make their way in. Still awestruck by their surroundings as they make their way through to the check in desks. Aaron nudges Robert his shoulder against Robert’s, getting his attention.

“So, this is going to be a bit weird no?” He asks.

“What is?” Robert replies.

“Sharing a room with them. What if we wanna…” he says wagging his eyebrows. “You know.”

Robert chuckles at him. “We’re not sharing a room with them, you idiot. I got them a separate room.” He replies with a smile on his face.

After checking in they snake their way through the casino making their way to the elevator banks that will take them up to their rooms. There’s row after row of slot machines, blinking lights, and people walking about hoping to score big, it’s unlike anything they’ve experienced before. “So, I know you guys all probably want to explore a bit but we have a very early and very long day tomorrow. We should go settle in and then Chas, you and Liv can to ours and we can order some room service before we get some shut eye.” Robert says as they wait for their elevator. “How early, and what do you mean we?” Liv quickly objects. “We need to be out of here by six in the morning and we are doing tomorrow like a proper little family, no questions. Besides you are not going to want to miss it, trust me.” He replies with wide eyes and a grin.

 

_Tuesday Jan 2 nd_

“Seriously, the buffet?” Robert asks incredulously.

“What’s wrong with the buffet, not posh enough for you?” Aaron jokes in return. “Come on, it’s just downstairs. Means we can finish getting ready and just meet Mum and Liv down there for a quick bite before we head out, and by the way, where are we heading to anyway?”

“No, no, the buffet is fine if that’s what you want and nice try but already told you it’s a surprise.”

Aaron laces his fingers through Robert’s and starts to make for the door, but Robert pulls him back and shoves him against the wall before dropping on his knees, keeping his eyes on Aaron’s, grinning.

They leave their room fifteen minutes later than planned and head down to the buffet where Chas and Liv are already waiting for them. Robert rushes them through breakfast much to all their annoyance only stopping to answer his phone. “Yes. Okay. We’ll be out in just a couple of minutes.” As he ends the call he looks over to Aaron, Liv, and Chas. “Looks like our ride is here…lets go.” He says smiling. Having arrive so late in the day the night before they didn’t quite experience the heat that looms outside, as they step outside the Mirage doors they welcome the cool mist that sprays from above them, it appears that most of the buildings have water systems that occasionally spray a cooling mist to keep everyone a bit more comfortable in this heat. Robert and Chas chuckle at Aaron and Live dressed in predominantly black. “You pair are going to absorb all the heat, we really should think about getting ya something not black. We can always do a bit of shopping.” Chas jokes before she notices their chauffer from last night awaiting them. “Oh, two days in a row. You better be careful Robert or you are going to spoil us.” She adds.” Robert gives her a soft grin and nods at the limo for them to hop in. Liv and Chas go in first with Aaron waving Robert in next, taking his time to check him out, paying extra attention to his ass and legs. It’s not often Robert wears shorts so Aaron wants to savor the moment.

“So, are you going to tell us where we’re going then or not, Robert?” Chas asks.

“No, way. It’s a surprise, besides he needs to get used to it because it’s not the only surprise he’s getting this week.” He says nodding his head towards Aaron.

“Are you serious? But you know I don’t like surprises.” Aaron protests, smiling.

“Tough, because you’re going to love…”

“No way! Is that a helicopter?” Liv asks as the limo makes its way into the private heliport.

“You didn’t!” Aaron shouts at Robert, with excitement in his voice.

“Well, you did say you always wanted to do a helicopter tour through the Grand Canyon, didn’t you?”

Aaron leans over wrapping his arms around Robert and places a small kiss on his cheek thanking him, all the while Liv and Chas make faces. “Think I’m going to vom.” Liv jokes.

An hour later all four of them find themselves properly strapped inside the helicopter as it begins to ascend, both Liv and Chas looking a bit jittery with nerves while Aaron laughs at them and Robert strikes up a conversation with their tour guide. _Leave it to Robert to be entertained by the least interesting part of this tour_. Aaron thinks to himself smiling as he looks at him.

The tour starts with a marvelous view of the Las Vegas strip, not quite as spectacular as it would be a night time, but sight to be hold no less especially at this distance and height. They all look out in wonder as they get clear views of the dessert terrain along their path. Soon enough they begin to see the Hoover Dam in the distance, even this far away they can see how monumental it is, all that concrete holding back all that water, a testament to the engineering behind it. Their guide drones on giving them a small history to the Hoover Dam from when it was built and how many people it took to how much water is held back. The tour path takes them past the Hoover Dam and Lake Mead, the largest water reservoir in the United States in terms of water capacity, serving water to the states of Arizona, California, and Nevada. As Chas, Liv, and Aaron all gawk out the window Robert seems to be more entertained by the random facts their guide spouts out, garnering a chuckle from Aaron and Liv. As amazing as the Hoover Dam and Lake Mead have been to see there is no comparison to the sight of the Grand Canyon as they arrive, even Robert loses all interest in what the guide is saying once it’s in full view. The expanse alone is jaw dropping.

All four of them are mesmerized, watching in awe at the canyon below them, as their guide continues to drop information on the Grand Canyon, but they can’t be bothered to look away. Upon their arrival into the canyon, they slow down and begin to descend. The descend is nearly 4,000 feet below the rim of the canyon and goes into a private landing site in the heart of the Hualapai Indian territory where they are greeted for a special feast with the tribe. Every step of this leaving Aaron even more speechless than the last, he keeps glancing over at Robert only to smile, unable to find the words to express what he’s feeling. He’s never been great at voicing his feelings, neither of the them have, but it’s one of the things that always hurt their relationship and he’s done with that. “Robert. This has been amazing…you have been amazing.” He takes the opportunity to get soppy while Chas and Liv joke around. The feast lasts a couple of hours ending in a toast from Chas to _her boys_.

 

_Wednesday Jan 3 rd_

The bright and warm light coming in through the split in the curtains wakes Aaron from his sleep, his body sore from last night’s activities that stretched out for a couple of hours. As soon as they made it back to their room after a long day with the tour and some light shopping afterwards he couldn’t resist it anymore, he needed Robert, he needed to show him how he felt. What they shared had almost been primal, rough, yet tender. Robert spent the night flipping and tossing him, everything they both wanted, luckily, they didn’t have to be up too early. As he stands from the bed he walks over to the window and opens the curtains to see Volcano out below, perfect view from their room to catch the attraction show at any given moment if they’d like. He looks back down at the bed looking at the beautiful man still laying in it, his fiancé, sprawled out on the bed wearing nothing at all. He bites down on his lower lip. “What are you looking at?” Robert grins back up at him. “This beautiful bloke who should probably hurry out before my fiancé gets back.” He jokes before Robert quickly sits up and yanks Aaron down on top of him. “Cheeky git.” Robert replies as he pokes at Aaron’s sides. “Take it easy, yeah. Pretty sore from last night.” He says laughing. “We should probably take a quick shower before we head out.”

As they arrive downstairs to the buffet they find Chas and Liv waiting on them again. “Late again I see.” Liv teases. “Remind me not to bring you next time, huh.” Robert teases back. “Say, why don’t you and Aaron go ahead and grab us a table.” He adds. As Aaron and Liv make for the seating area Robert turns back to Chas. “Everything still on, yeah? Everyone good?” He asks quietly. “Yeah, luv. Everything’s good. You just make sure you keep him busy and we’ll keep everything on track.”

After a quick breakfast Robert takes Aaron’s hand and leads him back out the front where their chauffer awaits them. “You going to tell me where we’re going this time?” He asks Roberts, who simply smiles and shakes his head. “Babe, please, at least give me a hint.” He pleads with those beautiful clear blue eyes that just slay Robert. “I love it when you call me that…but it isn’t going to work. Now get it and trust me when I say you’re going to _love this_.” He gives him a quick kiss to the lips and pushes him into the limo.

The drive isn’t too long and within half an hour they begin pulling into their destination, anxious to know where they are Aaron rolls his window down to look at where they are. “NO!” He shouts before he pulls back into the limo. “Is this what I think it?” He asks with a massive grin on his face. Robert smiles nods. No sooner has the limo stopped that Aaron opens the door and flies out, pacing outside looking at the race tracks. “Come on, we have to do a tutorial and a guided lap before we get a chance to drive a few laps ourselves.” Robert says mirroring the same grin Aaron has plastered on his face. The tutorial is fairly short and the guided lap serves to show them how the track works, where the turns are the sharpest and how they should handle them, they make note of everything they’ll need to keep themselves safe and head back so they can select a car. The moment both Aaron and Robert spot it, they immediately fall in love. A solid black Lamborghini Aventador, the thing is built for speed and looks. It goes from 0-60 miles per hour in 2.9 seconds and it’s all theirs for twelve laps. “Well, birthday boy, you ready for this?” Robert asks, lightly smacking Aaron ass as he points him towards the Lamborghini. “You kidding me? I’ve been dreaming about this for years. Let’s go.” Aaron takes to it like its second nature to him, he goes gentle at first to get a handle on both the car and the track, but after the first lap he’s gotten it down. He feels like he’s ready, and starting the second lap, he floors it, screaming his lungs out. Robert barely looks at the track, hardly able to keep his eyes off Aaron, seeing the joy in his eyes makes his heart swell in his chest. Aaron’s smile and excitement only intensifies with every new lap and Robert’s joy at watching him follows in suit. Aaron let’s Robert take over for a few laps, but Robert relinquishes control shortly after. “You’re the birthday boy, this is for you babe.” He says smiling at Aaron. By the last lap he’s fully gotten the track down and really floors it, handling every curve like a pro, accelerating and decelerating, laughing his heart out as they come to finish line. As they walk back to their limo Aaron takes Robert’s hand and leans over to whisper into his ear. “I’m so fucking horny after that, we need to get back to our room, like now.”

 

_Thursday Jan 4 th_

Robert wakes with Aaron’s head on his shoulder, their legs tangled, he realizes that it was for the best that he got them a separate room from Chas and Liv instead of the villa he had originally planned on. They’ve been having too much fun in the bedroom and they’ve been too loud, sharing a villa would have been scarring for everyone. He kisses the top of Aaron’s head and breathes him in, smiling, before he softly chuckles, thinking of how Aaron wasn’t kidding when he’d said the racing turned him on. Aaron had not been able to keep his hands off him from the moment they left the track to the second they made it up to their room, much like the previous night, they’d spent a couple of hours exploring each other on nearly every surface of their suite. There were no major plans for the day other than lounging around the pools and catching a show later in the night, after everything that he had surprised Aaron with, he’d finally agreed to a Cirque du Soleil show, to appease him. Robert smiles as he hears Aaron groaning awake, he breaths him in again. “Morning sleepy head. We should probably hop in the shower so we can go meet Liv and Chas for brekkie.” He whispers into his head. “Do we have to? Can we just stay in bed?” Aaron groans back.

Soon enough Robert finds himself being pinned against the tiled wall of the shower, his face pressed against it, as Aaron takes him from behind…not quite the quick shower he had in mind. By the time they make it down to the buffet Liv and Chas are already eating their breakfast. Liv just looks up at them and rolls her eyes, laughing.  “So, Robert, what are the plans for today?” Chas asks coyly.

“No plans for today. We are just going to lounge out by the pools and get some sun, but we do have a show tonight if you two are interested.”

“Yeah, I think we’ll skip that. Liv and I have some more shopping to do.”

“Suit yourself.”

After their breakfast, they go their separate ways. Chas and Liv off to shop while Robert and Aaron make their way to the pools. As they near the exits of the hotel leading to the pools Aaron’s looking around when he stops in his tracks. “Hey, you see that bird over there? Does that look like Vic to you?” Aaron asks him to busy trying to get a better look that he misses the quick panic in Robert’s face. “You’re off your head if you think that looks anything like Vic.” Luckily for him, Aaron quickly loses track of her and Robert drags him on.

The heat isn’t as bad today as it’s been so far this week and there’s a bit of cloud coverage as they lounge around soaking up some sun. Robert leans back on his chair reading a book while Aaron relaxes listening to music. After the hectic last couple of days, it was nice to have some time to relax, and nothing’s more relaxing than laying back and reading a good book, at least for Robert. He’s deep in his book when Aaron grabs his attention.

“Hey.” Aaron sits up looking at him. Robert abruptly stops and marks his spot on the book and sets it aside, before Aaron continues. “These last couple of days have been amazing. Don’t get me wrong, but how can you afford all of this. I know you stuck on those investments but this all must have cost you a fortune.”

“What can I say? I like to treat my boyfriend.” He jokes.

“No, seriously.” Aaron says, his eyes straying to the side.

“Hold on. Were you just checking out that bloke?”

“You off your head!”

“I saw the way your eyes followed him.”

“You jealous?”

“Me, jealous? Of that bloke? He’s got nothing on me.”

“You are so smug…” Aaron smiles at Robert. “And I can tell you’re trying to change the subject. You trying to hide something? How much did all this cost?”

Robert sighs as his shoulders slump. Clearly Aaron is on to him, knows him too well. “You’re right, it did cost a fortune, but you’re worth every bit of it.”

“Robert.”

He sighs again in defeat. “I wanted to wait until after your birthday to give you the news. I didn’t want to take away from your moment.”

“What is it?”

“Home Farm…I sold it. I meant it when I said I didn’t want it. I already had everything I could possible want.”

“You serious?”

“Yeah.”

“How much?”

“We probably shouldn’t be talking numbers out in public, but needless to say…we are officially minted and before you say anything, this wasn’t about money. We can do whatever you want with it, if you want me to throw it all into a pit of fire, I will. You know I will.”

“Robert. It’s okay, I get it. I trust you. Thank you for everything. This has been the best present ever.” Aaron smiles at him as he leans over and places his lips to Robert’s.

_Friday Jan 5 th_

“Morning birthday boy.” Robert whispers as he gently kisses down Aaron’s face from his forehead, to his nose, to his lips. He’d already been up for a while getting a few things ready for the final surprise. “Come on, it’s time to get up.” He says as he stands heading to the bathroom, making sure Aaron can see him walking away fully nude. Aaron groans. “You know I can’t resist that ass.” He says as he gets up and follows. The shower did not last as long as either of them would have liked, but Robert was clearly rushing them. “Why are you in such a hurry?” Aaron asks, with a bit of disappointment in his voice. It’s obvious he wanted more than a quickie.

“Because Chas and Liv have been waiting for us for a few minutes already and I don’t want to be completely rude.”

“So, you saying I’m rude?”

“No. I’m saying if we keep them waiting much longer, we will be.”

“Didn’t stop us yesterday or the day before.” Aaron teases.

Robert grabs him by his hips and pulls him into a kiss. Soft and innocent at first, before he parts Aaron’s lips with his tongue and finally, gently bites his lower lip. “I promise we’ll have some more fun later, but we really need to get going.”

“Fine.” Aaron nearly grumbles in return. “But I’m holding you to that.”

It’s not until they’ve gotten near the banquet halls that Aaron stops, a bit confused. “Wait, where are we going?” Robert gives a small laugh. “I can’t believe I almost got you there without you even noticing.” Aaron just looks at him and shrugs his shoulders, feigning frustration.

“We’re not doing the buffet, not for your birthday. You’re mental if you think I’m going to take you there for your birthday. Come on.” He says as he takes Aaron’s hand and leads him towards a room near the end of the hall and gently pushes him forward.

“SURPRISE!” Everyone cheers as Aaron walks through the doors. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”

In complete shock, Aaron looks around to see Chas, Liv, Paddy, Rhona, Adam, Victoria, Andy, Bernice, Diane and Doug. He takes a quick look back at Victoria and lets out a laugh. “I knew it! I knew I saw you! Robert tried to play it off like I’m crazy.” He nods at Robert. “Yeah, you almost ruined it Vic. You guys were supposed to stay clear.” Robert jokes.

Aaron makes his way around, hugging everyone and thanking them for being there before he returns to Robert’s side. “Are you mental? Did you fly everyone out here just to surprise me?”

“Well…yes and no.” Robert replies, grinning.

“What do you mean?” Aaron asks quirking an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I wanted to surprise you, but no I didn’t fly everyone out here just for this. There’s one more surprise.” He says, reaching for his pocket and pulling out his phone, he starts sliding his finger around trying to pull something up for Aaron to see. “It’s the same one we would have done it in, had we made it last time.” Aaron stares into Robert’s phone and see the image of the chapel Robert had found for them. The one they were going to secretly get hitched in. His eyes tear up and he tries to blink them away, trying to hide them. “You didn’t think I was going to let you outdo me did you, with the proposal?” Robert says smiling.

“Well, I ‘spose. Everyone’s here already right?”

“We don’t have to. It’s okay if you don’t want to.”

“Shut up. Of course, I will do.”

“Of course, you boys do know your still having a full proper wedding back home, yeah?” Chas jokes, though meaning every bit of what she just said.

They all have a few drinks before they all load up into a couple of limos and head out to the chapel.

 

________

 

Aaron and Robert stand facing each other, water in their eyes, as they gaze at each other. Andy and Victoria to Robert’s side, Adam and Paddy to Aaron’s with everyone else seated in front of them. Both Aaron and Robert are lost in emotion as they look into each other’s eyes, everything else, everyone else has faded away. Since they had agreed to Chas’ demand of a full, proper wedding back home, they opted for a quick ceremony here in Vegas. Truth be told, they would have happily done it just between the two of them, just like last time. As the minister continues the ceremony he brings them back from their thoughts as he asks if they would like to say any vows, they were so entranced with each other they almost missed the question. They both look at the minister and give a gentle nod.

After a brief pause Robert begins. “I, Robert Jacob Sugden, take you Aaron Dingle as my wedded husband. I promise to be faithful, to put you first, to keep trying to be a better person for you, because you deserve it.” He says placing the ring on Aarons finger.

Aaron sports a smile stretching from ear to ear as he tries to blink away the tears forming in his eyes. “I, Aaron Dingle, take you Robert Jacob Sugden as my wedded husband. I promise to trust you, to never let you down, and to be the best husband I can be, because _you_ deserve it.” He says, placing the ring on Robert’s finger.

“I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss.” The minster finishes.

Robert reaches for Aaron, taking his face into his hands and kisses him passionately as Aaron holds to his waist, as they break the kiss they rest forehead to forehead looking into each other’s eyes and both simultaneously say “I love you.”


	12. I'm Connor By The Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chance encounter with someone from his past leaves Robert in a bit of shock.

“So, now that we’re minted…how about we get me one of them Lamborghinis?” He glees at Robert. It’s been 2 weeks since they returned from Vegas and Aaron can’t stop talking about it. He also can’t decide what his favorite part of the holiday was, the race track or the wedding. At least that’s what he joked to Robert even though he knows that as much as he loved the track nothing could possibly compare to marrying the love of his life. Robert Jacob Sugden. He could live a hundred lives and know that he would find his way to him in every single one of them. They were meant to be and no one could stand in their way, not anymore.

“Are you serious? That’s how you want to spend some money?” Robert questions raising an eyebrow and doesn’t even let him answer. “Well, if that’s what my beautiful husband wants…” Aaron smiles at him from across the dining table where they sit having breakfast as he takes a piece of his toast and throws it at Robert. The moment the toast hits Robert’s head, Liv chuckles and follows suit, throwing a second piece at him. “You two are cleaning up, if you keep it up, Chas and Leyla will be here soon.”

When Robert first told Chas, he planned on getting married in Vegas she nearly lost it on him. No way was she having her boys getting hitched in Vegas away from their family, away from everyone. Her tune quickly changed when he told her she was coming along, she of course made him promise they’d still do it proper back home, something he quickly regretted. They’d only been back home a single day when she started bringing up the _real wedding_. He rolled his eyes, knowing this would be a losing battle and did the only thing Robert Sugden knew how to do when something’s not going his way, he came up with a plan. “Tell you what Chas. I know how much this means to you, so you can plan the wedding. All of it. Just promise me one thing, Faith touches nothing, not a single thing. We don’t want a repeat of that monstrosity at the pub.”

Chas had spent all of three days planning everything on her own before she gave in and went to Leyla for help. If anyone can help her pull this off, it would be Leyla. Though Robert and Aaron had given her full reign, Chas was still determined to finalize a few things with them. She had completely surprised them with how quickly she and Leyla had managed to get things together, she even managed to get her hands on a _huge surprise_ that she wouldn’t let them in on.

They’d been sitting in the living room, all surrounding the coffee table where Chas and Leyla had set everything up, when Liv came down the spiral staircase and noticed the desperate look in Robert’s face. He was clearly miserable. Aaron, on the other hand didn’t look too bothered. “Hey Rob, are you ready? The place will close soon if we don’t get going.” She asks wide-eyed, slightly raising her brows, hoping he’d take the hint. “Oh, was that today? Liv, I’m sorry, but I don’t think we’re going to make it.” He quickly replied. Yeah, he caught the hint.

“What place? What’s going on?” Aaron asks.

“He was taking me to get some art supplies. I ran out of a couple of things and he’s been promising to take me since we got back from Vegas.” She says, lightly pouting, it’s all she has to do to get her way when it comes to Aaron. Play the wounded puppy and he’s putty in her hands. Aaron sighs looking over to Robert and nods his head towards Liv. “Rob, you go on and take her. I’ll finish up here with Mum and Leyla.” Robert looks back, feigning surprise. “Are you sure? Whatever you decide, I’ll be good with.” Aaron smiles, waving him away. He took the bait.

Robert can’t help himself from laughing out, as they step out. Making their way to his car, he pulls Liv in under his arm and gently ruffles her head. “I’d never in a million years expect that.” He says, grinning at Liv. “Expect what?” She asks, grinning up at him. “That you’d pick me over him.” He says, beaming a smile at her. He says it jokingly, but he can’t help but feel a bit of warmth at the thought, at the possibility, that she truly thinks of him as her brother, even if it’s for a fraction of how she feels for Aaron. “Ugh, get over yourself. You looked miserable. I thought you were about to kill yourself and besides, he actually looked like he was into it, the big softy.” He nods in agreement. “Oh, come on now, you can admit you love me, and yeah, I also noticed that.” He teases and she rolls her eyes, playfully shoving Robert aside.

“So, what do you want to do?” Liv asks.

“Well, first we’re going to have to go get you those supplies, because he’s not stupid. If we come back empty handed, he’s going to know we played him. Afterwards, we can do whatever you want.” Robert says. Liv nods in agreement and they hop in Robert’s car to make the quick trip to Hotten.

Liv took her time in the art store, sure, it was used as a cover to get Robert out, but she wasn’t about to turn down the new supplies and Robert made sure to return the favor when they hit the book store afterwards, taking his time browsing for new reads. Once he’s done messing with her, he gives her a respite and offers to take her on a little shopping spree which she happily agrees to. It’s been a while since Robert and Liv have spent some quality time like this together, yet it feels so natural to them. They take digs at each other every chance they get, same way Robert would with Victoria or Aaron with Liv.

Liv makes fun of nearly everything that Robert would pick out. “That’s hideous.” She claims, over any patterned shirt he picks, floral or not. The only things she doesn’t complaint about are the shirts and Jackets he picks out that have elbow patches, something he takes a mental note of to ask her about. Robert teases Liv on her selection of colors, or lack thereof. “Soon enough people are going to start mistaking you for Aaron if you don’t start wearing some color. Why does everything have to be black?” He says grinning.

No one could possibly guess that they hated each other when they first met, a testament to everything they’ve been through together, as a family. Neither of them truly knowing what they mean to the other. Both growing up feeling unwanted, never feeling like they belonged, even with their own families and yet they now find themselves feeling like everything is right…like they finally belong. They both finally feel at home. Being with Aaron and Liv has made him the happiest he’s ever been and though she wouldn’t admit it, it’s the happiest Liv has ever been as well.

“Rob.” Liv breaks a momentary silence in their sweet moment, as they walk side by side, carrying their bags.

“Yeah?”

“You know…I never did thank you.” Liv says, with a sheepish smile. Just like her brothers, she’s never been one for talking about her feelings.

“For what?” He asks, puzzled.

“For giving me a family, a real one.”

“How’d I do that?”

“Aaron told me you’re the one that found us. Me and Mom. You tracked us down and if it wasn’t for you, he may have never found me…so thanks.” She gently leans into him, before wrapping her arms around him. “And thank you for being you, for making him happy.”

“Liv, you don’t have to thank me for any of that. You two mean the world to me, you know that, right? I don’t know where I’d be without you two.” Robert says, as he gently squeezes into the hug.

They share this tender moment in silence for a minute, before Liv feels Robert tense in place. As she leans back to look at Robert she hears an unfamiliar voice coming from behind her. She turns to see a strange bloke, someone she’s never seen before. Something about him reminds her of Robert, about the same age, blonde hair, even the way he’s dressed. It reminds her a lot of Robert when she first met him. As she looks back to Robert she can see how tense he is, he looks like he’s going to be sick. “Hello Robert. Fancy seeing you here…who’s the kid?”

It takes Robert a moment to collect himself and reply. “This is my sister.”

“Victoria, was it? I thought she’d be older.”

“That’s my other sister.”

“Oh, so are you going to introduce us?”

“No, actually I’m not. We need to get a move on, so if you don’t mind, we’ll be on our way.” He says curtly. As he puts his arm around Liv to lead her away, the man keeping a close eye on his hand as he does, so quickly adds, “I see by the ring, you’re still married. What was her name again…Chrissie?” The moment he said the name, Liv sees the regret in Robert’s face. “No, he’s no longer married to her and not that it’s any of your business, but he’s married to my brother.” She replies, in defense. She feels there’s something off here, Robert doesn’t like this guy and she can tell.

The man almost looks surprised at the new information. He opens his mouth to say something, but quickly stops to take a moment and mull it over before he huffs out. “So, you finally decided to stop living a lie. Wow, can’t say I ever expected that from the Robert Sugden I know.”

Liv can feel Robert further tense and see his fists clenching, she knows for sure that this guy is bad news. “Robert, can we go now? Aaron’s probably waiting on us.” She says, tugging at his arm. “Yeah, he probably is.” He turns one last time and begins walking away, they’ve only made it a few steps when they hear the man shout out. “Robert! We really need to talk, there’s something I need to tell you. You know where to reach me, when you’re ready.”

The ride back home is filled with an awkward silence. Robert seems distant and Liv doesn’t want to push him, but she needs to let him know that she’s there for him. “Are you alright?” She asks softly. It takes a minute for him to answer, he slowly turns to face her and gives her a small smile. A smile she recognizes. The one he uses to hide behind, when he’s pretending like he’s untouchable. “Why wouldn’t I be?” Yeah, now she knows he’s pretending. Something’s wrong and he’s being Robert…he’s trying to take on the world on his own, like he would before, like he has no one to support him.

The thought makes her stomach turn, like she’s going to be sick. It’s the same feeling she had when she found out that Aaron was doing drugs in prison, the way she felt when Aaron had asked her not to tell anyone about it. She didn’t want to feel like she grassed him and now the feeling is back, she doesn’t want to feel like she’s betrayed Robert if she tells Aaron about what happened, about the man they ran into. She knows that he’ll probably ask her not to tell Aaron about it, but after everything that they went through because of Rebecca, she doesn’t want anything or anyone being kept in the dark. This is her family, they are her brothers, and she’s going to have to fight for it, for them, just as they have. She decides to keep him distracted so that hopefully he won’t ask. “So, who was that guy?” She asks, noticing the way he immediately tenses and the way his fists clench on the steering wheel. “No one really. Just some one that I used to know, from way back.” She asks him a few more random questions about the man, that he answers with simple one-word responses, every question seemingly making him tense further. Fortunately, they’ve made it back home and he hasn’t asked.

Robert’s parked the car but hasn’t moved an inch, the ignition is still running and he looks like he’s staring into space. “When’s the last time you saw him or spoke to him?” Liv asks, but Robert just stares out his window unresponsive.

****

**_TAP TAP TAP_ **

Robert is suddenly pulled out of his thoughts by the light tapping on his car’s window, the car that has seen better days, but as the teenage son of a farmer, it’s the only car he could afford. No way could he do any better, maybe one day in the future, but for now, this is what he has. “Hey kid, what are you doing here? You can’t stick around.” The officer sneered at him. “Shit.” He grumbles to himself. He’s almost out of gas and has no idea where to go, he can’t afford to drive around, aimlessly looking for somewhere to park his current home. It’s been 4 weeks since Jack made him leave home. His own father, the one man that was supposed to love and care for him no matter what, had chased him away. He finally got his wish. Finally got what he’s wanted since Robert was 15, maybe even before then.

He was only 15 when his Dad caught him with another lad, a farmhand, a new hire that was helping around the farm. Jack lost it the second he saw them kissing, he immediately sacked the farmhand and landed Robert in the hospital. “I will not have this filth, this sin, in my house!” He yelled as he took a swing at Robert, getting him right in the jaw. As Robert hit the floor, he immediately put his hands up to protect himself from the barrage that descended on him. He cried himself to sleep that night, locked in his room, not sure if any more beatings were coming. He cried over what had happened, cried over the pain. He didn’t know it at the time, he wouldn’t know until he found himself in the hospital making up some story about a bike accident he had gotten into, that he had a fractured jaw and broken wrist. Worst of all, he had to hide it all, hide what he was, hide what Jack had done to him and why.

Jack had already felt betrayed by Robert’s desire to be more than a farmer, he’d already replaced him for all intents and purposes with his adopted brother Andy. Andy, who could do no wrong, had finally gotten everything he could have ever wanted. Knowing what his son was, _disgusting and shameful_ , made it all that much easier to chase him away from his home, from his family, from everything he knew.

Now at 19, he finds himself with nowhere to go, he’s almost out of gas, has little to no money left, and can’t remember the last time he’s had a proper meal. _Things couldn’t possibly get any worse, right?_ He thinks to himself, as he places the key into the ignition and the car he’s been living out of for a couple of weeks finally fails him. He turns the key once, twice, three times and nothing. “FUCK!” He yells as he punches the dashboard. “Sorry kid, but if you can’t move the car, I’m going to have to have it towed.” The officer laments to Robert.

“Mate, sorry to keep you waiting.” They’re suddenly interrupted by a young lad about the same age as Robert. “Is it acting up again?” He asks widening his eyes, trying to give Robert a hint. “Yeah, it’s not starting again.” He replies taking the hint. “Here I’ll help you push it away, there’s a spot up the street where we can park it for now.” The lad wasn’t lying, he really did help him move his car and it was a perfect spot, if not at least a bit hidden where it wouldn’t be noticed, even if it was stranded there for a while.

“So, are you living out of that?” The lad asks.

“No.” Robert quickly answers, pretending to be horrified at the question. The guy simply chuckles at him.

“What’s so funny?”

“The fact that you’re trying to pretend you’re not living out of your car. I can see the stash of your belongings in the back seat…and besides I’ve kind of been watching you for the past week since you got here, well there at that spot back there.”

“What, are you some sort of stalker?” Robert sneers out, aggravated. _Who does this guy think he is?_ He thinks to himself.

“Nah, I’m just homeless. You see that box over there in the alley? Well, that is my current residence.” He says nonchalantly. “It’s not really something to be ashamed of, you know. Sometimes, life just fucking sucks and you get dealt a really shitty hand and then you find yourself on the streets.” Robert opens his mouth to say something, but can’t seem to find the words, the lump in his throat making it difficult. The guy's misfortune suddenly makes him accept his own.

“I’m Connor by the way.” He says, extending his hand out for a shake.

“My name’s Robert.”

“ROBERT! ROBERT!”

“ROB!” Aaron frantically calls to him. “What’s wrong?” Liv had run in to get him when Robert became unresponsive. He had been so caught in memories long put away, he didn’t even register Liv or Aaron trying to get his attention, trying to reach him. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He mumbles out.

Aaron leans in, taking Robert’s hand to help him out. Robert still seems a bit dazed, so Aaron’s concern grows, he takes Robert in and helps him down on the couch. “So, you going to tell me what’s going on?” Aaron asks. “Nothing’s going on.” Robert replies, feeling that ache in in his chest, he hates it with every fiber of his being. The thought alone that he’s doing it again is enough to bring tears to his eyes. He blinks, trying to make them go away at first, but he knows there’s no point. Aaron knows him in and out. He can see it in his eyes, there’s a sudden look of sadness. He knows Robert just lied. He knows he’s trying to hide something.

“Robert, please talk to me.” He begs.

“I... I can’t Aaron.” Robert stammers out.

“Robert…”

“Aaron, please don’t make me lie to you. I can’t handle it.” He says, tears dropping from his eyes.

Aaron exhales in frustration, he tries to recollect himself as he pinches the bridge of his nose. “No Robert. You see this here.” Aaron says sticking his hand out to Robert, making sure he can see the ring. “This means that like it or not you are stuck with me for the rest of our lives.”

“And me!” Liv shouts down from the top of the spiral staircase. She was clearly listening in on the conversation. “You’re stuck with us.” She reiterates. Aaron rolls his eyes, though he feels a rush of warmth in his heart knowing Liv is there for Robert, that she loves him as well. “Liv, please give us some privacy will you.”

“This concerns me too you know. We’re a family and I’m not going to just stand by and let you two be idiots like last time.”

“Liv, please.” He says exasperated. “Fine, but you two better sort it out and please keep me in the loop.” She finally huffs out as she comes down the stairs, heading towards the couch where she stops and hugs Robert from behind. “I’ll be at Gaby’s, let me know when I can come back.” She says before heading to the door and stepping out.

Aaron sits at the edge of the coffee table facing Robert. He takes his hands into his own, gently rubbing circles with his thumb over Robert’s hand as he looks him in the eyes. “So, you going to tell me what’s wrong, who this bloke was?” Robert gently shakes his head. “I’m sorry Aaron. I’m not ready to talk about it just yet. Maybe one day soon, but not now. I promise you though, that I’m fine and I’ll tell you when I’m ready.” He says, meaning every word, but he knows however, that he doesn’t know when or if he’ll ever be ready to talk about it.

Aaron simply gives him a small smile as he leans in and kisses his forehead. “Yeah, okay. I trust you. Just know that I’m here and you can talk to me about whatever it is. I love you and you’re not alone anymore, never forget that.”

Loud grumbles from Robert’s stomach abruptly interrupt the conversation spreading embarrassment across his face. Regardless of the seriousness of the conversation both men can’t help but burst out in laughter. Both appreciative of the respite it brings, a little laugher never hurt anyone and they sure could use it. “Mate, when’s the last time you ate?” Connor asks. “Not sure. Couple of days ago maybe. Down to my last few quid and I’m kind of saving them for gas for when I figure out what my next move is.” Robert replies, defeat written all over his face. “Tell you what, if you can spare a couple, there’s this place nearby. Real shit hole, but real cheap. I reckon we can grab a decent meal.” He says. “Yeah, okay.“ Robert replies in agreement.

After locking up his car they make their way down to Charlie’s, the place Connor spoke of. _Man, he wasn’t kidding, this place really is a shit hole._ Robert thinks to himself as they walk in and take a seat in a booth near the back of the place. As he looks around the dimly lit place he sees what a wreck it is. The air filled with smoke, stains on the walls, broken chairs all over the place, busted lightbulbs, and plenty of dodgy looking blokes around. With his current financial situation, there’s nothing he can really complaint about, it’s either this or starve. “This place is great, now I can finally get hepatitis.” Robert states matter of factly making Connor break out into laughter.

Despite of the atmosphere and the look of the place, the food isn’t half bad or at least that’s what Robert tries to convince himself of. He just hopes that he’s not going to spend the following day suffering from food poisoning. As their server comes along with their check Robert reaches for his wallet to pay for his half but Connor quickly waves him off and pays for them both. “You didn’t have to do that.” He says to Connor. “No worries mate, you look like you needed a win. Trust me, I’ve been where you are. I know how hard it was at first…I mean it still is, but I’ve been doing it a while and your still fresh. Plus, you can take that as payment for letting me crash on your passenger seat tonight.” He says with a smile on his face.

He’s had a rough couple of weeks, but maybe his luck had just taken a turn for the better. It may not be much, but meeting Connor, having someone who’s been through what he’s going through now might be a good thing.

 

 

 

 


	13. Thank you Sarah

 

  
 

He tosses and turns trying to go back to sleep, but his stomach is busy turning, maybe he wasn’t going to have to wait until tomorrow to deal with that food poisoning he was sure he was getting. He tries not to make too much noise, he doesn’t want to wake the man sleeping next to him. Connor appears to be out cold in the passenger seat up front, Robert gathers that it’s been a while since he last slept on something soft, somewhere besides the makeshift tent out in the alley. His car might not be the most comfortable to sleep in, but Conner’s current setup couldn’t possibly compare. It was almost instant that he fell asleep when he settled in for the night. They’d spent a couple of hours at Charlie’s eating as Robert tried to think about anything other than the obvious, his current situation and how he got there.

Connor seemed like an okay bloke, but he just met him and he’s not about to spill his guts out to a total stranger, not to mention that he hasn’t even fully accepted what’s happened. How could he?  _What am I going to do?_ He asks himself as he begins to lose his breath. There’s a sudden tightness to his chest and he feels sweat forming on his forehead as his breathing begins to race, faster, deeper, labored.

 

This is it, the moment he’s been trying to avoid, the moment he’s done everything within his power to push away. He quickly sits up and rushes out the door making his way into the alleyway just in time to throw up. He throws up until there’s nothing left, until the dry heaving becomes too much and he crashes to his knees, tears running down his face, he throws his head back, trying to breath.  _Just breath, just breath, just breath_. It’s all that runs through his head as he finally feels the cool air rush into his lungs, a minor relief that doesn’t last long. He’s been at a breaking point since the moment he first got into his car, made to leave, and he can’t contain it any longer. There’s nothing left in him. He’s too exhausted, too scared, and just done holding himself together. He’s homeless, has no family, no friends, has nowhere to go, and he now finds himself kneeling in his own vomit. He clenches his fist to his chest as he begins sobbing uncontrollably…trying to hold the pain at bay, trying to push it back in.

He’s been hurt, everything in his life has gone wrong, and the only person who loved him, the only person who would be there for him no matter what, was gone. His mom had been taken away from him by his own brother…the adopted brother his own father chose over him, and he would never get her back. The thought of Sarah only sent him further into despair, not that it mattered, at least there was no one around to see his breakdown. Robert’s using the sleeves of his shirt to wipe off the tears when he feels a hand gently settle on his back as Conner crouches beside him.

“Are you okay?” He asks but gets no response.

“Robert…is everything alright?” Still nothing.

The hand on his shoulder gently shakes him. “Robert, are you okay?” Aaron gently asks as he sits up in bed looking at him with concern in his eyes. Robert had been dreaming, though not quite dreaming, it was more like reliving memories he’d put away long ago. He sits up to look at Aaron, trying to put on a brave face, he smiles at Aaron and gives him a nod, feeling the pang of guilt in his chest. He knows Aaron doesn’t believe him, he can see the sadness in his eyes, a sadness that comes from feeling helpless. Aaron reaches over and places his hand on the side of Robert’s face and with his thumb gently wipes away the tears he didn’t even realize were there. “Come here.” Aaron says, pulling Robert’s head to his chest as he lays back down and places a kiss to the top of his head. He waits patiently until he feels Robert fall asleep, before allowing himself to relax. He’s trying his best to give Robert the space he needs, but it’s killing him knowing that something’s wrong, something that he can’t fix, at least not until Robert opens up. He places his lips to the top of Robert’s head and breaths him in. All he can do for now is support him, let him know how much he’s loved, and hope that with time he will let him in.

It’s been a week since the encounter in Hotten, since those memories came crawling back and it seems that they’ve gone just as quickly as they came. Everything is back to normal and he’s thankful for it. He can go back to his life, back to only worrying about his upcoming wedding to the love of his life and never having to worry about that time in his life that he wants to forget. Aaron is his present and his future, no use in thinking of the past.

Sitting in a booth at the pub, Robert pulls out his phone to text Aaron.

_Robert: Where are you?_

_Aaron: Still at the Scrapyard, finishing up now. Be there in a bit._

_Robert: Better hurry, I think Liv is about to eat her arm._

_Aaron: She’s such a drama queen._

Robert chuckles at that last message with a massive grin on his face. Liv looks up at him scrunching her eyebrows. “What’s so funny?” She asks. He looks back at her and shrugs his shoulders, Aaron’s right, but if he tells her what he said she’ll put on a show and storm out. The thought of it alone makes him burst into laughter, he does it so wholeheartedly that Liv can’t help but join in, without even knowing what he’s laughing at. “Seriously, what’s so funny?” She asks. “Trust me, you don’t want to know.” He replies, before taking a drink of the pint he’s been working on for the last 10 minutes. “Rob, sorry to interrupt, but there a guy up front that’s looking for you. Says his name is Connor.” Victoria says, as she walks up to them.

He almost drops the pint he had in hand the moment he heard the name. This is the last place he’d want Connor showing up. His eyes shoot up towards the entrance where he spots him and stands to make his way over to him when he feels a small hand grab him by his wrist. “You gonna be okay?” Liv asks, with concern in her eyes. She was with Robert the last time he saw the bloke and saw how much it affected him and she’s worried for him. He gives her a nod and walks off. As he nears the front, he grabs Conner by his arm and pulls him outside, whatever he has to say is not something he wants anyone else around to hear. Looking for as much privacy as he can get, he leads him around the side of the pub.

“Didn’t you take the hint after that stunt we pulled with Lawrence? I told you I never wanted to see you again.” Robert says, through gritted teeth. He’s trying to be as calm as he can, trying to keep his voice low. Connor’s eyes go straight to the ground, he almost looks hurt. “I know, but…” He says, before Robert cuts him off.

“No buts. I paid you good money for your part and it was more than enough.”

“Not everything is about money, Robert. Some things are a bit more personal. I needed to tell you something.” Connor says, still keeping his eyes to the floor, unable to look Robert in the eyes.

“This…you and me, that part of my life is in the past. It’s not something I want to remember.”

“Fuck it! I’m dying, okay!” Connor yells out, as tears threaten to run from his eyes. “I’m not here to mess with your life, if that’s what you think.”

“Well, it wouldn’t be the first time you tried ruining my life.” Robert yells back.

“I’m sorry, Rob. Okay? I’m sorry. I was a real asshole, I’ll admit that, but I was hurt. You know what it feels like to have your best friend look and treat you like trash, after everything you’ve been through together? You moved on, you got a  _real_  job, and suddenly you couldn’t be seen with me. That fucking hurt. So sue me for feeling like someone needed to knock you down a peg or two. Everything I did, you did as well. You were no better than me. None of it matters, not anymore.” He exhales sharply. “Look, I just wanted to make peace with you, okay.” Connor pauses to catch his breath. “You know, I’d be lying if I said that you weren’t the most important person in my life. You’re my only family Rob, you might not care, but I’ve missed you and I just needed to tell you.”

And just like that, the tension drops from Robert’s body, his shoulders drop and his face softens, as tears form in his eyes. “Fuck! What is it?” Robert asks, as he throws his head back, wiping his palms over his face.

“Brain Tumor.”

“Okay…we can work with that. We can find you the best neurosurgeon…” Robert tries, before he sees Connor shake his head.

“I’ve already been to the best…The best of the best. No one will touch it. It’s grown too much and it’s touching too much, so they’re all too scared to go in. They all pretty much told me to go home and be with my family, to enjoy what time I have left with them.”

“How much time?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. They were all surprised that I’m still alive, they all guessed it could be any given time.”

“Connor, I’m sorry.” Robert lets out.

“Don’t be. I just need you forgive me, you’re the only family I have, the only person I care about. I can’t die with you hating me.”

“You’re still such a div.” Robert says as he leans into Connor hugging him. “Nothing to forgive. You were there for me when no one else was. It’s because of you, I was able to make it through the hardest part of my life. Even after everything, as much as I had wanted to hate you for the shit you did, I never could.”

Connor gently pushes himself away, smiling. Robert’s not sure how he’s getting through this, how he’s managing to cope, but he looks at peace with what’s happening to him. In that moment, a flash of the old Connor comes to his thoughts, he remembers that kid he met long ago, he remembers how resilient he was, how he always rolled with the punches. “Maybe we’ll meet again one day, on the other side. If we do then you’ll have to introduce me to this husband of yours. Must be pretty special if you finally accepted who you really are for him.”

“Aaron, his name is Aaron. I think you’d like him.”

Connor leans in to give Robert a kiss on the cheek before he pulls back and starts to walk away. “Have a good life, Robert Sugden. Make sure you live it for the both of us.” He says, as he looks and waves back at Robert over his shoulder.

All Robert can do is watch as his best mate walks away. The realization that it will probably be for the last time hits him and the tears he’d been fighting back let go and stream down his face.

 

________

 

Aaron picks up the pace as he makes his way to the pub, he’d gotten held up at the scrapyard a lot longer than expected with paper work that needed to get done. He’s been slacking a bit on it, as of late, part of him doesn’t even know why he still bothers with showing up at all. Robert’s been trying to get him to just hire more workers so they can just sit back and relax. Besides, they don’t even need the money now, they’re set for life, so it’s not like they even need to work. He’s near David’s Shop when he hears shouting coming from outside the pub and wonders who’s the idiot that’s gotten drunk and decided to put on a show tonight.  _Has to be a Barton._  He thinks to himself, before his stomach turns the second he sees Robert outside with some bloke, he was too far to hear what was being said, but the moment he is fully within sight he sees the bloke kiss Robert on the cheek. The sight makes him stop dead in his tracks and he feels like someone just punched him in the stomach when he sees the tears running down Robert’s face, as the bloke walks away.

Aaron watches as Robert wipes away the tears and takes a deep breath before he turns and makes his way back into the pub. Every fiber of his being begging him to run to Robert, to comfort him and make sure he’s alright, but all of that is thrown aside as he sees the bloke responsible for Robert’s current state, walking in his direction. He clenches his fists as he walks towards him intentionally stepping in front of him, standing in his way. “What was that about?” Aaron sneers through gritted teeth.

“I’m sorry?”

“What do you want with my husband?” Aaron asks, staring the bloke down, ready to swing if needed, but the tension quickly dissipates when he sees the bloke’s eyes soften and a small smile come to his face. It’s the same eyes, the same smile, he’s taken aback by the familiarity of them. It’s such a bizarre feeling to see them on someone else, seeing them on someone other than Robert. It’s that same sadness, hiding behind a smile.

The bloke lets out a slight chuckle, reeling Aaron back from his thoughts. “You must be Aaron.” He says, as he widens his smile. “I’m Connor.” Aaron flinches, surprised that he knows his name, knows his relation to Robert. “Well, Connor, you didn’t quite answer my question. What do you want with my husband?”

There’s a sudden shift in Connor’s expression, a look of regret flashes in his eyes as they break contact with Aaron. “Look, I’m not here to cause any trouble. Me and Rob, we go way back and I haven’t seen him in a couple of years. I just came to see him, to catch up.” Connor says, looking anywhere, but back at Aaron’s eyes. Just hearing him say  _Rob_  sends a wave of jealousy through his chest. Besides himself, the only other people who call him that are Liv and Victoria. He even seems uncomfortable when Chas calls him that.  _Who does he think he is, calling him that?_ Aaron thinks to himself.

“Really? So, what was that about? The shouting? I saw the state you left him in.”

Connor sighs. “You saw that, did you?” Aaron nods, as Connor asks. He sighs again. “You wanna grab some coffee?” He asks, as he nods towards the café, he doesn’t wait for a response as he continues walking past Aaron, who turns and slowly follows behind Connor. They take their seats as Bob lets them know that he’ll bring their drinks over shortly and share a moment of awkward silence before Connor begins.

“Like I said, we’ve been out of touch for a while and there was something important I needed to talk to him about.” He says nervously shaking his foot. Hoping Aaron will leave it at that.

“Listen, mate. Me and him…we’ve been through a lot. Hell, I wouldn’t even be here, in front of you today, if it wasn’t for him. There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for him, just as I know there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me. What I’m getting at is, if you even think of hurting him, I’ll end you.” Aaron threatens.

Connor chuckles lightly. “I can see why he likes you.” He says, as Bob comes up with their drinks and waits until after he leaves, to continue. “I’ll admit that I was a real asshole to him…more than once, but you have to admit he kind of brings it on himself.”

Aaron can’t help but spit out the coffee he was drinking and bursts out into a bit of laughter. “Guess you really do know him.” He says giggling, as he tries to clean up after himself.

“He’s like the only family I’ve got.”

“Mate, I hate to break it to you, but he’s never mentioned you before.”

“Not surprised. I did say I was a real asshole to him, didn’t I? We had a bit of a falling out because of it.”

“What happened?” Aaron asks, noticing how uncomfortable Connor becomes at the question.

“Like I said, I was a real asshole to him. On more than one occasion.”

Aaron knows he’s not going to get anywhere on that subject, so he changes course. “So how long ago did you meet him?” He asks.

“Man... we were both 19 when we met.”

Hearing that specific number makes the bells go off in his head. He knows the importance of it. That’s when his dad ran him off. It’s the start of a gap in time that Aaron hasn’t been able to find out about. A time that Robert always avoids. That wave of jealousy roils through him again, knowing that this bloke owns that time with Robert. Part of him wants to pry further but the other part wants to respect Robert’s feelings on the matter and he hates himself for the part that wins over. Aaron picks his cup back up, the coffee now cold, something he’s always hated, he looks straight into it, breaking eye contact. “He…he doesn’t really talk about that time. After his dad made him leave. What’s so horrible that he won’t talk about it?”

Connor sighs, putting his drink down. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but it’s not my story to tell. He has his reasons for keeping it to himself, so if you want to know, you’re going to have to push him.” He says, as he stands. “I like you, Aaron. I can see it in your eyes, how much you love him. He deserves that and so much more. He’s had a really rough life, so you be good to him.” He says, as he walks away.

It was late by the time they got back to the Mill after their family meal. The meal itself had been very uneventful, they made small talk mostly, with a joke here and there. Not one of them made any mention of Connor, each one of them sharing the same guilt for not talking about it. They’d made a promise that there would be no more secrets, no more keeping anyone or anything in the dark. Communication had always been their downfall and if they were going to make it as a family, they were going to have to learn from their mistakes. Thinking about it alone sends an ache through Aaron’s chest. Secrets have torn them apart in the past and he’d made a promise to himself, to Robert and to Liv, that it wouldn’t happen again. As they walk through their door he pulls out his phone and quickly starts tapping his fingers away, sending a text to Chas and as he hits the send button, he turns to Liv. “Liv, can you run upstairs and grab whatever you need for the night? You’re staying over at Mom’s tonight.”

“What? Why?” Both Robert and Liv asks simultaneously.

“There’s something me and Rob need to talk about.” He says, keeping his eyes on Robert.

Though part of her wants to refuse, she simply nods, agreeing and does as she’s told. She’s tired of being sidelined, this is her family and she feels that she needs to fight for it every bit as much as Aaron and Robert. After tonight, it won’t happen again, she won’t sit by anymore.

“Aaron?” Robert asks, concerned.

Aaron waits until Liv quietly rushes by. “Mom knows you’re coming, so don’t get any funny ideas. You know she’ll come looking for you.” As soon as she’s out the door, he turns his attention to Robert. “The reason I was so late today was because I ran into Connor. We, erm…we had a little chat.” He says quickly, noticing the sudden drain of color from Robert’s face, as he slowly sits on the couch. He looks like he’s going to be sick.

Keeping his eyes on the ground Robert asks him. “What did he say?”

“Honestly…not much, but he did make me realize that we can’t keep doing this. I know I said I’d wait until you’re ready to talk about this, but Robert – you have to let me in.”

“Aaron…I can’t.”

Finally, something inside Aaron snaps. He’s not quite sure what it was. Maybe the jealousy in knowing that someone else owns this part of Robert’s life, maybe pure frustration. None of it matters though, he promised himself after last time that he was going to fight for them. “NO, ROBERT!” He shouts. “We promised that we would fight for this…for us. We promised no more secrets. I love you and whatever it is, you can tell me.” Aaron pleads, as he walks over to Robert and sits on the coffee table in front of him taking his hand.

Robert keeps his eyes to the ground and takes a deep breath, before he begins. “When I left…when dad made me leave, I had nowhere to go. I just drove as far as I could. I’d been living out of my car for a couple of weeks when it finally gave out on me.” He says, as he lets outs out a shallow huff. “That’s when I met Connor. He was homeless, had been for years, he helped me out. Pretty much taught me how to survive on the streets. He showed me the best places to  _beg_ , the best places to camp out at, the best places where we could wash up…” He hesitates for a moment, there’s a look of shame in his face as tears begin to build in his eyes. “And for when we were desperate enough, the  _cleanest_  dumpsters to eat out of.”

He can’t bring himself to look back up at Aaron and keeps his eyes on the floor as he continues. “Wasn’t long before my car was stolen. What little I owned was lost with it. My last picture of me and my mom…” He says, the lump in his throat threatening to keep him from continuing. “After that, I really was homeless, ended up on the streets living in alleyways, it’s when things got worse. Everyone knew I was the new kid around, so I’d get attacked at night while I slept, they’d take away what little I had left or I’d managed to get my hands on. Got so used to it after a while, I just started kicking out of reflex when it would happen. I think that’s why I kick in my sleep.” He stops momentarily and notices the tears collecting on the floor, feels as they drip from his eyes. He squeezes his eyes trying to fight them off.

Robert’s been sitting in silence now for a couple of minutes. He uses the sleeves of his shirt to wipe away the tears from his eyes before he stands and takes a deep breath. After what life had done to him, after what Jack had done to him, he decided that he was done crying. He was done being a victim and he was going to put himself first from now on. His family and friends had failed him and now so had Connor. Connor’s been gone for a few weeks now, he just never came back one day after his usual run. It wasn’t like Connor to just disappear and Robert had no idea what had happened or what to do. The cops don’t care about homeless people going missing and even if they did, there were no leads that Robert could think of.

He had to face the reality that yet again, he was alone. After his breakdown, he decided that relying on others was pointless. Everyone had failed him. The only person that mattered was himself and that’s the only person he was looking after from now on.  _You’ve let your emotions run your life for too long and look where that’s got you._ After this last cry, this final breakdown, he began building the wall that would come before everything else. The one that would protect him. He closed himself off, no one would ever hurt him again.

On a cold night in December Robert huddles inside his makeshift tent trying (and failing miserably) to keep himself warm. It’s frigid outside and the snow isn’t helping, what little shelter and clothing he has isn’t helping him fight off the constant shiver. It’s nights like these that he finds it the hardest to get any sleep. As he blows warm air into his cupped hands he sees a bloke walking into the alleyway. He’s wearing an expensive looking coat and looks very bundled up.  _Poor bastard is so going to get mugged._  He’s thinking to himself, when he’s surprised to see that the bloke is walking straight towards him. Even through the chattering of his teeth he can hear the footsteps as they get closer until they’re right outside his tent.

“Sugden!” The familiar voice chirps out.

Robert instinctively jumps out and decks him right in the shoulder. “What the fuck, Connor? What happened to you?” He asks, finally able to fully see Connor’s face that was partially hidden by the scarf and hat he was wearing. “Seriously mate? It’s been 2 months.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. Everything happened so fast.” He says with a gentle smile. “Come on, I’ll tell you everything.” He says as he pulls his coat off and hands it to Robert. “Here, you’re probably freezing that sweet ass of yours off.” He says, winking an eye at him. “We can’t have that, it would be a crime against nature.” He finally lets out, laughing as Robert puts the coat on and begins to follow Connor as they start to walk away.

Robert is so dumbfounded that after all this time, after believing him dead because there’s no way Connor would have left without telling him, that Connor was okay and back. It didn’t even fully register when they stopped and grabbed some take out to eat. It’s not until they enter the tiny and mostly empty flat, that a string of questions flies out of his mouth. “Where are we? Whose place is this? Where have you been? What’s going on?”

He’s been silent through most of the conversation stuffing himself with the take out, it’s been days since he’s eaten anything, desperate or not even the dumpsters had become such a miss. The cold weather and snow has really slowed down everyone’s business and the dinners and pubs were no exception. What little hit the dumpsters was gone before he’d even had a chance to check them out. “So, let me get this straight…you’re having sex with people for money? Where do I sign up?” Robert jokes, between bites.

Connor rolls his eyes looking incredulously at him. “You make it sound so fun.” He sighs. “It’s not that simple. It’s not like you get your pick and more often than not, you have to do things you really don’t want to. There’s days when you just want to jump into a shower and scrub yourself raw…” He says, before Robert cuts him off. “I’m not stupid, I know it’s not all fun and games, but I’m serious.” Robert says, fighting back tears that threaten his eyes. “I’m sick of this, I’m tired of living this way. If that’s what I have to do to get off the streets, then so be it.”

“Jesus, Robert.” Aaron says as he removes his hands from Robert’s.

Robert finally looks up at Aaron to see the tears in his eyes. There’s a look in his eyes he’s not used to, something he doesn’t quite recognize. “Rent boy, escort, prostitute, call it whatever you want…it’s what I had to do to get out of the streets. I’d already felt dead inside, worthless, so why not? Years with nothing to my name, living on the streets, begging for food or eating out of fucking dumpsters, anything would be worth not having to do it anymore. Connor wasn’t kidding though, there were days when I hated myself even more than I already did. Days when the water just couldn’t get hot enough, but at the end of the day the money came in. It’s all that mattered.”

“It’s why possessions were so important to you, why money was so important, innit?” Aaron asks.

Robert slowly nods.

Aaron stands, looking down at Robert, slowly shaking his head before he starts slowly pacing between the kitchen and living room, clenching his fists, finding it hard to get his thoughts straight. When he finally comes to a stop, he leans his head back taking a deep breath and turns to Robert, turns to an empty living room. Robert’s gone.

“Robert?” He calls out, as he looks around, before he sees their front door open. “Shit!” He shouts. He knows Robert has ran off. He pulls out his phone and rings him, only to hear Robert’s phone ringing, coming from the couch he was sitting on earlier.

“Dammit Robert.” He whispers to himself, before he grabs his coat and rushes out the door pulling out his phone to call Liv. “Liv. I need your help. Robert’s run off. I don’t know, we were talking and he ran when I wasn’t looking. Doesn’t matter right now, we have to find him. I’m checking Vic’s, I need you to run over to Andy’s and check if maybe he went there. Yeah, I’ll call Paddy. No wait…” Aaron says, before it hits him. “I know where he is. I’ll call you back when I get him home.” There’s one place, one person, that Robert will always turn to when he feels the most lost. Though over time, Aaron has taken this place in Robert’s life, he knows that this is the only place he would run to at a time like this. This is the only place he would find the solace he seeks.

 

________

 

His worst fear has come to life. After everything he had been through, everything he’s struggled with, he let his guard down and let someone in. After all those years of building that wall and closing himself off, so no one would ever hurt him again, he fell in love. He found someone who loved him for who he was, good and bad, someone who made him feel whole and now he was going to lose him again. Now that Aaron knew everything, now that he knew the shame that Robert carried with him, there’s no way he would love him again. “How could he love me now? How could anyone love me? Dad’s always been right, hasn’t he?” Robert asks, as he lays on his knees reaching out with one hand and tracing along his mother’s name on the headstone. “I was a disappointment then and I’m still a disappointment now.”

“No Robert, you’re not a disappointment. You never have been and you never will be.” Aaron says, as he kneels besides him, placing a hand on the headstone and giving Robert a loving smile. “Figured you’d be here. Why’d you run?”

“Aaron, I’ve already lost you more times than I can handle. I can’t lose you again.” He says, as tears stream from his eyes.

“What you on about?” Aaron asks, looking confused. He’s not quite sure why Robert reacted the way he did, but it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that he’s here now and they will fix it.

“This…this part of me, the part that I buried long ago, how could you possibly love me, knowing that?” Robert struggles to say, trying to keep his voice from breaking. He hates feeling so vulnerable.

“How could I not, you idiot?”

“I saw how angry you were when I told you.” Robert says as he looks away, trying to avoid eye contact. He’s not sure if he’s ready to hear why Aaron reacted the way he did.

“Yeah, I was angry. Livid actually, but not at you. How could I possibly be mad at you for doing what you had to do to survive? You know…you know how I feel about my dad. I’ve hated him for so long and I never thought I’d hate someone as much as I hate him. After what you told me I was so angry because as much as I can deal with someone hurting me, someone hurting _you_ , I…I can’t handle that. Everything you’ve been through is down to him, to your dad, and I hate him Robert. I hate him for all of it. I hate him as much as I hate Gordon and I never even met him. I mean…seriously, how mad is that?” He says, taking in a deep breath, before he continues. “I’m sorry if I gave you the impression that I was mad at you, but I wasn’t. I promise. I just wanted to punch something so bad, I had to try and collect myself. You’ve always been strong for me, Robert. You’ve always been there when I needed you, so I was trying to be strong for you.” He says, as he leans in to place his forehead against Robert’s. “You told me once that I was the bravest person you know, well Robert, you’re the bravest person I know. Everything you’ve been through, yet you are the most amazing and caring man I’ve ever known. I don’t know how you do it. I don’t know how you got here and you are the world’s biggest mug for thinking otherwise.” He says as he places his lips to Robert’s.

“Let’s head back home, yeah.”

“Thank you, Aaron. Thank you for understanding…for loving me when I don’t deserve you.”

“You really are such an idiot, you know? You are everything to me and you deserve to be happy every bit as much as I do. We both deserve it.” He says to Robert, as he wraps his arms around him, embracing him in a hug and Robert places his head into the crook of his neck as he quietly sobs. Aaron rubs a hand down Robert’s back, comforting him as he looks back at the headstone.

_Thank you, Sarah. Thank you for loving him, for doing right by him while you had the time, it’s because of you, he grew up to be who he is, why his dad didn’t ruin him. It’s because of you, that I now have him in my life._

_  
_

 


	14. Tell Me Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brought back some smutt.

****

Aaron taps away at his phone’s screen, texting Liv, ending with a happy face emoji.

_Aaron: Found him. Everything’s fine. Can you please let everyone know?_

_Liv: Yeah. Can I come home now?_

_Aaron: Sorry, Liv. We still need to talk some stuff out. We’ll fill you in tomorrow, promise._

_Liv: Give him a hug for me, will ya?_

_Aaron: Will do._

He smiles realizing just how soft both Robert and Liv have made him. Thinking back to the brooding-angry lad he used to be. The lad who’d rather spend the rest of his life alone than do something like get married. If he’d only known then what he knows now, that all he had to do was wait until a certain smug, cocky bastard walked into his life and he would find himself on the road to mending. That everything he’d been through, even his childhood, wouldn’t have been for naught. Everything that happened, did so in order to get him here. To get him to this point, where he would be strong enough to be there for someone he loves. To be their rock. He smiles to himself, proud of who he is, who he’s become, who Robert’s made him. 

They were both damaged, much more so then they’d let on, but in each other they found the strength to heal. They found themselves. He’s known for a long time, known since the moment they met, that they were made for one another. 

They lay on the couch speaking. Aaron with his back resting on the couch’s arm his legs stretched out, Robert cradled between his legs, his head resting on Aaron’s chest as Aaron has his arms around him. “Robert.” He speaks softly into Robert’s head breathing him in, his scent almost intoxicating. 

“Yeah?”

“Tell me everything. I want to know everything. I know it’s hard, but this is something you’ve carried on your own for too long. It’s not food for you, babe. Trust me, I know from experience. Remember?”

Without hesitation, Robert begins. “I did it for a couple of years and I hated myself for it. It never got easier, I never got used to it. I just shut myself in, didn’t let myself feel. If I had, I don’t think I would have made it. There were days when I couldn’t get the water hot enough…I would scrub myself raw. Days when I’d have to get bloody wasted just to hold it together. I don’t know how Connor did it.”

There’s something that’s been lightly eating at him since he chatted with Connor, not that it matters at the end of the day, but he has to ask. “Did you and Connor ever…you know?” Aaron asks and he feels Robert tense. “It’s alright if you did, you know. Not like I expected you to be a virgin when we had our first time.” He jokes trying to lighten the mood. 

He feels Robert nod his head before he responds. “It was just birds at first, but it seems they aren’t as sleazy as blokes. I didn’t want to do it for too long and wasn’t making money fast enough, Connor had told me that if I included blokes that would change. I didn’t want to, I wasn’t ready to deal with what it meant…being with blokes. Not after what happened with dad.” Robert says, as his head and shoulders drop. Clearly upset at mentioning his father. Perhaps it’s something he’ll never get over. “Connor was right though. I wasn’t going to get anywhere as fast as I wanted, so I agreed and he started lining up clients for me, but I was scared and I didn’t want my first time with a bloke to be with some sleazy one…so I asked Connor. He laughed at me at first, thought I was kidding. Once he realized I was serious though, he agreed.”

“Did it happen more than once?” Aaron asks, he can’t help but feel that ping of jealousy in his gut. He knows it shouldn’t matter, but Robert is his, and the thought of anyone else being with him drives him nuts. 

“No, that was it. I just wasn’t ready to accept or even think about that part of me and I only ever thought of him as my best mate. To be honest though, I think he may have had feelings for me. I think it’s why he took it so hard when I stopped, when I decided to move on. Why he felt like I abandoned him.” Feeling like he needs to reassure Aaron, he continues. “I never bottomed though, for anyone. Not until you.” 

He can’t help but chuckle a bit and he does so into Robert’s head before breathing him in and feeling Robert ease into him. “You sure about that?” He teases in a playful tone. He knows Robert meant it.

Robert slaps at Aarons thigh. “Arse.” He jokes back before continuing. “Connor let me stay at his, so everything I was making was all saved. Once I felt like I had saved enough, I got a place of my own and told Connor I was done. He acted like it was fine, like he was happy for me, but turns out he felt like I had abandoned him. So, when I got a real job, he ruined it for me. He thought he was being slick, that I wouldn’t find out it was him, but I did. He’d told my boss that I was an escort on the side, so they fired me. Didn’t want anything to do with me. He did that twice again, when I got other jobs. That’s when I decided to cut all ties with him. I picked up and left. Didn’t tell him where I went. Just gave him a call to let him know that I knew what he’d done and that I never wanted to see him again. After that, I found a job as a line cook. It was so remedial, but I loved it, so I kept at it and kept moving up until they made me head chef. It’s where I learned my mad cooking skills.” He laughs out. “From there I moved to this upscale restaurant, that’s where I sort of met Lawrence. He’d been having some sort of a business meeting and someone at his table had requested to meet me. Wanted to play compliments to the chef and all. Lawrence, the old codger, couldn’t even be bothered to look up. Just kept rambling on about business and positions they needed to fill. Afterwards, one of the servers told me who he was and how wealthy. All I saw was money signs and remembered that he was on about filling positions. The rest, as they say, is history.”

“You ever miss it?” Aaron asks softly.

“What, being an escort. Having sex with strangers for money?” Robert feigns being offended, knowing exactly what Aaron meant.

“No, you idiot. Being a chef? I’ve seen how happy, how at ease you look when you’re cooking.” 

“Honestly, yeah…sometimes. Reminds me of mum. She loved to cook. There’s this lasagna she would make that was to die for. There were times when I would just sit in the kitchen and watch her make it. Sometimes she’d ask me to help.” He says swallowing past the lump in his throat.

“Maybe you can make for me and Liv some time, yeah?” 

“I’ve never been able to bring myself to make it. Vic makes it often, usually when she’s trying to cheer me up, but every time I’ve tried…I just can’t. I get as far as prepping everything up and then I just freeze.”

“How about you walk me through it, and I’ll help you?” 

Robert smiles and nods. “You know, I think you would have liked her. I wish you could have met her, she would have loved you.”

“You think?”

“I know it.”

“I think I would have loved her as well.” Aaron says, as he wraps his arms around Robert and gently squeezes. “Robert, will you do me a favor?” 

“Yeah, anything.”

“I know you come along with me whenever I ask you to, but will you please go to my counselor for yourself. It’s helped me so much and I think it’ll do you a world of good to do it as well. So, will you? For me.”

Robert simply nods. For Aaron, he’d do anything.

 

________

  

He’s not quite sure what woke him up, but as he eases his eyes open, he feels the emptiness next to him. Bingo. The absence of who should be there is what woke him up. It doesn’t feel right, that emptiness. Robert yawns and slowly rubs a palm across his face before slowly sitting up. It’s still dark in the room but that’s all thanks to the blackout curtains he insisted on getting. Complete life savers. Nothing worse than being woken by the glaring sunlight on a day when all they want is to sleep in. He rubs his eyes before reaching for the clock on his nightstand, it’s nearly noon. “Dammit, Aaron. Why didn’t you wake me?” He whispers to himself. 

He calls out to Aaron, but gets no response so he decides to get up. Leaning out of bed, he winces at the slight ache in his legs and smiles to himself remembering the cause of them. Aaron has always been submissive to Robert, craves the feeling of having his husband inside of him, but as of late there’s been a shift in their dynamic. Lately Aaron’s been much more dominant, almost like he’s trying to claim what he knows is his. Not that Robert’s complaining, in fact it’s quite the opposite. He loves it. He relishes Aaron having his way with him. The way he tosses him about, the way thrusts into him, and the things he says to him while doing those things…all things Robert could never tire of.

Thinking about it alone sends shivers through his entire body before he feels the twitch in his boxers. He picks up his phone and starts tapping away at the screen. 

_Robert: Where are you?_

_Aaron: With Liv, why?_

_Robert: I was just thinking about what you did to me last night and now I’m so fucking hard. You better ditch her and hurry back or I’m going to have to take care of this on my own._

_Aaron: 5 minutes tops. Better be ready for me._

Unsure of just how much time he really has, Robert quickly strips out of his boxers and runs for the shower nearly tripping over himself as his feet get tangled in his boxers. He’s barely gotten his hand on the doorknob when he hears the doorbell. _That dirty little grease money, must want it just as bad._ He thinks to himself as he grabs a towel and wraps it around his waist heading down to open the door.

“You must want it as much as I do….” Robert’s in the middle of saying, when he sees the stranger on the other side of the door. It’s a bloke. He’s tall, lean, and handsome with long wavy hair. Doesn’t hold a candle against Aaron, not even close, but then again no one could. Not in his eyes. He quickly brings himself out of his thoughts. “Sorry about that, I was expecting someone.” Robert says.

“Lucky them.” The stranger says, as he runs his eyes down the length of Robert’s body. His eyes lingering a bit too long, making Robert feel the flush of red creeping up his face and cheeks. He doesn’t like feeling so exposed, not unless it’s for Aaron. 

“I’m sorry, are you looking for someone? My husband perhaps?” He says, not wanting the bloke to get any idea. He’s taken and he wants to make sure it’s known.

“I’m sorry. Where are my manners?” The bloke says, lightly shaking his head, trying to collect himself. “My name is Alex. Alex Mason. I presume you are Robert Sugden?” 

“Yeah, that would be me. Do I know you?” 

”No…no we don’t know each other. I’m afraid I’ve come bearing bad news. Perhaps you should take a seat for this?” Alex says. After the surprise intro, Robert was caught off guard too much to notice the red puffiness in his eyes. It’s clear he’s been crying. “Do you want to come in?” Robert asks, nodding inside before Alex shakes his head to decline. “Look, I’m sorry that you have to hear this from a stranger, but Connor passed away last night.” 

All Robert can do is gasp quietly, he has no words. He knew Connor was living on borrowed time, that he could go at any given moment, but that doesn’t make this any easier. “How?” He asks. 

“He had a seizure last night, a bad one, we managed to get him to the hospital and they tried operating. They tried opening the cranium to relive some of the pressure that was being caused by the tumor, but it was way worse than they expected. He bled out before they could really do anything.” Alex explains, before rubbing a palm over his face, poor bloke looks like he hasn’t had any rest in days. “He’d asked me to give this to you.” He says handing over a large manila envelope to Robert.

“What is it?” 

“It’s something he wanted you to have. You know…he’d been sorry about everything. Been sorry for a long time, but you know how stubborn he is. Even after the tumor, took me forever to convince him to come see you. It’s not that he didn’t want to, but he felt like you would never forgive him.”

“He was always such an idiot.” He chuckles out. 

“He would speak of you often, always good things. I can’t say I recall him ever saying anything bad about you. Honestly, I don’t know if I should feel honored or jealous to meet _the_ Robert Sugden.” 

Robert gives Alex a sad smile and opens the envelope. A look of confusion spreads across his face as he pulls out a flash drive, unsure as to what could be on it, he places it back in the envelope, making note to run it on his computer afterwards. He reaches back in and pulls out the only other item inside, a worn out looking photograph. He had pulled it out with the back facing him, needing to flip it over to see what the picture was. The tears he had been fighting back break free and start running down his face the moment he sees the picture. _How’s this possible?_ He thinks to himself. He looks back at Alex to ask, “How did he get this?”

“After he lost track of you, he felt like shit. He knew he’d gone too far. He wanted to find some way to apologize to you and he knew how much the car meant to you, so he went around talking to everyone he knew from back in the day, from back when the car was stolen. He had to pay off a couple of blokes, but he tracked it down. He said he found it completely trashed and stripped out by the docks, not far from your alleyway. That was the only thing he found in it, he found it under one of the seats. As much as he wanted to return the car to you, there was no point, but he figured that picture was just as good. I take it it’s important to you?” 

Robert wipes away the tears from his face and gives him nod. “It’s the only picture I have of me and my mum. Thank you. Thank you so much for bringing this to me. It means more than you could know.” 

“No problem really. Connor meant so much to me so I’m glad I could fulfil his last wish. I’m sorry to be so brash, but I have to get going, I have a shift at Hotten General in an hour, but I’m taking care of all his preparations and I can keep you in the loop if you like?” 

“Yes, please let me know and if there’s anything I can do to help or if you need any help covering anything, I can cover it.” 

“That’s not necessary, but I appreciate the offer. Here’s my card, please send me a message when you can, so I know where to reach you.” Alex says and he gently waves and begins to make his way, crossing paths with Aaron along the driveway. 

As Aaron reaches the door, he catches sight of Robert standing there, bare chested in only a towel. His breath hitches at the beautiful sight. His eyes run down his entire body, but pull right back to Robert’s beautiful green eyes. The same eyes that manage to take his breath away every time he looks into them. “What’s this? Should I be jealous? You, standing out here in a towel with a fit bloke like that walking away?” Aaron teases with a gentle smile. The trust he has in Robert is now complete, there is no doubt in it.

“Connor passed away last night.” He says solemnly, as Aaron instinctively pulls him into a hug. “I’m so sorry babe.” He says as he gently squeezes Robert, trying to console him. Robert squeezes back and tells him that he’s fine, though he’s not really sure. He feels like he should be devastated, like he should have much more of a reaction, but nothing. Connor was like family so how could he possibly be so collected. Aaron can see the look in his eyes, can practically read every thought going through his head. “Robert, you’re in shock. Just let it sink in.” He assures Robert that everything will be fine, that all he needs to do is give himself some time. “You have any idea what’s on the flash drive?” Robert shakes his head, he’s not sure what could be on it nor does he know if he’s ready to see what it could be. At least not on his own. “Can you stay with me when I check it out?” He asks as he takes Aaron’s hand, lacing their fingers together. “Of course.”

His heart is racing and palms are sweating, part of him telling him that he’s not ready to see what could be on the drive, but he has to know. _What could Connor have left on it?_ He opens his computer up and inserts the drive into the port which automatically opens up a folder containing a video file. He looks back at Aaron and takes his hand. “We don’t have to do this right now, if you’re not ready.” Aaron says.

“I don’t know if it’s something I could ever be ready for. He was like a brother to me. He took care of me when even my dad wanted nothing to do with me.” He says, letting tears run free, there’s no need to fight them back. Not with Aaron. “I have to see it.” Robert whispers, as he turns back to his computer and opens the video file. 

It takes a moment for the camera to focus, but when it comes to, Connor sits in what looks like a living room. He’s moving, sitting back in place as if he had just reached out to the computer. The room is brightly lit and well decorated. Very posh. Very much like Connor. Very much like Robert, not that long ago. Not that anyone can blame them, after the lives they lived, after their hardships. They deserved to live the high life. Connor looks straight into the camera and smiles lightly before waving a hand. “Hiya, Rob.” He says, before pausing for a moment, he clears his throat and looks down as a sadness washes over his face, tears building in the corner of his eyes.

“Shit…I promised myself I wouldn’t do this.” He whispers to himself, before looking back up into the camera. “I hate myself for waiting this long. Hate myself for what I did to you, Rob. You didn’t deserve it.” Again, he pauses and takes a deep breath. “I was just so mad at you. I thought that we would be together forever, I thought that maybe I’d have a chance with you…shocker, right? I’m sure you knew or at least suspected, how I felt about you, well, that’s why I reacted the way I did. I didn’t cope well with the thought of losing you, tried my best to keep you near me, but all I did was push you further away. I really did love you, you know, and I’m so glad you found someone that makes you happy. Someone that brought out the real Robert that had been hiding for so long behind those walls you put up all those years ago. He is fucking hot by the way, not sure how you managed that. He’s so out of your league.” 

Robert can’t help but chuckle and look over at Aaron, whose face is blushed, as he smiles. “Aaron really is a top bloke, had coffee with him by the way. No chance I was going to pass on getting to know the one that tamed _the_ Robert Sugden. We only talked for a bit, but I could see the love in his eyes. I mean like I could literally see it, he pretty much had hearts in his eyes when he spoke of you. It couldn’t be more obvious if he had _I love Robert Sugden_ tattooed on his forehead. I hope he knows just how lucky he is.” 

Connor takes a deep breath and continues. “I wish I’d gotten more time, wish I’d been able to do this in person…that we’d been able to get back to being mates. Guess it’s my fault though. Look, I just want you to be happy, so just promise me this one thing. Promise me that you will let yourself be happy. Forget about the past, let it all go and just be happy. You deserve it…oh, actually there’s something else I want to ask of you. Can you please look after Alex? I don’t want him to be alone, he takes himself too seriously and works too much. He needs to make friends and let himself go, maybe introduce him to someone. I need to know that he’ll move on and be happy. I’ll check up on you from time to time from the other side so you better keep up on the promises.” He ends as he winks and waves at the camera, before reaching out and stopping the recording.

Robert swallows the lump in his throat and leans into Aaron who wraps his arms around him and peppers kisses on his head.

 

________ 

 

It’s a bright day outside, not many clouds in the sky, which is welcomed as the bit of heat from the sun helps with the cold breeze that lingers in the air. Aaron and Liv walk side by side on their way home from the Cricket Pavilion making a quick stop at David’s shop to pick up some groceries. They’ve been sneaking off when they get a chance, to work on Aaron’s surprise to Robert for their wedding, in just a few days. “You think he’ll like it?” He asks, genuinely unsure about it. Ever since Aaron proposed to Robert at the party months ago, it seems they’ve been in a competition to outdo one another with surprises. Aaron’s proposal. Robert’s gifts and the wedding in Vegas. No way could Robert possibly top what Aaron has planned. “You’re joking, right? Its right up his alley and knowing you…this is major! There is no way he can outdo this.” Liv responds beaming a smile back at Aaron. 

“You’re right.” He says. It’s true, there is no way that Robert could top this and he knows it, what he’s worried more about is the humiliation he’s going to put himself through. “I can’t believe I actually let you talk me into this.” He says, as he nudges Liv with his shoulder. “Don’t worry though, I think Robert’s gonna be more humiliated once you both see Chas’ surprise.” She laughs out. “No way, no freaking way. She let you in on it? What is it? She won’t tell me a thing.” Aaron practically interrogates her. “You mad? If I tell you anything Chas will kill me. Like, literally kill me. I will say this though, with as soft as you two have gotten, you are going to flip when you see it.” She says, before she spots Jacob and nearly trips.

Aaron chuckles and nudges at her side again. “So, you two official yet?” He asks raising an eyebrow.

“As if I’d tell you.”

“You don’t really have to, your face says it all, Olivia.” He teases.

“Shut up.” 

“You can go if you want, I’ll finish here and take the groceries home. Go on.” He says, as he gently pushes Liv towards Jacob. It certainly didn’t take much to convince her, she gladly ran off without even turning back. There’s a moment where Aaron feels awkward about the whole thing, Liv is growing up and he’s not sure if he’s ready to see it happen, but he knows that Jacob is a good lad so it eases his worries and he goes back to his shopping.

He has a bit of a hard time opening the door with his hands full of groceries, not that it mattered as they all ended on the floor the moment he stepped inside their home. It happened so fast, but Robert has him pinned against the wall next to the door, his lips on Aaron’s as his hands hold on to his face. There’s something desperate in the kiss, in the way he was pinned against the wall and every inch of his body is thrumming in response. Robert breaks the kiss long enough to catch his breath and slip Aaron’s shirt off before he takes his lips again. The hunger, the passion, it’s intense and it’s making Aaron weak in the knees.

He quickly reaches his hands under Robert’s shirt and pulls it over his head before his fingers clumsily fumble at this belt buckle. “Upstairs, now.” Robert says as he walks past him and runs up the spiral staircase, ridding himself of his trousers and boxers the moment they’re inside their bedroom. “Lose those, now.” He says, as he nods at Aaron’s trousers.

“What’s gotten into you?” He asks, not that he’s complaining.

“I don’t need a reason to want my husband to fuck me senseless, do I?” Robert replies bluntly.

Aaron’s eyes go wide and his pulse picks up. Hearing Robert say things like that is not something he will ever tire of. Hearing him speak like that turns him on like nothing else could. He grins and shakes his head to agree with Robert. “No, no you don’t.” He replies, as Robert walks towards him and gently shoves him back onto the bed. With Aaron sprawled over the bed, Robert takes his time to eye every inch of Aaron’s body. Taking in every line, curve, and muscle of his body. He slowly licks his lips before biting down on his lower lip and dropping down to his knees, as he takes Aaron into his mouth. As he pulls back, he wraps a hand around Aaron’s shaft and begins to stroke him as he takes him back into his mouth. The motions are slow at first, but start picking up speed as Robert uses his free hand to run over Aaron’s stomach. The noises escaping Aaron’s mouth only encourage Robert to intensify his motions. “If you keep this up I’m not going to last long enough to fuck you.” He says. “Oh, we don’t want that now do we?” Robert replies, as he pulls back off of Aaron’s dick.

Aaron keeps gazing into Robert’s eyes without breaking contact. “I want you to ride it.” He says, Robert grins before taking Aaron into his mouth one last time. Aaron groans a guttural sound when he feels himself hit the back of Robert’s throat. Robert stands and heads for his nightstand to grab the lube and crawls over Aaron, straddling him. He leans down and takes Aaron’s mouth, its hard and passionate, nothing subtle about it. His tongue parts Aaron’s lips and wrestles his tongue for dominance. As Robert deepens the kiss he squeezes lube into his palm and then reaches behind himself to stroke it over Aaron’s shaft. He then gently rubs some over his hole and gasps the moment he feels Aaron’s finger slip in. One at first, then a second, and a third. He bites his lip while moaning at the pleasure of the intrusion and nearly whimpers when he feels the fingers pull out.

“Go on then, ride it.” Aaron says, in a raspy tone, the one that drives Robert wild. Robert places one hand on Aaron’s chest to brace himself as he uses his free hand to line Aaron’s dick to his hole before he slowly lower’s himself onto him. “Fuuuuuuuuck.” Robert grumbles out, as he glides down Aaron’s shaft in one motion. He throws his head back and moans as he slowly grinds onto Aaron. 

Aaron reaches out and takes Robert’s arse into his hands and squeezes at the cheeks. “I can’t get enough of this beautiful arse.” He says biting his lip. Robert grins and starts to move, slow motions at first as he goes up and down onto Aaron’s dick, picking up pace every few seconds. He keeps his eyes glued to Aaron’s as he continues his motion and as he reaches down to stroke himself, Aaron catches him by the wrist and shakes his head at him. “I don’t think so. I want you to lean back and ride it. I want to see it flopping as you ride me.” He says, with a devilish grin on his face.

Without hesitation Robert leans back placing his arms behind him, hands on either side of Aaron’s thighs, bracing himself. He carefully unfolds his legs trying to keep Aaron inside of him, both his feet now on either side of Aaron’s chest as Aaron holds on to Robert’s ankles. Aaron takes a deep breath, trying to hold himself together. His view of Robert is something to behold. The kind of sight that would make him come without even touching himself. 

Robert looks back into Aaron’s eyes, licking his lips and begins to raise himself before slamming back down onto Aaron. Slow at first, picking up pace every time he raises up, slamming down harder every time. He can’t help himself and his moaning gets louder with every drop, matching Aaron’s. Aaron watches as Robert’s dick bounces up and down with every thrust, watches as it slaps down onto his stomach, where the precum pools. He reaches down, running his fingers in it and then licking every drop of it off. “You taste amazing, Robert.” He says, feeling the heat in his stomach, feeling the orgasm coming. He begins to thrust into Robert every time he slams down. “Fuck. Robert. I’m going to come.” He shouts, as he lets go and unloads inside of him. Robert moans at every thrust and knows his own orgasm is about to explode the moment he feels the hot streams of Aaron’s come inside of him. “Fuck. I’m coming.” He says, as he picks up his pace riding Aaron. His dick bounces while he rides Aaron, the streams of come fly everywhere, some hitting his chest, some hitting Aaron’s chest and chin. He hasn’t even touched himself and he came, harder than ever, more than ever. _Aaron Dingle, ladies and gentlemen._

Aaron smiles at Robert. “You didn’t even touch yourself, you know that?” 

“What can I say, it’s what you do to me.” Robert replies with a wink, before adding. “I hope you’re okay with repeating this for the rest of your life, Mr. Sugden.”

“You better believe it, Mr. Dingle.” Aaron replies, beaming back a smile.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edits done...made a few minor changes to story to make a bit more sense.
> 
> Please leave comments if you have any. Always good to know thoughts on where the story is at/where it's going.


	15. Everything Comes Back To You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updated with edits.
> 
> Please leave comments/kudos. Always good to hear what you guys think. If anything's too cheesy or doesn't make sense let me know.

_FEBRUARY 4 TH_

_This is ridiculous. Why on earth did I agree to this?_ Robert thinks to himself, as he stares blankly into the ceiling of his room. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe he was just caught up in the moment. He’s always been the romantic at heart, out of the two of them, so when Aaron swept him off his feet with the most amazing date night, he was caught off guard. Robert loves nothing more than fine wining and dining and Aaron had gotten them into the new Italian place in Hotten that Robert and Victoria had been raving about. In the end they’d drank a bit too much to even remember how good the food may have been and Robert ended up agreeing with Aaron’s suggestion. He agreed to spend the day before the wedding apart from each other. It will only make it that much better when they finally see each other at the wedding. “All of that anticipation”, He said. Robert can’t help but roll his eyes just thinking about it.

This was pure torture to him. Being apart from Aaron damn near causes him physical pain, or so he claims, but he is known for being a bit overdramatic. Regardless of dramatics, sleep has evaded him. Sleeping without Aaron by his side, without the warmth he brings him, is impossible. He had spent the night tossing and turning, watching television and reading before giving up and just lying there hoping exhaustion would prevail and lull him to sleep. It never did. He leans over to look at the clock on the nightstand, noticing it’s only 5 in the morning. “Might as well get up.” He says to himself getting up, and heading for the bathroom.

After a quick shower, he slips into some comfortable shorts and a t-shirt before throwing on his favorite hoodie. The one he stole from Aaron when he had left the village all those months ago. It happened to have been Aaron’s favorite hoodie so he wasn’t that thrilled when Robert officially commandeered it. He gave it up begrudgingly saying “you do look quite fit in it, anyway.” It put a smile on Robert’s face hearing that come from Aaron, as he felt a right tit in it. It just wasn’t his style really, but it was Aaron’s and that’s all that mattered. The hoodie is the only thing that kept him going when he left the village. All the nights he spent alone at dodgy hotels, he’d lie in bed holding onto it as he tried to sleep. So many times, he thought of just giving up and letting go, thought of ending it all. Life without Aaron was not worth living, yet having the hoodie in grasp only made him think of what he’d leave behind, what he would never see again if he did. It kept him going until he found Andy.

 

________

 

 

_TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK_

He’s had enough, he knew that he couldn’t really be mad. It was his stupid idea after all. _The heart grows fonder…you idiot_. Aaron pulls one of the many pillows over his face and shouts into it. The same ticking he’s heard most of the night has driven him mad. If the cause of it wasn’t something so precious to him, he would have thrown it out the window. It’s Robert’s favorite watch. The one he thinks has been missing for months. Aaron had nicked it back when he left for Ireland, back when he had made the hardest decision of his life. Leaving Robert. It’s something that still shatters his heart into a million pieces, just thinking about it.

He had taken the watch as something to always remember him by. Back at that time he had no idea what he was going to do, had no idea if he would even go back home. All he knew was that even though he and Robert were over, he would never be able to fully let him go. Simply holding onto it made him feel better. He didn’t even realize how he would hold onto it to make himself feel better, not until his counselor asked him about it. She had noticed that any time he began to close up, he would pull it out and fiddle with it in his hands. She made him realize that he saw Robert as his strength. That it was Robert that gave him the strength and the courage, to face anything.

She also made him realize that although there is nothing wrong with needing help from others, he shouldn’t use them as a crutch. He still needs to be strong on his own. He needs to be able to have the same effect for himself. It’s why it took him so long to go back home. Not because of what they thought Robert had done and not because of the baby, but because he had to be able to stand on his own. He had to be able to be his own strength. Only then would he be able to fully understand that he hadn’t been with Robert because he needed him, but because he wanted him. That’s when he knew he was ready to go back, to fight for Robert.

 

________

  

Robert stands in the hall tapping his foot as he finds himself getting impatient. He pulls out his phone and taps away at the screen.

_Robert: What’s taking so long? You said you’d be ready in 5. It’s been 10._

He hits the send button on the screen and stares at the screen waiting for a reply, but gets nothing. After a minute, he is startled when the door beside him opens and Andy steps out; his hair sticking out in all directions and he has bags under his eyes. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days. “Rob, it’s not even 6 in the morning. I’d kill ya if I wasn’t so tired.” Andy let out groggily.

“Aw, look at your little face. Something tells me you wouldn’t make it as a farmer if waking up before 6 in the morning is too hard for you.”

“Shut up.” Andy says, playfully shoving past Robert making his way down the hall to the lift. Andy breaks the silence in the lift as it makes its way down to the first floor where the gym is located. “You couldn’t sleep, could you?” He asks. Robert shakes his head in response.

“Is it really that hard, being apart from him?”

“Yeah… I mean, it’s not that I can’t. I know I can, my counselor has really nailed that into me. It’s just that I don’t want to.” He pauses momentarily and looks up taking a breath. “It’s just that it feels like I’m missing part of myself.”

Andy shuffles on his feet as he chuckles and Robert looks back at him quizzically. “What?” Robert asks.

“Nothing. It’s just…I feel like I barely recognize you anymore.” Andy says grinning, before he continues. “I mean that in the best way possible though. Aaron really has made you a better person, he’s bringing out the best in you, brother.”

Robert nods with a look of pride in his eyes. Aaron really does bring out the best in him. Makes him feel in ways he never thought he’d feel again, not since he was kid, not since he lost his mother all those years ago.

Andy reaches over and pats him on the shoulder as the doors open and he steps out of the lift.

 

________

  

Aaron’s finally had enough of the tossing and turning when the idea hits him. A devilish grin spreading across his face. They may have agreed to spend the day apart, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t text each other. Doesn’t mean they can take advantage of other things they can do, other things they’ve done on nights when either one of them were away on business. He fumbles around looking for his phone and quickly throws the comforter and sheets off him once he finds it. The wicked grin on his face spreads wider once he decides exactly what he’s doing, he quickly slides his fingers into the band of his boxers and pulls them off before reaching for his phone and opening the camera app.

It may have started as a bit of a joke to tease Robert, but he really got into it, taking countless pictures before choosing the exact one he knew would make Robert lose it. He starts tapping away at the screen, sending a message to Robert, followed by the chosen picture.

_Aaron: Missing you ;)_

Now that he’s had his fun he decides to get up. Adam will be by shortly to keep him busy throughout the day. He figured he needed the backup, otherwise he would spend all day thinking about Robert. Not that he wouldn’t anyway, but this way he could try and keep himself busy. He’s just getting out of the shower when he hears the knock on his door, he quickly gets dressed and goes for the door. “Hey bro, you ready?” Adam asks. “Does it look like I’m ready?” Aaron shoots back. “Come in, you can watch some telly while I finish up.

The hotel Chas and Leyla had managed to book for the wedding was luckily in the middle of Hotten, so when the bar inside turned out to be too upscale for them they were able to just step out and walk to the closest pub nearby. A pub was definitely more their style.

“You nervous about tomorrow?” Adam breaks the silence as they wait for the breakfast. “I mean, I know you’ve already gotten married what, twice now? But this is it, mate. This is the big one. The wedding of all weddings, mate.”

Aaron chuckles at first, before answering. “Not for a second. I mean, I hate to sound all soppy, but it just feels right. This is how it was meant to be.”

Adam rolls his eyes at him and laughs.

“What? Don’t even pretend, mate. You know exactly what I mean. You and Vic…I’ve never seen you two happier. You can’t tell me that after everything you two have been through, that it doesn’t just feel right.”

Adam grins back. “You’re right, mate. What’s happened to us? I think we’re just getting too old. You remember back in the day when being single and hanging out is all we wanted? That was mint…but this, this is even better. I wouldn’t change this for the world.”

 

________

  

It’s monotonous. Running in place and going nowhere. He looks around at the empty room full of equipment and no one around but his brother Andy and himself. _Of course, it’s just you, you idiot, anyone in their right mind would be asleep._ He wipes his forearm across his forehead to clear off the sweat that’s building, trying to keep it out of his eyes and regrets not bringing a hand towel with him. It would have made this a lot easier. He’s been at it now for close to an hour, running on the treadmill while Andy continues at the bench-press, long after Robert moved over to running. He’s never been too much for weight training, but lately he’s been feeling the need to keep himself in better shape. Not that Aaron has ever complained, but part of him feels that insecurity that may never leave him. Always afraid that Aaron might find someone better. Someone younger. Someone in better shape. Being a few years older than Aaron makes him feel like he needs to keep himself up. He’s put on some muscle, but in general keeps to running. The few times that Aaron has joined him, he’s asked him to focus on the leg press and squats. “That arse is mint, keep it that way.” Aaron would say with a wink.

As he nears the hour on the treadmill he begins the cooldown just as he hears his phone ping. A message from Aaron. A massive smile spreads across his face, it never occurred to him that they could message. He reaches for his phone and opens the message, instinctively his eyes widen at the sight, he nearly chokes on his own spit, and misses a step. He tumbles and falls off the treadmill.

“Rob, you okay?” Andy immediately rushes to his side to help him up. “What happened?”

Robert laughs at himself trying to get his bearings, he slowly stands, rubbing at his left knee that he landed on and quickly begins to look around for his phone. When he looks past the treadmill he sees Andy reaching down for it. “Andy, don’t!” He shouts.

“Oh god! No. no. no. no. no.” He quickly hands over the phone. “I did not need to see that.” He says laughing hysterically. “Why? Why would he send that?”

Robert’s laugh matches Andy’s as he holds on to his stomach. “Well, it wasn’t meant for you, you idiot. You can’t tell me you’ve never sent nudes to someone.”

Andy can’t stop laughing when he asks. “So that’s why you like him so much.”

Robert chuckles. “I’m bigger.”

“Oh god, I didn’t need to know that.”

Robert’s laughter bellowed across the room. Never in his life would he expected to be here, at this point. So open and proud of who he is, that would joke with his own brother in this way. It’s taken him so long to get here, but it was all worth it and he wouldn’t change any of it for the world.

 

________

 

“You excited about tomorrow?” Chas asks.

Aaron smiles and nods. It’s been a long day and it’s felt like torture, but at the tail end of it he at least gets to enjoy a family dinner with his mom, sister, and pseudo dad. This is it, the last few hours and soon the torture will be over.

“I really am so happy for you, luv. You have no idea how happy it makes me to see my boys like this. To see how far you two have come, and you my little boy, you’ve grown so much. I hardly recognize you. There’s such a light in you. I know you two have been through so much, but I’m so glad you found each other.” She gushes.

“You’re not going to start crying now, are you?” Aaron teases. “You’re going to be a right mess tomorrow, if you can’t even keep it together during a simple meal.”

“Oi, I’m allowed to be a right mess. My baby’s getting married.”

Liv chuckles, almost spitting out her drink. “Yeah, her baby’s getting married.”

“Shut up, Olivia.” Aaron scrunches his face at her, before he takes a gulp of his pint. His phone buzzes and he sees a message from Robert come through.

 

_Robert: Missing you too and don’t be mad, but long story short Andy saw the picture._

 

The moment he reads the last few words he immediately spits out his beer and starts choking, his face bright red as he tries to fight off the look of panic. Paddy shoots off his seat to Aaron’s side along with Chas. “You okay!? What happened?” They ask.

He rubs his hand across his face before he starts laughing. “It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.”

“Are you sure?” Paddy asks. 

“Yeah, I’m sure and you wouldn’t want to know anyway.” He laughs out.

“It’s something embarrassing!” Liv shouts.

“Liv! Keep out of it.”

“It is, look at his face.” She laughs out and then abruptly stops to look at her watch.

“Why do you keep looking at your watch? Is there something more important than your own brother?” Aaron asks.

“I want to make sure I have enough time to go see Rob before it gets too late. He’s my brother too, you know.”

Aaron smiles and sends her off. She’s right, Robert is every bit her brother that he is, in her eyes and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

________

 

Victoria can’t help herself as begins to laugh. She knows she shouldn’t, Robert did get hurt after all, but Andy let it all slip out when she asked why Robert was limping about. “You two, I swear, you act like horny teenagers.” She teases. Having Andy witness the message was mortifying enough, having his little sister teasing him about it, there were no words for how humiliated he felt. The rush read spreads across his face as he fights back the laughter he wants to unleash. He’s embarrassed, yes, but he can’t help and see the humor in it all. “Shut up, Vic.” Robert bites back.

Andy pulls her under his arm offering her protection, leading to her only feeling bolder. “Can I see it?” She asks, with curiosity plastered on her face, as she grins back at Robert “You mad!? No way. Not going to happen.”

“Oh, come on, Rob. Not like I haven’t seen him in the buff before.” She laughs back.

Robert’s jaw drops and his mouth is wide open, as realization hits him.

“I was his first, you know.” Victoria says, before she bursts into laughter.

“Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. I don’t wanna hear this.” Robert says, as he covers his ears and starts walking away. If he wasn’t mortified before, remembering that his little sister has been with his husband is something he wishes he’d never found out about.

Andy and Victoria are hysterical as he paces about trying to forget what was just said. He turns back to them and shouts. “Can we please never speak of that again? Besides, Liv should be here any minute now, so please, for the love of god, can we never speak of this again?” He says, before he laughs out. The last few months have brought him much closer to his family than ever, it almost felt as if they were all trying to make up for the years that he was gone, like they were trying to make up for all those years they wasted being a broken family, before he left. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

Liv had joined them in the hotel lobby shortly after the outburst of laughter brought on by the message and Victoria’s past with Aaron. She’d arrived asking what it was that had Aaron so embarrassed to only restart the outbreak. Lucky for her, it didn’t take much for Victoria to spill the beans on what had happened, sending Liv into the same hysterics, as Robert stood by rubbing his hands across his face. “Aaron’s going to kill me for this.” He laughed out.

They’d all been sitting nursing their drinks after their dinner, enjoying each other’s company, telling old family stories and jokes, when Victoria brought everything back to the big day. “So, you nervous about tomorrow?” She looks to Robert. He grins back at her, remembering this same conversion he had with Aaron back the first time they got _married_. “Not for a second.” He quickly answers, before he continues. “The first time we did it, yeah, I was. I was terrified. It was just such a huge step and everything felt so uncertain, but now, I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. This is it for me **.”** Victoria smiles back at him. “I’m so proud of you, Rob.” She starts light, before turning things a bit more serious. “And you’re sure you’re okay with the wedding being tomorrow, of all days?”

He gives her a sad smile at first. “Yeah, yeah I am. He controlled so much of my life, made me hide who I am. It made me bitter and angry for so long and even after he passed, he was still holding me back, still controlling me. No more. I’m proud of who I am and I won’t spend another day giving what he put me through a second thought. I’m done holding grudges, I’m done holding on to the past, I can’t say that I forgive him for everything, but I’m going to try and remember the good bits. The moments that matter. I think turning tomorrow into a much happier day, a much happier memory, will help.”

Andy smiles at him. “That’s a great way to look at it, Rob. I’m really proud of you. Might not mean much to you, but I really am.”

“Don’t be daft, Andy. It means more than you know.” He says, standing from his seat and going over to Andy for a hug. “You’re my brother and I love ya.” He says, before Victoria jumps off her seat and joins them. “Urgh…you’re all so soft.” Liv teases, before Robert pulls her into the group hug.

 

________

 

_FEBRUARY 5 TH_

The big day has finally arrived. It may have been put together by Chas and Leyla in a rush, but no one would ever be able to tell. Everything looked perfect and they seemed to have nailed Robert’s and Aaron’s style. It couldn’t have been any more perfect had they actually had a hand in it. There was a very sophisticated maroon and gray theme to it. Though the colors were dark, everything looked bold, from the table settings to flower arrangements and center pieces. The grand hall in the hotel that Chas had booked was perfect for the ceremony as well, the chairs and settings matching to everything else.

He had decided to let Chas plan it all out, but he already had the colors in mind so he had her plan around them. He had chosen a bold maroon 3-piece suit for himself with a dark gray tie to match back to the dark gray 3-piece suit he had picked out for Aaron that was finished with a maroon tie to match back to Robert’s suit. Though he had picked out the suit for him, he had yet to see Aaron in it, they’d each gone separately to get them tailored and decided to hold off on seeing each other in them until the wedding.

 

________

 

Robert stood in front of a mirror in his dressing room trying to fix the tie that seemed determined to tuck properly behind the vest. The jacket, vest, and trousers were all a dark maroon color with a white shirt and dark gray tie to complete the look. Aaron had regularly commented on how much he loved that color on him. His maroon jacket being Aaron’s favorite one for him to wear, he wanted to look good for him, so he couldn’t help himself when he found the suit, it had to be the one. The suit fit him like a glove and was fitted perfectly in all the right places, accentuating his legs and arse. “Here, let me help.” Victoria says, as she reaches up and starts redoing his tie, doesn’t take her long to get it perfect. “Thanks, sis.”

Andy steps up from beside Robert and gives a long whistle. “Looking good, Rob. Great choice on the suit. Remind me to ask you for help picking out suits from now on.”

“What on earth could farmer Andy possibly need suits for?” Robert teases back.

“You know there’s nothing wrong with looking smart, or isn’t that what you say?” Andy shoots back joking before they are interrupted by a knock on the door. Liv sticks her head in to let them know that it’s time.

 

________

  

Adam slaps his hand on Aaron’s shoulder as he stands in front of the mirror in his dressing room. “Mate, that suit is mint. You look amazing bro. I swear Robert better hurry up and marry you or I might try and steal you away.” He laughs out.

“Nah, I’m sorry mate, you’re no Robert.” He teases back. “He picked out the suit actually, but it is mint innit?” He says with a smile beaming across his face.

“I’m planning on asking her to marry me. Think she’d be up for it?” Adam blurts out.

“Vic? You mental, of course she’d be up for it. You even seen the way she looks at ya?

“Yeah? That settles it then. Think I might pop the question then, not tonight though, don’t worry, not going to steal your thunder or anything.”

Aaron scoffs at that before laughing. “As if you could.” Adam responds by taking a gentle swing at Aaron’s shoulder.

“Oi, you ruin his suit and you’ll have to answer to me.” Chas teases as she walks in. “It’s time luv.”

 

_________

 

There’s a sudden flutter of butterflies in his stomach the moment he locks eyes with Aaron. His jaw drops and he can’t find it in himself to close it. He’s frozen still for what feels like an eternity as his eyes run up and down the entirety of Aaron’s body. The suit is perfectly fitted to his body. _Remember to send a good tip to the tailor._ Robert thinks to himself, as he takes in the sight before him. His beautiful husband. Dressed to the nines in the most perfect suit, freshly trimmed beard, and styled hair. Styled the way he used to style it before, just the way he loves it. 

 _I’m so fucked._ Aaron thinks to himself, the moment he catches sight of Robert. Robert had picked out both their suits so he hadn’t actually gotten a chance to see Robert’s. _Maroon, he knew exactly what he was doing._ Robert always looks great in suits, always looks great in anything he wears, but this suit in that color was making him weak in the knees. Aaron thinks of how much he’s going to enjoy ripping it off him later that night. He runs his eyes over all of Robert, noticing the styled hair almost similar to his, something he’s never seen on Robert before. Something he’s quite liking.

They walk towards each other both annoyed and glad that they spent the last two nights apart because in the end Aaron was right. It made this moment all the more sweeter. Catching sight of each other was nearly too much. It was taking all of their will power to not simply rush at each other and ravage the other. As they reach each other they stop and lace their fingers together never breaking eye contact.

“Hiya.” Robert is first to speak.

Aaron smiles and responds. “Hiya. You look amazing.”

Robert bites down on his lower lip. “You look amazing as well.”

“Oi, you two. The Vicar is waiting.” Chas brings them back to reality. As far as they were concerned they were the only two people present. No one else, nothing else, existed. When in reality they were surrounded by Chas, Liv, Victoria, and Andy. “Come on, let’s get a move on. There’ll be plenty of time of lovey dovey stuff later.” 

Holding hands, they walk side by side into the grand hall where all their friends and family are seated waiting for the ceremony to begin. Harriet stands at the front waiting on them. Both Robert and Aaron had been glad when Harriet asked to be a part of the ceremony again. For real this time. As they reach the center front and stand face to face with Harriet beside them, she begins. Robert and Aaron hold each other’s gazes as Harriet goes about her part, everything melting away, everything besides each other.

Harriet pulls them from their thoughts as she asks if they have written vows. The both nod and Robert starts.

“Aaron, before you, I hadn’t realized how unhappy I truly was. It’s because of you that I am who I am now. You know me like no one else, sometimes I feel like you know me better than I know myself. It’s because of you that I have a family again, a massive, massive family. You are my past, my present, and my future. You are everything and I only hope that I can make you as happy as you make me.”

“Robert, you make me want to live. I know that sounds dumb, but you do. Before you, everything just felt like a chore, like I was just doing things for others and never truly for myself. You changed that, you make me want to live for myself. You brought happiness back into my life and I hope the same, that I can make you as happy as you make me.”

Their gaze never faltering, they smile at each other as Harriet finishes the ceremony. “You may kiss.” She says.

Robert reaches out and takes Aaron’s face into his palms, the same way he did the first time he kissed him. The same way he did when they first reunited after Gordon showed up. The same way he does every time he wants to make sure it’s all real and he kisses him. Nothing else outside of this kiss, exists. It feels as if they are floating in the air with only a muffled sound of cheers in the background.

 

________

 

 

The ceremony was brief, but that’s the way they wanted it, besides it wasn’t the first time anyway. They now sat at the center table that was set for the couple and their family. Robert and Aaron in the center with Andy, Victoria, and Diane to Robert’s side and Chas, Liv, and Paddy to Aaron’s. Andy stands and clinks a fork to his glass to get everyone’s attention. The music lowers and he goes about making his speech. He tells a story of how he and Robert first met, how Robert made him feel like a part of his family and how it all led to him being adopted into the Sugden family. He wishes him his best. Paddy follows taking his turn at a speech. He jokes about his troubled past with Robert and tells everyone to make sure and record if he gets drunk. Mentions the air guitar and gets plenty of laughs from everyone. Victoria and Adam also jump in and give speeches ending with Liv. “I kinda hated Robert when we first met. He seemed like such a div, you know.” She starts and everyone laughs. “But then again, everyone hates him at first from what I understand.” Even more people laugh. “The thing about Robert though, is that you have to get past the _walls_ first. Once you do, he really is the best. He cares more than he’ll ever let on and he definitely cares about his friends and family. Pretty early I caught on to just how much he loves Aaron, that’s when I knew that they were meant to be. I’m really glad to have you as a brother, Rob and I wish you both the best. Cheers.” 

Once the speeches are over, Chas stands and grabs a hold of the mic that was set aside for her surprise to the boys. “Hiya, everyone. Now, I have a very special surprise for my lovely boys up there. Joking aside, we all know how small the village is. There is no one back home that doesn’t know the story of these two and how it’s clear that they belong together, but just how far back does their story go?” She says as the monitor to the side comes on and she starts a video.

Robert and Aaron look at each other confused, when they see Andy and Katie sitting at a table similar to their current setting. “Oh my god. This is from Andy’s first wedding to Katie.” Robert says. The camera quickly pans away to a much younger Chas who is working the bar, handing out drinks. She looks up and waves at the camera. “Make sure you get all of this. I want to have some good memories from when he’s around.” Both Aaron and Robert look at each other chuckling, before Robert’s jaw drops and Aaron bursts out into laughter. “Is that a mullet?” Aaron asks, as Robert runs his palm across his face trying to hide the embarrassment. In the video Robert is hassling Chas for a drink as he tries to work up the courage to make his speech to the newlyweds. “Don’t tease, I was dumb kid. Must have been 16, 17, maybe.”

After a moment the camera pans again as Chas yells towards it. “He’s over here, you’re supposed to be filming my boy.” The camera settles on a kid sitting at a table face glued to a Gameboy. “Aaron, say hi to the camera.” Aaron barely looks up before going back to his game. This time its Robert’s turn to laugh. “Just look at you, so tiny.” The video goes on for a bit as Chas works the bar and asks whoever is behind the camera to go film Aaron. The camera makes its way around the wedding and there’s glimpses of some of the folks from the village. Jimmy, Nikola, and Bob. When the camera finally finds Aaron again he’s in a corner with two other kids messing with him. The older kids slapping him upside his head as they try and take his Gameboy away from him. As the camera starts walking in his direction to intervene someone quickly dashes in. “Oi, back off you little scrotes, before I make you.” Robert shouts at the kids, before they take off running.

“You okay?” He asks Aaron, who seems too shy to answer. “What are you playing?” Robert asks, pointing at the game. Aaron leans his screen over so Robert can see. “Oh, that’s a cool one.” He says, before Aaron offers up the game. “You wanna play?” Robert smiles at him and nods. “Sure. Sounds much better than this party.” Aaron leans into him to watch him play. The camera watches them for a few minutes before Andy calls out to Robert. Robert gets up, handing the Gameboy back to Aaron and ruffles his head. “See you round buddy.” He says, ending the video. 

Everyone coos at them, and Robert looks back at Aaron amazed at what they just saw. “I remember that. I can’t believe that was you. All this time.” Robert says, placing his hand to Aaron’s cheek. Aaron doesn’t reply he simply leans forward and places his lips to Robert’s. The kiss is gently and loving however it doesn’t last long as Aaron pulls back with a sheepish smile on his face. “One more surprise.” He says before standing and nodding at Liv.

Liv walks over to the center of the room, between the newlyweds’ table and everyone else’s. She’s holding an acoustic guitar in one hand and pulling a chair with the other. Aaron walks over and sits on the chair as he takes the guitar from Liv. He smiles at her and she walks back to her seat. Chas walks over and places the mic in front of him. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.” He says, before he starts running his fingers across the strings.

Robert’s in shock. Aaron, in front of a crowd. Playing a guitar. He turns to Liv. “What’s he doing? When did he learn to play the guitar?” He’s asking, when he recognizes the song. He’s playing This Town by Niall Horran. Never in his lifetime would he picture Aaron playing a guitar, much less in public. A new sense of amazement hits him the moment Aaron begins to sing. Aaron Dingle singing. That low gravely voice of his, sending shivers through Robert’s body even more than usual. Everything but Aaron melts away. _He sounds amazing. I didn’t know he could sing._ As he listens, he loses track of time, not even sure how long Aaron’s been signing. He doesn’t even realize he has tears in his eyes.

 

“If the whole world was watching I'd still dance with you  
Drive highways and byways to be there with you  
Over and over the only truth  
Everything comes back to you  
You still make me nervous when you walk in the room  
Them butterflies they come alive when I'm next to you  
Over and over the only truth  
Everything comes back to you  
Everything comes back to you”

 

As Aaron finishes the song Robert is off his seat and rushes to him, taking his face in his hands and kissing him. 

_Everything comes back to you._


	16. You Win

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, but this was just going to be the wedding night. A bit more fluff and a lot smut.
> 
> Enjoy and please leave comments, always good to know what you guys think.

“You win.” Robert lets out, in that loving, gentle voice he uses only for Aaron. He’s gazing into his crystal clear blue eyes as if they were the most beautiful things he’d ever laid eyes on. “You win.” He repeats, as Aaron lifts a brow in confusion. They’d been taking part in a silent war for months now, trying to outdo one another with big romantic gestures. It’s so unlike either one of them, but they can’t help it. They bring it out of each other. 

The war began with Aaron’s surprise proposal following Robert’s return to the village. It continued when Robert stepped it up surprising Aaron with a birthday holiday to Vegas where he made all of Aaron’s Vegas dreams come true. 

Robert tugs at Aaron’s hips pulling him in closer, he presses their foreheads together. “You singing to me. There’s no fucking way I can top that. You win.” Aaron pulls back with a sly smile on his face. “I’ll tell you what you can top.” He responds, winking an eye, leaving Robert speechless for a second. “Cheeky git.” Robert responds. “Really though. That was amazing. I hope you know you’re going to have to sing to me from time to time.” He says, as he pecks kisses along Aaron’s jaw and neck making him quiver in place. 

“You mad? I sounded awful. I only did it cuz I heard the song a while back and I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Those lyrics. I meant them.” Aaron says with a sheepish smile. 

Robert smiles and places his lips to Aaron’s head, kissing it as he breaths him in. As he pulls back, he quietly sings back the lyrics he knows Aaron is referring to.

 

“If the whole world was watching I'd still dance with you  
Drive highways and byways to be there with you  
Over and over the only truth  
Everything comes back to you  
You still make me nervous when you walk in the room  
Them butterflies they come alive when I'm next to you  
Over and over the only truth  
Everything comes back to you  
Everything comes back to you”

 

He finishes as the music that had been playing in the background comes to an end. Ironically, they had been dancing the entire time. With the couple’s dance over, all their friends and family join in on the dance floor. Robert smiles at Aaron. “I know exactly how you feel.”

Feeling like he wants to steal a moment to themselves, Aaron laces his fingers through Robert’s. “Come on, let’s go for a walk, yeah?” He says, as he leads him away from the dance floor. They exit out the back, into the garden. It’s late at night with the stars twinkling in the sky, there’s a bite to the air and Robert places an arm around Aaron. Aaron leans his head into Robert’s shoulder and releases the breath he didn’t’ realize he was even holding in.

They silently stare into the sky for a moment before Aaron breaks the silence with a chuckle. “What?” Robert asks. “I can’t believe you had a mullet.” Aaron giggles, out earning a pinch to his side. “Arse.” Robert quips back. “It’s okay though…You made quite the impression on me. Had the biggest crush on you, even though I never saw you again.” Aaron confesses. “I remember following you around for the rest of the night. Kept hoping I’d get a chance to play with you again.” He says, gazing into Robert’s eyes. “Yeah?” Robert asks smiling. 

“I just…I can’t believe that was you. All this time.” Aaron lets out. “You’ve always been there, always watching out for me. I love you, Robert.” Aaron leans over and takes Robert’s lips. It’s soft at first but quickly becomes much more. He pauses for a moment to look around. _Coast is clear._ He quickly takes the labels of Robert’s jacket in his fists and shoves him back into an isolated nook. Robert smirks as his back hits the wall. “What’s this now?” He asks raising a brow. 

“The marron suit…you knew exactly what you were doing.” Aaron tells him, his eyes glancing between Robert’s eyes and the bulge in his pants. The bulge that is almost unavoidable in those perfectly fitted maroon trousers. Both his arse and package look delectable and Aaron can’t help himself. The corner of his lips curl devilishly before he quickly drops to his knees. 

His fingers are almost a blur as they work Robert’s belt. It doesn’t take long for Robert’s trousers and boxers to end up around his thighs as Aaron envelops him into his mouth. The heat from Aaron’s mouth makes Robert gasp and he quickly bites down on his lip. Anyone could walk out at any moment and he doesn’t want to call any attention to them. Not that it mattered. This was their night and no one is going to ruin it. If any came upon them, well, they were going to be in for one hell of a show. 

“Fuck.” Robert groans out as he feels himself hitting the back of Aaron’s throat. He’s amazed at how good Aaron has gotten at taking his entire length. At deep throating. He starts to gently run his fingers through Aaron’s hair, messing it up and slightly whimpers when Aaron pulls back. He’s not done with him though, he continues stroking him as he looks straight up into his Robert’s eyes. He smirks before he takes two of his own fingers into his mouth, sucking on them, lapping at them, getting them wet. As he pulls them out his mouth is right back on Robert. Moaning as he works back and forth on his dick. He holds on to the base of Robert’s shaft with one hand as he sucks him off and reaches between his legs with the other. Robert gasps the moment he feels the moist fingers lightly rubbing at the sensitive skin of his hole. He bites his lip as he feels his body surge at the thought of the incoming intrusion and relaxes. His body melting into Aaron’s touch as he feels the fingers slide in. 

“Fuck, Aaron. I’m not going to last if you keep that up.” Robert whispers out between moans. “That’s the point, you idiot. I want it. Feed it to me.” Aaron replies, before going back to Robert’s dick. Hearing him say that is enough to drive Robert over the edge. He feels his body tense, the warmth in his stomach, and the lightness in his head, as his orgasm hits him. “I’m going to come.” He warns, before releasing a drawn out “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.” 

Aaron doesn’t stop, he continues the motions as he prods at Robert’s prostate, making him squirm. He feels the heat in his mouth as Robert’s cum streams into it and he swallows every last drop. He pulls back off Robert’s dick, squeezing at it, making sure that nothing goes to waste. As a bead of cum collects at the slit he licks it off before standing, lifting Robert’s trousers and boxers along with him. 

Robert pulls Aaron into a kiss, tongues dancing around, exploring each other’s mouths. He can taste a faint trace of champagne in Aaron’s mouth, but most of all he can taste himself, causing a twitch in his trousers. _Oh god. Why is that such a turn on?_ He thinks to himself. Aaron brings him back from his thoughts. “Come on, let’s head back.” He says, as he tugs at Robert’s hand, leading him back to the entrance. 

“That was unexpected.” Robert lets out, as they walk back into the grand hall. Aaron glances back at him. “Couldn’t help myself, could I? That suit…You knew it was going to drive me crazy, so don’t even pretend.” He says, right before they’re interrupted by a tipsy Charity. 

“Well, well, if it isn’t the lovebirds.” She quickly chirps out, before her eyes stop on Robert’s face. “Why are you so flushed, Sugsy? Had one too many?” She jokes, looking over to Aaron and stopping at him. She looks up at his hair and notices that it’s tussled, then she runs her eyes over him and notices the dirt all over the knees of his trousers and lets out a laugh. “You dirty little Dingle you. Couldn’t wait until after the party, could you. You might want to fix your hair and wipe off your knees if you don’t want everyone else to know what you two have been up to.” She says, as she walks off laughing, leaving Aaron mortified. 

Robert breaks out into laughter as he runs his fingers through Aaron’s hair, gently placing it back into its proper place, while Aaron slaps at his knees clearing them off. Robert reaches out while curling a finger under Aaron’s chin, he tilts his head up so their eyes meet. Aaron’s beautiful, crystal blue to Robert’s gentle blueish green. Aaron feels himself go weak in the knees just as he does every time Robert looks at him. As if he can look straight into his soul. “Nothing to be embarrassed about, don’t forget she actually walked in on us.” Aaron chuckles, as he rolls his eyes, remembering that time so long ago when Charity had walked in on them having sex in the shower. “Urgh. Don’t remind me.” He groans out. 

As they walk back into the main area of the grand hall they’re stopped by everyone as they wish them their best. Debbie strides up to them, beaming a smile. She hugs Aaron first, letting him know how happy she is for him, then turns to Robert and gives him a hug, along with a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you so much, Robert. It means the world to me.” Robert shakes his head at her. “No need for thanks Debs. I’m just happy that Jack and Sarah will have a place they can call home.” He says, as she hugs him again, before she makes her way. Aaron looks back quizzically at Robert. “What’s that about?”

Robert rubs his palm across his face. “I’m so sorry. I meant to tell you. It just happened so fast, and then the wedding. I lost track.” He lets out with a look of guilt on his face. “I swear I wasn’t trying to keep it from you.”

“Tell me what? What’s going on?”

“Eric was auctioning off Jacob’s Fold. Debbie’s been wanting to get a proper home, but she didn’t have the money. I overheard her talking to Charity about it…I gave her the money for it, well, more like tricked her into taking it. She wouldn’t accept it as a gift so I told her to consider it a loan. Whatever she tries to pay back though, is going straight into a trust fund for Jack and Sarah. I promise I wasn’t keeping it from you. It’s not just my money you know. It’s ours. You, me, Liv…” Robert tries to explain as Aaron cuts him off. 

“Robert, that’s amazing! You’re amazing…but you’re also an idiot. You were just looking out for our family, you don’t even have to apologize for that. I’m proud of ya.” He leans in, pressing his lips to Robert’s. 

The party goes well into the night – free food, free drinks, what more could anyone ask for. The Dingles clan of course get all riled up and huddle in a corner to do who knows what. Robert and Aaron try and ignore them as they stand in the center of the hall. Robert having a conversation with Alex. It took a bit of pushing, but Robert managed to get him out, he’d made a promise to Connor and he intended on keeping it, besides, Robert was in desperate need of mates so he had decided to make the effort in getting on with Alex. It didn’t hurt that they had similar interests, they’d already had several long conversations about comics and manga. He’d even confided in Aaron that he was going to set Alex up with Finn when the time was right. They were all in the middle of talking about Game of Thrones when the chanting began.

“DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE.” The Dingles all chanted.

“No. no. no. no. no. no. no. Not going to happen. I’ve already done it.” Robert protests, as Chas and Debbie walk up to him with the wellie, as the rest of the Dingles surround him, Aaron included.”

“Well, we all just decided that didn’t count.” Debbie starts.

“What do you mean it didn’t count?”

“Well, it wasn’t legal.” Chas counters, with a smirk on her face.

“What? That’s not how…this is ridiculous.” 

“As of today, you sir.” Chas starts pointing directly at Robert. “Robert Sugden Dingle, are now and forever, officially part of the family.” She ends as Sam pulls up a chair to Robert. “Better drink up then Mr. Dingle.” Aaron shouts out from the sideline. Robert playfully glares at him. “You’re going to pay for that, Mr. Sugden.” He returns. Aaron walks up behind Robert, placing his hands on his shoulders and guides him down onto the chair. Robert sighs, rolling his eyes, has already accepted that he’s going through with it, as he’s seated. Chas hands the wellie over to Aaron, who then passes it to Robert, as they all begin to chant again. “DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE. DRINK THE WELLIE.” 

Robert places a hand at the bottom of the wellie as he holds the length with his other, he tips it back and starts gulping as everyone breaks out into cheers. Chas can’t help but smile with pride as she looks from Robert to Aaron. The look of utter bliss and happiness practically radiating from them. She sees the glistening in Aaron’s eyes, she can see the tears of joy that linger in them. She feels a swell of pride in her chest. Pride in the man Aaron has become. “I’m so proud of you, luv.” She says, as she wraps her arms around him, squeezing.

 

________

 

 

Whispers and quiet laughter is all that can be heard down the hall. Robert leans gently into Aaron as they walk back to their room. Robert has his arm around Aaron’s shoulder and Aaron has his around Robert’s waist. They whisper about how trollied Chas had gotten before Jason had to carry her back to their room and laugh over the spectacle of Sam and Lydia dancing. As they reach their door, they stop and gaze into each other’s eyes. “I love you so much, I just don’t know what to do with it sometimes.” Aaron breaks the silence. “Me too.” Robert replies, as he presses his forehead to Aaron’s. “I wish there was a way I could put into words how happy you make me, but you know.” He says. “I know.” Aaron returns. 

As they enter their room, Aaron has barely hit the light switch when he finds himself pinned against the wall, Robert’s lips placing kisses on his neck. Every kiss slower than the previous, as he makes his way up to Aaron’s lips. When their lips lock, the kiss is tender at first, Robert’s tongue parting Aaron’s lips as it explores his mouth. The passion is intense enough to sober them up as the kissing gets harder, Aaron’s beard scraping against Robert’s smooth skin, a sensation Robert cannot get enough of. He loosens Aaron’s tie before he pulls it off and clumsily starts unbuttoning his shirt as Aaron slides his jacket off. Every effort to rid Aaron of his clothes feeling tedious and slow, Robert pulls Aaron’s shirt open sending buttons flying in all directions. Aaron shoots him a slight frown. “But I liked that shirt. A lot.” Robert grins back at him. “I’ll buy you a new one.” He says as he slides it off him, kissing down his chest and stomach as he drops to his knees. Unbuckling Aaron’s belt, he practically whispers with a glee. “My turn.” 

Their eyes are locked onto each other’s as Robert slides Aaron’s trousers and boxers down and Aaron throws his head back with a gasp when he feels the warmth of Robert’s mouth on him. He feels every hair on his body prickle as Robert’s hands pull him in towards him, he feels himself hit the back of Robert’s throat as Robert pushes him back before pulling him in again. It doesn’t take long for him to figure out what Robert was getting at and he begins to thrust into his mouth. As he begins to feel lightheaded and his breathing picks up pace, he slows down on his thrusts, he’s close and isn’t ready for the release. He wants more. He needs more and he knows Robert will give it to him. 

“Robert.” He whispers out. “If you don’t fuck me right now, I’m going to lose it.” He lets out, practically a demand. Robert pulls back off Aaron’s dick and smirks at him before taking one last lick at it, it’s slow and teasing as he starts at the base and runs his tongue along the shaft up to the slit at the head. As Robert stands, he begins to slide out of his jacket before Aaron stops him. “No. Keep it on.” He says with a devilish grin. “You, dirty little grease monkey.” Robert teases, as Aaron reaches down, rubbing a hand across the length of Robert’s dick, straining against the fabric of his trousers. The trousers were so well fitted that they barely left anything to the imagination and now they strained as Robert’s hard-on was begging to be released. Aaron slips off his shoes and steps out of his trousers and boxers pulling his socks off along the way. He places a hand to Robert’s and begins pushing him towards the bed, but Robert’s not having it. Robert spins him around and pushes him towards the end of the living room area in the room, pushes him to the floor-to-ceiling windows that line up the end. The windows that look down into town. 

Robert’s gazing into Aaron’s eyes as he pins him against the window and takes a hold of Aaron’s wrists with one of his hands. He raises Aaron’s hands above his head with one hand as he loosens his own tie with the free one. Aaron smirks. He knows exactly what Robert is doing and holds his hands still as Robert pulls his tie off and gently knots it around his wrists. He had never been this adventurous before Robert, but Robert brings it out of him. A wilder, more adventurous side he didn’t even realize was always there. Robert leans in and takes his mouth in a desperate kiss that nearly takes his breath away. It’s laced with passion and hunger. Aaron’s not sure he can hold out any longer, he reaches down with his hands and quickly works Robert’s belt off and slides his trousers and boxers down enough to free his dick. 

He bites down on his lower lip as he locks eyes with Robert and raises his bound hands over Robert’s head and placed them around his neck. As Robert breaks the kiss, he places his hands on Aaron waist and lifts him up as Aaron wraps his legs around his waist for support. They’re done messing around, they are both ready for release. Neither of them knowing how long they will last. Robert spits into his palm and reaches down to stroke the saliva over his dick. “Please, Robert.” Aaron whimpers out. “Please what?” Robert returns. He knows what Aaron’s asking for, but he wants to hear him say it. He wants to hear him beg for it. “Please, Robert. Just fuck me, please.” Robert lines himself up as he teases at Aaron’s hole. “I’m begging you, Robert.” Aaron lets out breathlessly as he nips at Robert’s ear before throwing his head back in ecstasy as Robert slides in. They both gasp at the warmth they feel from each other as Robert slides in all the way, his hands running along the sides of Aaron as he’s pressed against the windows. If anyone in the building across looks over, they are going to get a hell of a show. Robert begins to thrust into Aaron in a steady rhythm, their breathing matching as they moan into each other’s mouths while they kiss. “Oh god, Robert. Right there.” Aaron moans out. “Harder.” He adds, as Robert picks up pace and strength in every thrust. Aaron using his legs to slightly bounce on every thrust. “Harder!” He begs as he slams down into to the thrusts. “I fucking love you in that suit.” He whimpers out as he begins to spasm, he hasn’t even touched himself and he’s about to come. He arches back as much as he can, hoping that every velvety stream of cum will shoot onto his chest and stomach, hoping he won’t ruin Robert’s suit. “Fuck, I’m going to come.” Robert shouts, as he pounds faster into Aaron. His body tenses and he feels his own release hit him. Robert feels the small jerks his body makes at the same time as the explosion of pleasure that writhes through his body. “I’m coming, Aaron!” He moans out, feeling every stream that shoots out within Aaron.

Spent, they press their foreheads together gazing into each other’s eyes. 

“I love so much, Mr. Dingle.”

“I love you more, Mr. Sugden.”

 

 

 

 


	17. You Can Let Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a terrible accident leaves Robert fighting for his life, Aaron struggles to keep it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, but got a bit hung up on this one. You might be happy that I took this long after reading it though.  
> I was worried about the structure and play with time the entire time writing it, but I think I ended up liking how it turned out. Hope you guys enjoy.

_MARCH 16 TH _

As he lazily opens his eyes, he sees the beam of light coming in through the window in their bedroom, through the slight gap in the curtains. He notices the hazy glow it gives the room and as he rolls over, the glow it gives his husband. His golden hair and fair skin take to the light as if it was meant for him. Aaron feels that flutter of butterflies takes over him, almost feels lightheaded. His face is all smiles as he reaches over and begins running his fingers across Robert’s bare chest, tracing along the freckles that are peppered over his skin. The freckles he has memorized in his head, the same ones that he always pictures in his mind when he thinks of Robert’s bare skin. As his fingers come to a stop he realizes where they landed, right over his scar. The scar left behind by the gunshot that will forever be there to remind him of the time he’d almost lost him. They weren’t in a good place then, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t love him even at that time. He leans in and places a kiss on it feeling that spark that he feels every time his lips make contact with Robert and just like that…it’s gone.

Aaron whines and grumbles as he feels himself waking up. He wishes he could just fall back asleep and continue dreaming, but he knows it’s not going to happen. Simply falling asleep the night before was almost impossible with Robert away on business, especially with the way they left things before Robert left. “Robert, all you’ve been doing lately is working. You keep trying to get me to stop working, yet all you do is take more on yourself.” Robert had rolled his eyes at that. “What’s so awful about me trying to provide for my family?” He shot back, aggravated. “We don’t even need the money and you know that’s not what I mean, so screw you!” He’d shouted in return, regretting his words the moment they left his mouth.

He knows what it means to Robert to provide for his family, for his loved ones. He knows where it stems from. The abuse, the abandonment, the homelessness, and eventually the selling of his own body just to survive. To provide for himself. Just as Aaron had hoped, getting counseling has helped Robert the same way it did him. They’d realized that his need for money and power came from the need to protect himself, to provide for himself. It was how he proved his self-worth. After having spent so many years with nothing to his name, he swore to build himself up and get everything he ever wanted all on his own. Aaron had quickly caught on when they began their affair and their relationship afterward, that Robert would always throw money around at all his problems. Though at the time he had always figured it was just his way of showing people off, he knows better now. He’s come a long way since then yet sometimes old habits die hard.

Robert had left mad, leaving Aaron with regret. He had stood there by the door for a while cursing himself. Hurting Robert was the last thing he’d want to do. Taking a deep breath, he told himself everything would be alright. This is what they do, after all, they wind each other up and makeup. _I’ll make it up to him when he gets back._ He thought to himself. He reaches over to his nightstand looking for his phone to send Robert a quick message apologizing, but felt nothing. It dawned on him that he hasn’t used it since he left the pub. “Dammit, must have left it at the pub.”

His eyes flutter open as he brings himself back from his thoughts and notices it’s actually still dark, very much the opposite of the heavenly dream he was having. He rubs at his eyes considering just getting up and making himself some tea when he hears the doorbell ding in rapid succession. _What the hell?_ He thinks to himself reaching for his alarm clock. “It’s only half 5, what the hell could anyone want at this time?” He asks himself, feeling uneasy about the knot in his stomach that’s suddenly come out of nowhere. He pulls on a t-shirt and grabs a pair of running shorts, quickly making his way downstairs to grab the door. As he hits the bottom of the spiral staircase the dings of the doorbell have been replaced by loud bangs on the door. _No way can this be good._

The scowl on his face is replaced with confusion when he opens the door to Finn. Finn himself looks like he’s just gotten out of bed, hair pointing in all directions, still in his pajamas, and he has his phone to his ear.

“Oh, thank god! He’s here, he’s okay!” Finn practically shouts out into the phone.

“Finn, what’s going on?” Aaron asks confused.

“Here, take this,” Finn says, handing his phone over to Aaron.

“Hello?” Aaron asks into the phone. It’s a bit difficult to make out what’s going on, there’s so much background noise, but he can tell it’s Alex on the other side of the call. “Aaron? Are you there?” He asks. “Yeah, what’s going on, Alex?” He returns. “Aaron, listen…you need to get here, to the hospital, now.” Alex’s almost sobbing into the phone. “It’s Robert.” The moment he hears the name, he feels as if he’s lost his breath…like he’s suffocating. “What do you mean, it’s Robert? What’s going on?” He’s panicked, he’s not even aware that Finn has already grabbed his coat for him and is leading him to his car. “I’m not entirely sure what happened. I was done with my shift and I was heading out when I saw them bring him in. It’s bad Aaron, it’s really bad. You need to get here now.”

 

________

 

_MARCH 11 th  _

“Are you sure about this?” Alex asks Robert, as he leads him down the hall to his apartment. There’s nothing that Robert hates more than lying to Aaron, hates it so much he’s even voiced it to Aaron in the past. He had lied hundreds of times to Chrissie and never felt it, but even the smallest of lies to Aaron rips his heart out. This small little lie though, he knows he can get away with. Besides Aaron had pretty much been begging for this for weeks now. It wasn’t long after they got back from their 2-week long honeymoon, that both Aaron and Liv started dropping hints about getting a puppy, much to Robert’s vexation. It’s not that he hated the idea, he was just certain that somehow, he would be stuck being responsible for it. Liv is still a kid and not very responsible, while Aaron wasn’t that much better really. Robert laughs to himself, just thinking about it.

“Yeah, I’m sure. Aaron and Liv are going to flip when they see him.” Robert replied as he followed Alex. “So…Finn?” He asks before Alex lets out a small chuckle. “What about Finn?” He replies. “How’s that going?” Robert asks giving him a slight shove to the shoulder. He had made a promise to Connor about watching out for Alex and meant it, but what started out as keeping his word blossomed into the best friendship he’d ever had, outside of Aaron. He’d never really been one for having mates, but Alex had quickly become his best mate, along with Finn, oddly enough. The three amigos as Victoria and Aaron would tease. One mention of Manga or Comics and they could ramble on for hours.

Robert had noticed a bit of something between Alex and Finn back at the wedding and knew they would hit it off when the time was right. He’d set them up only a week ago and was curious about how it was going. “Wow, never pictured you for the gossiping type.” Alex fired back, laughing. “What, I can’t be excited for my best mate?” Robert adds, Alex rolls his eyes as he sighs. “It’s going…I like him, but I’m trying to take it slow here. I’m not sure if I’m fully ready to be dating, but I really do like him.” Alex gives in to Robert’s questioning as they make it to his apartment. Robert smiles and nods, he’s pried enough and doesn’t want to push, so he decides to change subject to what’s brought him to Alex’s place. He shuffles about in place, as Alex reaches for his keys to unlock the door. “So. The puppy…” Robert’s about to ask when Alex cuts him off. “You are going to love him.” He says, as he opens the door and they hear the rough little howls coming from the sitting room.

Though he’s never been the soft soppy type, meeting Aaron had completely changed him, in many ways. Meeting Aaron made him believe in love at first sight because from the moment he had laid eyes on him, he knew deep down that there was something about him. Deep down, he knew he was in love, just as he knew he was in love with the little ball of white and red fur running to him. The small high pitch barks had him melting as it ran around his legs. “Told you.” Alex says. “He’s brilliant!” Robert lets out in excitement as he knelt down to pick up the puppy; a red and white Siberian Husky, with golden eyes. “He’s a mischievous little guy, so you make sure you keep an eye on him at all times.” Alex tells him. “Aaron and Liv are going to be so chuffed!”

It occurred to Robert that it was a good thing Alex had given him a lift to his place to pick up the puppy because he couldn’t keep his hands off puppy. No way could he have made the drive himself, with the puppy in his arms as he bit and licked at his hands and fingers. They’d spent the entire drive throwing out names that started with Game of Thrones characters, it was, after all, the reason he decided on a Siberian Husky, both he and Aaron had been infatuated with the dire wolves from the get-go. He’d almost decided on Jon Snow when he remembered Alex warning him about how mischievous the puppy was and it him. “LOKI!” He shouted.

He thanked Alex for helping him find the puppy, as he waved him goodbye and turned to face his home. The Mill in all its glory, spacious enough for the puppy to grow up in and plenty of gardens to run around. _They are going to flip._ He thinks to himself, as he reaches into his pocket for his phone and begins tapping out a message.

_Robert: You and Liv home?_

_Aaron: Yeah, why? You on your way?_

“Well, here it goes.” He whispered to himself, as he unlocked the door and made his way through the porch and through the door to their flat. He nonchalantly walked through the door with Loki hot on his heels. “Where have you be…” Aaron is in middle of shouting from the kitchen before he notices the little ball of fur zooming around the sitting room, trying to get Robert’s attention. His eyes go wide and his jaw drops, hearts practically forming in his eyes. “ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?” Aaron shouts, practically squealing with glee. The shock catches Loki by surprise and he starts a run of high pitched barks that practically melts Aaron to the ground. “IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS!?” Liv shouts, from the top of the stairs before she barrels down with a smile that rivals Aaron.  

Liv is rolling around the floor with the puppy when Aaron jumps off the floor and into Robert’s arms. He wraps his arms around his neck and plants a hard kiss on his lips. “Robert, he’s amazing.” Aaron lets out, after the kiss. “Yeah? You like him?” He asks. “Yeah.” He quickly nods his head, with a smile on his face. “What’s his name?” Aaron asks kneeling back down next to Liv as he pets the puppy. “Well, he’s apparently mischievous, so I named him Loki.” Aaron raises an eyebrow, confused. “As in the god of mischief.” Robert adds. “You are such a dork.” Liv says as she takes her turn jumping into Robert’s arms for a hug. “I love him.” She says. “Well, you better, for what I paid for him.” He jokes, before adding that she’d be helping take care of him and she willingly agrees. Seeing the smile on their faces makes his heart melt, he’s not sure how he made it to this, but against all odds, he’s made a life for himself that he never knew he could have. A life with a family he never knew he wanted.

 

________

 

 

_MARCH 16 TH_

Sleep deprived and on edge, Robert rubs he eyes, trying to fight the irritation that is only making his eyes feel worse. He takes a deep breath and releases it. “At least I’m almost home.” He whispers to himself, as he reaches for the radio and turning it on. The silence is getting to him and he doesn’t want to let his thoughts run wild. He hated the way he left things with Aaron, hated it so much that after only one meeting, he canceled the rest and booked a flight back home. This was a big deal he had worked out with a firm in London that would greatly benefit not only Home & James Haulage but also Holey Scrap. It had taken him and Nicola weeks’ worth of prep to even get the firm’s interest. Aaron’s last words to him before he left had been eating at him since the moment he stepped outside their home. _He was right._ Is all he could think to himself. 

Robert had spent so much time trying to convince Aaron that he didn’t need to work anymore, he’d even hired Pete and Daz full time at the scrap yard to take up his workload. They were set for life, money was no longer a concern…they could sit back and enjoy life. After everything they had been through, they deserved it. There was no way he could leave things this way, no way he could wait a couple more days to patch things up with Aaron. He had to go back and fix things.

Sleep had evaded him through the night, both waiting for his flight and during, granted it was a short flight. Robert had spent the time deciding to step away from both businesses and he started making plans to sell off their shares in both of them. He knew Nicola and Jimmy were interested in buying him out of his shares in Home & James and that Barton brothers had shown interest in Holey Scrap since their taxi firm crashed. Aaron and Liv, his family, were his number one priority and he would spend the rest of his life cherishing their lives together. With the decision made, a grin spreads across his face as he pulls out his phone and starts tapping away at the screen.

_Robert: I hate the way we left things._

His foot taps away as he waits on his luggage and practically stares a hole through his phone waiting for a response, unsure he’ll get one. _You’re not going to get one at this time of night. It’s 3 in the morning, he’s probably sleeping, you idiot._ He thinks to himself, before sending out another.

_Robert: I can’t leave things this way, I’m coming home. Love you._

As he picks up his luggage from the carousel, a grin spreads across his face again, as he thinks of how he’ll slither into bed and surprise Aaron with some make-up sex. This is what they do, they wind each other up and makeup. All the built-up frustration and annoyance only serves to drives them wild. Sometimes he thinks Aaron likes to pick random fights just so they have something to argue about. 

The drive back home from the airport is short and it’s a good thing because all Robert can think about is what he’s going to do to Aaron when he gets home. He thinks about what a good idea it was to spend the extra money to get the walls soundproofed otherwise Liv would be traumatized for life. He’s so caught in his thoughts that he doesn’t even notice the headlights to his side. He sees Aaron’s beautiful face, his piercing blue eyes, and then blackness and all he hears is the explosion of glass and grinding of metal as the impact hits. 

________

  

It’s just past 4 in the morning, an ungodly time for anyone to be awake. It should be a crime really, but in many cases, it’s the crimes that keep these halls busy. People running about trying to save lives, people crying and desperately waiting for news on their loved ones. It’s one of the reasons that makes his job so hard sometimes. As rewarding as it is to save lives, having to tell someone their loved one has passed can be unbearable.

Alex finds himself walking through the halls at Hotten General making his way out having just ended his shift. He finds himself thinking of everything he sees on a regular basis…lives being saved lives ending too soon, and lives going on. He lost Connor not too long ago and if that loss and his job have taught him anything, it’s that life is too short.

He pulls out his phone and dials before placing it to his ear, at this time of night, or morning more like it, he’s not sure if the call will be answered. “Finn? Sorry to wake you…I, I just had a crappy day and wanted to hear a friendly voice. Yeah, I’m just about to leave. My shift just ended. I’ll probably crash as soon as I get home, but maybe you can stop by later?” He’s speaking as he makes his way to exit the hospital through the Emergency entrances and in the distance, he can hear sirens, getting louder, getting closer.

He can hear Finn is trying to say something, but he can’t quite make it out now, there’s an ambulance pulling up and the sirens are blasting. “Can you hang on? There’s an ambulance, I can’t hear you!” He’s shouting into his phone as he watches the back doors of the ambulance open. Watches as the paramedics pull down the stretcher. Watches as he sees the man on the stretcher and his stomach drops.

He feels as if his last breath has been sucked out suddenly. His heart drops and he’s whispering to himself. “Please…don’t be him. No. No. No. No. No. No.” He’s not even aware that he’s already midstride as he makes for the paramedics as they head towards him, towards the entrance. “OH GOD! ROBERT!” Alex shouts when he’s close enough to see it’s him, when he sees his face covered in blood. “You know him?” One of the paramedics asks. “Yes, he’s a mate.” He lets out before he lets out a barrage of questions. “What happened? Was anyone else with him? His husband? His sister?” He’s caught off guard when he feels a pair of hands on his shoulders. “Alex, I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to move out of the way. Let us take him, we’ll take care of him.” A fellow surgeon tries to calm him. “If you know his family you should inform them.” Alex simply nods, tears in his eyes. “Please, he’s my best mate.” He lets out getting a nod in return. 

“Look mate.” The paramedic comes closer. “We’re not sure exactly what happened, but he was on his own. Didn’t look like there were any passengers with him when the accident happened. It was a t-bone collision. They don’t know how fast the guy that hit him was going, but the wreck was bad, honestly, I don’t even know how he’s still hanging on. I really am sorry mate, I wish I knew more.” He lamented before running off, duty calling.

“HELLO!?” Alex is snapped out of his thoughts, he had forgotten Finn was on the line.

“Finn…I’ll have to call you back. I’m sorry.” He says, ending the call, not even waiting for a response. He quickly opens up his contacts and dials Aaron. “Pick up Aaron. Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up.” He’s whispering to himself, but gets no answer. _He’s probably sleeping. Try again._ He thinks to himself as he paces about the lobby. He redials and tries again. No answer. “Fuck!” His mind starts racing, worried that maybe Aaron was with Robert, maybe the paramedics missed something.

Tears fall from his eyes as he starts to panic thinking of the worst. After Robert practically forced his way into his life they became best mates, something he didn’t expect. He’s never been one for making friends, always too focused on his career, but after Connor, he’d started opening up to the idea and Robert reminded him so much of Connor. He couldn’t lose him as well. Slowly he plucks himself out of his thoughts and goes back to his phone and quickly dials out before placing it to his ear. “FINN! Listen, I need you to go to Aaron’s. Check if he’s there. It doesn’t matter what time it is!” He snaps out. “Robert’s just been brought in, there was an accident and I can’t reach Aaron. I need you to go to his and check if he’s there!”

 

________ 

 

_MARCH 14 TH_

Like clockwork Robert’s up, it’s 4 in the morning and part of him wants to drop dead, but the other part is more than happy to be up. It’s only the 3rd night since they got him, but Loki has him trained already, Robert finds himself up nearly every other hour of the night to take him out for potty breaks. He’s only about 9 weeks old and isn’t able to hold it in for very long, all the research he had done before getting him said so. When Robert Sugden does something, he commits, he goes in prepared. The amount of time he could hold it in would only grow along with him, so he had that to look forward to. _Consider it practice, one day it may be a kid._ He thought to himself. _A family of your own…with Aaron._ The thought brings a smile to his face as he scoops Loki off the floor. “Hey, little man.” He whispers, trying not to wake Aaron up.

The thought was to have gotten the puppy for Liv and Aaron, but Loki seemed to have bonded with him instead. Everywhere he went Loki followed. “Chasing after his mum.” Aaron would joke, not that it bothered him, Robert was in love and besides he had to be up soon anyway. He’d been working with Nicola on trying to land a contract with a firm in London that would bring in some serious money for both Home & James Haulage and Holey Scrap. They had put extra hours trying to nail down the pitch to even catch their interest, loosing him time with Aaron. Robert had cancelled a few date nights with Aaron at the last minute having gotten carried away with work…something Aaron wasn’t too keen on.

“You up already?” Aaron groggily lets out as he lays in bed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t wake you, did I?” Robert replies before he goes back and leans down placing a kiss on Aaron’s forehead. “No…not really. The bed just felt empty.” He says, making Robert smile. “I’m just taking him out for his potty break and then I’m going to head out to the scrap yard to work on that deal I’ve been working with Nicola on.” Aaron groans out as he rolls his eyes. “Rob, just come back to bed.” Robert runs his fingers through Aarons soft bed hair as he purses his lips. “I’m sorry babe, but we really need to get this ready. It’s too good to pass up.” He says, as he cradles Loki in his arm. “Don’t work too hard, yeah?” Aaron starts. “And you know you don’t have to take him with you, you can leave Loki here with me and Liv.” He says as he sits up in bed. “But, he’ll miss me.” Robert replies. “You mean you’ll miss him.” Aaron says smiling.

 

________ 

 

_MARCH 16 TH_

His head is spinning and he can’t seem to catch his breath, everything seems to be overwhelming him, but none of it matters. Robert is all that matters. Aaron jumps out of the car before Finn has even fully parked and he makes a dash for the entrance. “I’m looking for me husband, he was brought in about 40 minutes ago.” He blurts outs as he reaches the nurse’s desk, his heart racing, tears running down his cheeks. “What’s his name?” She asks calmly with sympathy in her eyes, trying to help calm him. “Robert…Robert Sugden.” She looks back down to her computer and starts typing away. He needs to see him, needs to know he’s okay. “Aaron!” Alex shouts running up from the waiting area as he wraps his arms around him. “What’s happened? How is he?” Aaron asks as he throws his arms up placing his hands behind his head lacing his fingers together. “There was a car accident, I was on my way out when I saw them bring him in. He’s in surgery now.”  Alex informs him. “That must have been the wreck we drove past.” Comes from beside Aaron, Finn now standing there. Aaron hadn’t even noticed, he had been too wrapped up in getting to the hospital, too wrapped in his worry for Robert.

“What was he even doing here? He’s supposed to be in London.” Aaron sobs out. Robert wasn’t supposed to be back for a couple of days, this shouldn’t have happened. He’s about to drop to the floor when Alex pulls him into a hug and Aaron lets go, crying into his shoulder for a moment. He has to be strong, has to be there for Robert. “Finn, can I borrow your phone?” He asks. “I need to call me mum.” Finn nods and hands him his phone before Aaron steps away dialing.

“Vic. No, it’s Aaron. No…listen, I’m at Hotten General. Rob’s been in an accident. I don’t know. He’s in surgery right now. I don’t know. Can you please tell me mum? I tried her but she didn’t answer. Yeah, please hurry.” 

It’s not long before Victoria, Adam, Chas, and Faith come barreling in through the doors looking around, trying to find Aaron. Andy, Bernice, Diane, Doug, Debbie, and Paddy follow shortly after and it warms Aaron’s heart knowing that they care for Robert, his Robert. When she catches sight of him Chas quickly runs to Aaron and wraps her arms around him as he breaks down into her shoulder. “Oh, luv. He’s going to be okay, I know he will. He’s a tough one, he is. This is Robert we’re talking about here, the man has taken a bullet to the chest and walked away just fine.” She halfheartedly chuckles. Chas and Robert had a very tumultuous relationship from the start, but most of it was due to her being protective of Aaron. Things have changed since then, they’ve changed drastically, and she loves Robert like a second son. She wants to cry and worry like everyone else, but she has to be strong for Aaron.

 

 

_MARCH 15 TH_

“After you walk him you come back to bed, yeah?” Aaron practically pleads. He hates that he almost feels neglected. Liv’s away and Robert’s been spending so much time working on this deal that he’s hardly spent much time at home. It was hard enough getting Liv to go out and see Sandra as they had previously planned when Robert brought Loki home with him. After finally getting her out he was hoping to enjoy some time alone with his husband. Robert looks back down at him with an apologetic look on his face. “Aaron…you know I can’t.” He says in that soft voice that would make Aaron forgive him for anything…possibly even murder. “This is it though, I promise.” He starts. “We are just putting the final touches on it this morning and then we are hopping on a call with them at noon. If everything goes well, then, it’ll all be over and we can celebrate.” Aaron rolls his eyes and grumbles. “Fine…but you better be back in time for date night, and you’re not taking him with you this time. He’s staying with me.” He says, nodding at Loki.

 

________

  

It’s nearing noon and after a long walk with Loki, Aaron heads to the pub for lunch with the puppy hot on his heels. The moment he walks through the doors Noah spots him, or more like he spots Loki and he runs over. “Can I play with him?” He asks. “Shouldn’t you be in school or something?” Aaron replies. Guilt washes over Noah’s face. “Yeah, but I wasn’t feeling too well so my mom let me stay home.” Aaron chuckles, ruffling Noah’s head. _Must have learned that from Liv._ “You don’t look so sick to me.” He says. “Please don’t tell mom.” Noah pleads. “No worries, mate. Here, why don’t you take him for a bit? You can watch him for me, just keep a close eye on him okay. He’s trouble, this one is.” He says handing over the leash to Noah before taking a seat at the bar. He pulls out his phone to see if there’s any word from Robert, any news on the deal, but he sees there’s no word as of yet and places his phone on the bar.

“What…no Robert?” Chas asks as she walks up and starts pouring him a pint. Aaron, looking a bit disappointed, shakes his head. “He’s working on that deal with Nicola, but today should be it.” He finishes with a smile. “That’s good to hear. You’ve been a bit moody since they started working on that.” Chas replies as she leans forward placing her elbows on the counter. “Have I really?” He asks, suddenly realizing that he must be coming off like a child throwing a tantrum when they don’t get their way.

“I know that look.” Chas says. “What is it? Come on spill it.”

“How does he put up with me?”

“Because he loves you, you idiot. Besides, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend time with your husband. You two have gotten so much better about talking things out, so don’t stop now. If it’s bugging you this much, tell him. Don’t bottle it up.”

Aaron forces out a smile and rolls his eyes. “You’re right.”

Chas smiles from ear to ear, she just loves to hear those words coming from her son. “I know I am. Now, are you hungry?”

Aaron nods. “Yeah, burger.”

 

________

 

 

After his lunch, he’d left Loki with Noah for the afternoon. He took his time explaining how to feed and water him the same way Robert would have. “You make sure you watch him, yeah? If anything happens you call me.” He said before heading back home. Once home he’d spent at least an hour going over what he was going to say to Robert. He tried not to overthink it, but he’s always been so bad about voicing his feelings. So bad he wanted to make sure he was going to make sense. He’s mid-thought when he hears the door open. 

“Aaron, you here?” He hears Robert ask from the entrance.

“Yeah. I’m here.” He says walking from the kitchen towards Robert. “You’re a bit early, wasn’t expecting you home until 5. Is that a bad thing? How’d it go?”

“Actually, it went fantastic!” He says with a beaming smile. “All that hard work paid off. They’ve accepted the deal, they just want to meet in person to sign contracts.”

“That’s amazing. I’m proud of you.” Aaron says as he lunges at him with a hug. “I’m taking you out tonight then. To celebrate.”

It’s almost instantaneous that Robert’s smile falters, he sighs, and his shoulders drop slightly. “Actually…about that.” He starts before pausing, looks like he’s not quite sure how to break the news. “They want to meet first thing in the morning and then they want to have a couple of meetings with their partners out there in London that will all be looped into the deal. Might be a couple of days.”

Aaron winces at the news. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“It’s only a couple days, Aaron. Then it’s all done. I promise.”

“That’s what you said this morning and now it’s a couple more days. What’s to stop it there? What if it becomes just a few more after that?”

“Aaron…”

“No, Robert. All you’ve been doing lately is working. You keep trying to get _me_ to stop working yet all you do is take more on yourself.”

Robert rolls his eyes at that. “What’s so awful about me trying to provide for my family.”

“We don’t even need the money and you know that’s not what I mean so screw you!” Aaron shouts out.

 

________

 

 

_MARCH 16 TH_

 

It’s been an hour since Aaron arrived and still no word. He’s pacing about the waiting area trying to stay calm, but every passing minute is making it harder. He’s suddenly stopped by a hand on his shoulder, Chas now standing beside him. “Have you called Liv?” She asks. He shakes his head as tears roll down his face. “Luv, you have to.” He gulps as he shuts his eyes tight. “I don’t want to freak her out, especially now since we don’t know anything yet.” He lets out. Chas glances around looking at everyone there, afraid to voice what she’s thinking, but she has to. “You have to tell her. She can be here in a few hours if you tell her now. If something happens…” She says before Aaron cuts her off. “Mum, don’t.” She cups his face in her palms and sincerely looks into his eyes. “If something happens and she’s not here, she’ll never forgive you. You may be blood, but you know she loves him just as much. It will break her heart if she…if she doesn’t get a chance to…” She doesn’t finish what she was trying to say, can’t bring herself to say it. A tear breaks free running down her face as Aaron nods. 

“Oh.” Chas says as she reaches into her purse and pulls out his phone. “You left it at the bar yesterday. I shut it off, so the battery wouldn’t run out.” She hands it over and gives him a hug before stepping aside to give him some privacy. He’s wiping at his face trying to clear up his tears, trying to collect himself. He doesn’t want to freak Liv out. He turns his phone on and immediately dials Liv. “Liv. Yeah, I know it’s early. Listen, something’s happened. There’s been an accident. Robert’s been hurt, I need you to come back. Yeah. Yeah. You can use the card we gave you for emergencies, get on the first flight you can. Yeah, I love too.” He’s fighting back tears as he ends the call and his heart drops when he sees that he has missed messages from Robert.

_Robert: I hate the way we left things._

_Robert: I can’t leave things this way, I’m coming home. Love you._

As he finishes reading the last message he feels the sharp pain in his chest, feel like he’s just been stabbed in the heart. He’s been trying to hold it together, but he can’t any longer and everything comes crashing down. “It’s all my fault.” He says as tears start streaming down his face. Chas is back at his side the moment she hears him. “It’s all my fault, mum.” He cries out as she wraps her arms around him. “No, luv. This isn’t your fault.”

“But it is. We had a fight before he left. I was acting like a child and I went off on him because he was working so much.”

“Aaron, it’s okay if you felt like he was working too much. You know that right?”

“It doesn’t matter.” He snaps back. “I shouldn’t have gone off on him like that and you know what’s worse…he was supposed to be gone for a couple of days. He shouldn’t have even been here, but he couldn’t leave things the way they were, he cancelled the meetings and came back. If he…” He stops, he can’t even say it. “The last thing he said to me is that he loves me…you want to know what the last thing I said to him was? I was shouting at him and I said _screw you._ ” He says before he walks off.

“Aaron, wait.” Chas tries calling out to him to no avail.

He’s not quite sure how he found his way to it and he’s never been the type, but he makes his way into the hospital chapel and he finds himself lucky that there’s no one else inside. He heads over to one of the benches and takes a seat where he sits in silence for a few minutes not quite sure of what to do or what to say before he takes a deep breath and the words start spilling out. “I don’t even know what to say really.” He pauses for a moment as he drops his head. “My life’s been rough, but you know that, and you know what? It’s okay. It’s okay because I’ve made peace with it, I’ve moved on, I’ve learned to live with what’s happened to me, but most important of all is that it led me to him. I can forgive everything that’s happened to me because I have him, because he’s in my life. He makes me forget about all the bad, he makes me feel like I’m complete. Like I’m a whole person. Please…please don’t take him from me.” Aaron whispers to himself, as tears run down his face.

 

________

 

It’s close to 2 hours later that Aaron turns back up at the waiting room and Liv arrives shortly after carrying bags that she drops the moment she sees Aaron and runs to him for a hug. “Why didn’t you call me? Tell me you were here, could’ve picked you up.” He says. “Figured it would just be faster this way.” Liv replies. “What happened?” She asks, fighting back her own tears. “We don’t know all the details, but it was a car accident. Someone ran straight into the driver’s side head first. He’s been in surgery for a while, but we don’t have any news yet.” He tells her as he gently squeezes into her, needing the comfort even more than she does.

They’re all having some coffee 20 minutes later when Alex suddenly calls out to Aaron as he nods his head towards an incoming Doctor.

“Robert Sugden’s family?” He asks as Aaron quickly makes his way over, Chas and Victoria right behind him. “Yeah, he’s my husband.”

 

________

  

There’s a slight buzz in his head, he’s not quite sure what’s brought it on, but he lazily cracks his eyes open to see the soft glow coming through the window. There’s a beam of light breaking through the curtains that’s filling the room with a beautiful warm glow and as he looks down from it he sees the soft black curls of Aaron’s hair, his head resting on his chest. He reaches his head down a bit and breaths him in before pulling him in closer. For a brief moment he remembers being in his car heading home and then nothing, but he’s here now with Aaron and that’s all that matters. There’s nowhere in the world he’d rather be. He kisses the top of Aaron's head as he runs his fingers down Aaron's arms tracing the scars left behind from all those years of self-harming. Aaron jokes about how he knows every freckle on his body, what he doesn’t know is that Robert knows every scar on his. Part of learning them all came from worry, wanting to always be aware if he saw any new ones, but part of it simply because he needed to know every inch of him. “I love you so much.” He whispers into Aaron’s hair before he starts to hear the faint sound…the voice. There’s something so familiar about it.

“My Robert.” He hears the familiar voice call out and his eyes go wide when he realizes who the voice belongs to. He quickly sits up, but Aaron’s no longer there. Confusion hits him and again he remembers being in his car on his way back home. He remembers seeing the lights coming towards him.

“Mum.” He calls out.

“Yes, love.” She answers.

“Where are you?”

“I’m always with you my sweet Robert. I’ve always been there and I’m so proud of you.”

A smile spreads across his face as tears break loose from his eyes hearing those words.

“My sweet boy, you’ve had a long journey, a very difficult one and against everything you still grew up to be such an amazing man. I couldn’t be prouder of you. You’ve earned your rest.”

Those words are bittersweet, hearing her tell him how proud she is of him moves him more than he ever thought possible, but the mention of rest reels him back in. He remembers the accident. He remembers the crash. The faint sounds of an ambulance, the faint sounds of machines beeping.

“There’s no shame in letting go. You’ve fought for so long, you’ve earned your some peace.”

“But…but, Aaron. I don’t want to leave him. I love him.”

“I know you do, sweetheart, but sometimes love isn’t enough to keep you around. Sometimes it can't fix your wounds. You don’t have to be scared, I’ll be with you every step of the way, just take my hand. You can let go.”

  

________

 

Aaron stands beside Robert’s bed, the room is still and quiet, all he can hear are the machines running. The heart monitor going at its steady beep, a grim reminder of the last time Robert was in this position. He winces at the memory of him telling Robert to hurry up and die as tears roll down his face. He shakes the bad memory away. “What is it with us and hospitals, huh?” He chuckles out. “They should probably name a wing after one of us.”

He takes one of Robert’s hands into his, lacing their fingers together. “Robert, you fight. Okay. You’re a fighter, you always have been and I’m going to need you to fight.” Tears are freely running down his face, he’s not even bothering trying to wipe them away. “Don’t you dare leave me. You’re supposed to stick around till you’re at least 80, remember?” He says, as he leans down and places a kiss to his lips. He’s about to signal Liv to come in when he feels Robert’s fingers give and the beeping of the machine becomes erratic moments before it flatlines. “ROBERT! NO! NO! NO!” He’s yelling “Please don’t leave me!” He’s frantically shouting, as the doctors rush in and begin pushing him out.

The moment he’s out of the room he rushes over to the window to watch. “What’s going on?!” Everyone asks, and all Aaron can do is pull Liv into his arms and cry as he watches through the window, watches as the doctors try to resuscitate Robert, watches as the heart monitor flatlines and all he can remember as he hears the never-ending beep are his last words to Robert, “screw you.”

 

 

 

 


	18. You Threaten Him, You Threaten Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy. Feels like a bit of a roller coaster.
> 
> Please feel free to leave comments and let me know what you think.

 

Sarah calls out, she asks him to take her hand. She promises to be there with him, that everything will be alright. With every word she speaks, she brings a warmth that soothes him in ways he never thought he’d feel again. Robert closes his eyes letting the feeling run over him just as he reaches for her hand and it’s then when he hears it. He hears him calling out. He’s not sure where it’s coming from, but he knows who it is. “I’ve missed you so much, mum. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of you. There isn’t a day where I don’t’ wish you were still around…so I could hug ya, ask you for advice, tell you about what makes me happy.” He pauses for a moment as a smile spreads across his face. “So, I could tell you about Aaron, about Liv, so you could see how Vic’s grown.” He stops holding back tears. “I love you, mum, but I can’t. I can’t leave him. I won’t.” He tells her before Sarah stands in front of him with a smile. The same smile that always made his worries go away. He feels the same warmth it always filled him with as she reaches up taking his face in between her palms, she gently pulls his head down and places a kiss on his forehead. “I really am proud of you, Robert.” She says with one final smile and then everything goes black.

Throughout the bustling of the hospital and everyone about all she can hear is the deafening sound of the drawn-out beep. That horrid sound that signals the loss of a life. Her vision has become blurry behind the tears in her eyes and she can’t watch anymore so she buries her face into Aaron’s chest. This isn’t how it should be, it’s not how things were supposed to go. This is her family. She finally has a real family, a proper one and now she’s losing part of it. “He can’t die, Aaron. He can’t.” Liv cries into his chest and even though Aaron wants to comfort her, wants to be strong for her, he can’t. He’s numb, he’s not even sure how he’s standing.

After everything that life has thrown his way he managed to find the love of his life. The one person he could see spending the rest of his life with. His soulmate. Now all he can do is stand by as he’s ripped away from him. “DON’T GIVE UP ON ME, ROBERT! YOU FIGHT, YOU HEAR ME. YOU FIGHT!” He shouts as he slams his palm against the window, watching as the doctors try to resuscitate Robert.

As if his cries are answered the beep comes to a halt before it resumes in a rhythmic pattern and he finally collapses at the sound nearly taking Liv down with him. He hugs her at the waist squeezing gently as he holds his breath, waiting. He can hear everyone else nearly cheer in relief, but he hangs back. He needs to know it’s for real, needs to know it’s going to hold. He’s taking a deep breath when someone collapses onto his back, hugging him from behind. “He’s going to be alright, luv.” Chas says into his shoulder. “Of course, he is. This is Robert flipping Sugden after all.” Paddy adds as the doctor steps out of the room. “We are going to take him back for a few scans to make sure everything is okay. He’s not out of the woods just yet, but he seems to be stable now. We’re going to make sure he stays that way.” He says as he places a hand on Aaron’s shoulder trying to reassure him. “He’s a fighter.” The doctor adds. Aaron nods at the words as the doctor turns and follows the others as they wheel Robert’s bed away.

“Mr. Dingle.” DS Hart calls out walking towards Aaron alongside DS Wise. Aaron lightly shakes his head at her in response. “Not Dingle…it’s Sugden.” He corrects her, earning a smile from both Chas and Liv. 

“Well then, Mr. Sugden, I’m afraid we need to chat.” Aaron is taken aback, confused. “Is this about the accident?” He asks, drained, both physically and emotionally. He’s not sure he can deal with this right now. “Can we do this another time?” He says as DS Wise steps up placing a hand on Aaron’s shoulder. “Aaron, I’m afraid it wasn’t an accident. Someone’s made an attempt at his life and Robert may still be in danger.”

He’s already a mess of emotions after the last several hours yet he still feels his stomach drop. “What do you mean it wasn’t an accident?” Aaron frantically asks. “It would be best if we go somewhere private to…” DS Wise is in the middle of saying when Chas cuts him off. “For god sakes, Jason…just tell us what’s going on?” She barks out grabbing everyone’s attention.

“Look I get that you are all worried, all on edge, but we are now looking at an open investigation for attempted murder. We cannot openly discuss this.” DS Hart adds.

Aaron had refused to go down to the police station, no way was he leaving. The doctor had already informed them that he wasn’t out of danger so there was zero chance of him going far from Robert. Luckily DS Hard had procured them an empty family room to ensure they had the privacy needed to proceed. Aaron and Chas sat side by side on a small sofa with DS Hard and Wise in chairs across from them.

“So, what’s going on?” Aaron was first to break the silence that hung in the air. DS Wise looks over to Hart as if waiting for approval and as she gives him a nod he begins. “DS Hart was called to the scene of the crash because it appeared to have been a hit and run. There were no driver or passengers found in the vehicle that smashed into Robert’s and the thorough search turned up a small blood trail. Unfortunately, we didn’t find anyone, but the area is still being searched. We did however find a GoPro camera and the video files on it prove they were trying to kill Robert.” DS Wise informs them.

“Who? Who was trying to kill him!?” Aaron shouts.

 

________

 

  

Liv stands outside the family room trying to listen in on what’s going on inside. She’s trying to stay calm, trying to stay positive. She’s terrified of losing Robert, of having her family fall apart, luckily Alex has been keeping her updated. He had stuck around, waiting with everyone and snuck around to find out how Robert was doing. He was close with most of the techs, so he was able to sneak in and take a personal look at the scans. Besides the broken arm and leg, everything else looked clear. The damage that was caused by the piece of door frame that impaled him through his side has been repaired, and luckily it had missed all major organs and was easily removed. The MRI scans showed nothing that wasn’t already taken care of, he was clear for now. Her family was safe…for now.

As she stands by the door she hears Aaron shouting, asking who was trying to kill Rob when she feels her phone buzzing in her pocket and reaches for it. She’d been so occupied with everything that’s going on that she didn’t notice her phone going off throughout the entire time. She knows that what’s going on at the moment there at the hospital is all that matters, but seeing that she has multiple missed calls and several unread messages from Gerry, she gives in. Message after message from Gerry asking her to call him…whatever it is it’s urgent, it’s a matter of life and death.

_Gerry: Liv, please call me back._

_Gerry: Seriously! I’m not kidding._

_Gerry: Please Liv!_

_Gerry: I think Robert’s dead!_

It’s that last message that breaks something inside of her…makes her see red. Gerry’s her mate…is he responsible for what’s happened to Robert? She quickly ducks into an empty corridor, its quiet and no one’s around, any medical staff that’s afoot are too busy speaking with patients. She quickly dials Gerry back and she finds herself shouting into her phone the moment he answers. “WHAT DID YOU DO?! I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS…IF ROBERT DOESN’T MAKE IT…YEAH, HE’S HANGING ON FOR NOW…What? Why? YOU NEED TO TELL THE POLICE! IF YOU DON’T I WILL! GERRY?! GERRY?” Liv holds her phone back and notices Gerry had ended the call. She loses her cool and runs back to the family room barging straight through the door, not caring that she’s not supposed to be in there, not caring that both Aaron and Chas are staring her down.

“IT WAS LACHLAN! LACHLAN TRIED TO KILL ROBERT!”

 

________ 

 

 

_MARCH 15 TH_

It’s half midnight and there’s a briskness to the air. It’s a quiet night, as it should be. It’s been hours since the locals have all settled in for the night, the only noise around comes in the form of Tracy and Vanessa as they try and drag Leyla out on a girl’s night out. Vanessa having been recently outed by Charity was encouraged by Robert of all people, to get out and experiment, to have fun. Between going out barhopping, in hopes of meeting someone or having Tracy set her up with a friend, she chooses the safer route. No way was she trusting Tracy in setting her up…again.

Looking on at the ladies squealing about as they hop into Vanessa’s car, he shakes his head. “Like lunatics.” Gerry mumbles to himself as he waits outside the B&B. Part of him still unsure why he’s stuck around the village for so long after the Whites kicked him out while the other part knows he doesn’t really have anywhere else to go. He’ll have to settle for the fact that he’s managed to land some work in odd jobs for Doug at the B&B where he’s currently residing and some stable work for the current owners at Home Farm. Then there’s also the fact that he has at least one friend in the form of Liv, much to both Aaron and Robert’s displeasure. 

 _Come on. What’s taking so long?_ He’s thinking to himself when the black SUV pulls up. _Looks like someone has inherited mums truck_. “About time.” He complains, hopping into the passenger seat of the truck as Lachlan stares him down. “Quit the whining, you knew I was driving over from Leeds.” Lachlan sneers.

Lachlan had left the village along with Chrissie and Rebecca shortly after Lawrence’s death and though he’d scarcely had contact with Gerry, this would be the first time he’d made an appearance in Emmerdale since their departure. “How’s about a few drinks? I know the owner at a bar out in Hotten. We can knock back a few before we get to the real fun.” There’s a coldness to him, to his eyes, even more so than before. Throughout their stay in Emmerdale he had grown a reputation for being crazy, a bit unhinged, so the thought of him being even colder than before was making Gerry a bit uncomfortable. Unfortunately for him, he’s a bit short on mates so he can’t really complain. “Sure. Sounds good. Maybe we’ll run into Layla. I overheard her and her mates talking about hitting some bars out in Hotten tonight.” Gerry says, wiggling his eyebrows. He’s been keen on her since he saw her in the wedding dress back when Megan was doing the shoot at Home Farm. “As if she’d even give you a second look.” Lachlan huffs out.

Gerry brushes off the comment, the way he always did when Lachlan would put him down. He’s not even sure why he considered him a mate, then he remembers how deep his pockets were and he’s always up for free drinks. This time however is a different story, this time he regrets even answering Lachlan’s call. Somehow, he’s managed to suck all the fun out of even the free drinks. Everything coming out of his mouth is a complaint. A complaint about how miserable he is. A complaint about Robert Sugden.

“Home Farm was supposed to be mine one day and he just sells it off like it was nothing!” He shouts. “He didn’t even want it. He comes into our lives, pretending he cares about mum, about me, about grandad, and he just ruined all our lives.”

“You still on about all that. Didn’t your mum move on? Thought they were okay?” Gerry replies partially rolling his eyes. He’s sick of hearing this. It’s always the same with Lachlan. Always about Robert. Always about how he ruined their lives, even though everyone but him had moved on. Even though everyone had forgiven each other. “And that’s the worst part. Mum and Aunt Becca just go on about their lives like nothing’s happened. Like everything’s okay.”

“Then, maybe it’s time you did the same, mate. I think you’re getting obsessed.” 

“I’M NOT OBSESSED!” Lachlan shouts, slamming his fist to the table.

Gerry throws his hands up in defeat. “Whoa. Okay. You’re not obsessed.” Gerry starts, trying to keep on Lachlan’s barely existent good side. “So, what do you want to do? You want to play some pranks on him or something?” He asks, getting nothing but a smirk in return.

After a few hours of drinking and Lachlan venting, they hop back into the truck and start their drive back into the village. “Here, you hold this and start recording.” Lachlan says as he shoves a Go Pro camera into Gerry’s hands. “What’s this for?” He asks.

“I want to see the look on his face when we get him. I want to be able to watch it over and over.” Lachlan says with that cold blank expression. It’s void of any emotion and it’s making Gerry uneasy. “Haha, yeah. Good one, bro.” He halfheartedly chuckles.

They’re about 15 minutes outside of the village when Gerry spots it. It’s still dark out, but there’s enough ambient light that he can see it. “Hey. Look.” He points out at a car driving down the intersecting road. “That’s his car, isn’t it? Robert’s?” Gerry asks as he turns to look at Lachlan, notices the crazed smile on his face. “Thank you, Robert.” Lachlan says dragging out every word as if he’s enjoying all of this. “You’ve made this so much easier.” Again, that look spreads across his face only this time he also has that crazed smile. Something about this feels very wrong, it’s making Gerry feel the sweat in his palms. He’s just now noticing the sweat dripping from his forehead, the clamminess he feels throughout his body, the sudden panic that’s hitting him. The panic that only amplifies when he feels the speed pick up. When it speeds up drastically.

“Whoa! Lachlan, what are you doing, mate?” He asks quickly, getting no response. “Lachlan, stop! If you’re trying to scare him this isn’t the right way!” He’s almost shouting as his panic grows by the second. As they grow closer and closer to Robert’s car. “LACHLAN! STOP! STOP IT! YOU’RE GOING TO GET US KILLED! LACHLAN!” He’s shouting before he reaches for the steering wheel and jerks it to the side slightly right before everything goes black.

The side of his head must have hit the dashboard, there’s a slight ringing in his ear as he feels the buzz in his head, he tries to shake it off, but it’s only making this worse. It takes a moment for him to get his bearings and it’s only then that he feels the warm liquid running down his face. He wipes at it realizing its blood, realizing there’s a gash on his temple as it’s left stinging after the wipe. There’s an ache all over his body, but he can move. He reaches for his seatbelt, unbuckling it before he opens his door and steps out. _Oh fuck! Oh fuck!_ He thinks to himself when he sees Robert’s car. “Oh god…what did we do?” He lets out quietly as he spots Lachlan on the passenger side of Robert’s car. He’s just standing there looking through the window, with that same look on his face.

Gerry finally works up the courage to walk up to Robert’s car to look in and his stomach drops when he sees it. “Oh fuck! There’s a piece of the door frame going right through him. Through his side. There’s blood everywhere! Lachlan! Do you hear me?! I think he’s dead!” He shouts, and all Lachlan does is laugh in response.

“You fucking psycho! I’m calling this in, calling an ambulance!” He shouts and suddenly Lachlan is on him taking a swing. The swing lands to the side of Gerry’s head and he finally snaps, shoving Lachlan off him and just as quickly is on top of him swinging back, he’s gotten several hits in when Lachlan starts laughing maniacally. “YOU ARE A FUCKING LUNATIC!” Gerry shouts as he takes one final swing and runs for the truck. He picks up his phone from the floorboard and throws the GoPro under the truck before Lachlan can see.

 

________

 

“Yeah, we know. They’ve just told us. How do you know?” Aaron lets out scrunching his brows. She looks between Aaron and DS Hart a couple of times, she doesn’t want to feel like she’s grassed Gerry. “Liv, please.” At his plead she finally nods at Aaron. “Gerry told me. He’s the one that called the ambulance to the crash. He said there was a video, that he threw it under the truck, so Lachlan wouldn’t find it.” 

DS Hart stands from her seat making her way to Liv. “Do you know where he is now?” She asks. Liv shakes her head in response. “He’s afraid he’s going to get banged up for this. That he’ll be blamed for it.”

DS Wise joins in to Liv’s side. “No, that won’t be happening. By the sounds of it, it’s thanks to him that Robert made it in. It’s also thanks to him that we have everything that we’ll need to put Lachlan away for a long time.” He says, reassuring her. “But we do need to speak to him. We need to know everything, and we need to know where Lachlan is.” Liv nods, knowing that Gerry is off the hook makes this so much easier.

 

________

 

Aaron pinches at the bridge of his nose, the circles under his eyes giving away his exhaustion. “You need to go get some rest, luv.” Chas says as she rubs his back. “How can I?” He almost sneers. “I’m…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say it that way.” He hates that he just snapped at her, hates that his emotions have gotten the better of him. As usual his face gives him away. “There’s no need to apologize. I can’t begin to imagine what’s going through your head right now.” She says just as Aaron sighs deeply, trying to hold back the tears that are fighting at the edges of his eyes. “I can’t lose him. I don’t think I can survive it.” He drops into her arms and sobs into her shoulder as she clings tightly to him. “You won’t lose him Aaron. He’ll come through like he always does. Right as rain. You two will grow old and saggy together.” She says, getting a small chuckle from him.

“Alright, I think I have everything I need here.” DS Hart announces as she finishes questioning Liv. “I’ll be in touch.” She adds before excusing herself leaving the room.

“Aaron.” Alex calls out as he steps inside. “They’ve finished up with him and will be bringing him back down soon. You’ll be able to see him in about an hour.” He says as Aaron walks over and pulls him into a hug. He shakes his head at himself, very aware at just how common hugging has become to him. At what a soft bloke he’s become. “Thanks, mate. Thanks for everything.” He says earning an eye roll from Alex. “No need for any of that, Aaron. You guys are like family.” Aaron gives him a small smile. “Still, you didn’t have to do all of this, you don’t have to stick around. I’m sure you’re knackered, you should go home and get some rest.”

“No change. What kind of a friend would I be? You know damn well that Rob would do the same.” Trying to lighten the mood, he decides to change the subject, trying to keep Aaron positive. “How’s Loki doing?”

“Shit!” He silently lets out as he runs from the room, quickly making for the waiting area and takes Adam by the arm, dragging him along.

 

________

 

His nerves are a wreck and he scolds himself for driving like a maniac, after everything that has just happened this is the last thing he should be doing. He tells himself it doesn’t matter though, he needs to be there when Robert wakes. He’d almost asked Adam to run back to the Mill and check up on Loki, but all he could think of was the earful he’d get from Robert for forgetting him in the first place. The thought alone brings a smile to his face. _He’s going to be alright. I know it._ He thinks to himself as they arrive in the village.

“Oi.” Adam snaps him out of his thoughts. “You see that?” He’s asking pointing at smoke they see floating to the sky. Aaron feels his stomach drop when he realizes where its coming from and he speeds up. As they pull up to the Mill, they see the fire and Aaron quickly jumps out of the car in a panic. “Adam call…” He starts to say. “Already on it.” Adam cuts him off before Aaron makes a dash for his home. The fire is already out of control and he can feel the heat emanating from it. He notices the entrance is still clear when he hears the muffled yelps from Loki. Without hesitation he bursts through the door and re-emerges only minutes later with Loki in hands before dropping to his knees in the garden coughing.

“You mad?” Adam shouts as he runs to his side. “Had to get this little guy, didn’t I?” Aaron responds. Adam’s looking back at him with a sad look on his face, with sympathy. “Look, mate. I’m sorry, this is the last thing you guys need.” Aaron simply shakes his head. “Don’t be. He’s safe.” He says, nodding his head down towards Loki. “Besides, there’s more important things. That’s just a house. It can be replaced.” He says with a heavy heart. He knows what he says is true, but part of him still feels the loss of his home. He’s already walking back towards Adam’s car when fire trucks pull up and immediately start taming the fire.

He’s so distracted that he doesn’t notice when David appears by his side, he lets him know that he’d seen the fire shortly after it started and immediately called it in. “Thanks, mate.”

Aaron is leaning against the car when Adam comes back up to him. “Listen, I can stay here. I’ll handle this okay. You go back, you need to be there when he wakes up. I’ll keep posted on this, yeah?” Aaron nods and hops back in the car. He doesn’t need to be told twice.

It’s close to an hour after he left the hospital when he makes it back. Chas and Liv rushing to his side. “What happened? Where did you go?” They ask, Liv paying close attention to the duffle bag Aaron is carrying. “They’ve just put him back in his room, luv.” Chas says as she nods her head towards the room. “We thought we’d give you a few minutes. Figured you should be the first person he sees when he wakes.” Aaron smiles and makes for the door before Liv pulls at his free arm. “You sneaking him in, aren’t you?” She asks getting a wink from Aaron in return.

As he walks back in the room he unzips the bag before reaching in and lifting Loki out. He ruffles the puppy’s head an and walks over to the bed placing him on it and he melts a bit when he sees him instinctively circle around before laying across Robert’s feet. It’s almost as if he was on guard duty. Aaron finally pulls up a chair to the left side of the bed and takes Robert’s hand in his, lacing their fingers together. “Robert, you need to wake up. I need you to pull through this. I can’t make it without ya…I’m so sorry for the way I behaved and I’m so sorry for the things I said. I was such an arse.” He says and lets it linger for a moment before he hears a weak yet clear chuckle. “Yeah, you were.” Quietly comes from Robert’s lips and Aaron jumps of his seat nearly throwing himself at Robert. He runs his fingers through his golden locks and places a soft kiss to his lips before lightly pulling back and places his forehead to Rob’s.

“But…you were right.” Robert says.

“What do you mean?” Aaron asks.

“I was working all the time, even when I kept trying to get you to stop. I’m sorry.”

“You are such an idiot, you know that? Here you are in a hospital bed after nearly dying on me, and _you_ are apologizing to _me._ ” Aaron says, before letting out a small laugh. “Don’t you _ever_ do that to me again, you hear?” He practically orders. Robert nods his head and smiles. “I hope you don’t mind, but I brought you a guard dog.” Aaron jokes, then quickly regrets letting that slip. Robert smiles before looking down at his feet to see Loki resting there and Aaron quietly sighs in relief, hoping Robert didn’t overthink his comment. True to fashion Robert quickly reads the look on Aaron’s face, he knows him too well. “What do you mean guard dog? What is he guarding me from?”

There’s no point in lying. He hates lying, hates keeping secrets, especially from Robert. He deserves to know the truth. Deserves to know that Lachlan tried to kill him and more importantly that he’s still out there. He takes a deep breath and looks Robert straight in the eyes. “There’s something you need to know.” He starts, before taking a seat again. “Do you remember anything…about what happened?” He asks. Robert shakes his head. “No, not really. I remember driving, was almost to the village, and then I think I remember lights coming at me…car accident, yeah?”

Aaron shakes his head now. “Wasn’t an accident…shit.” He pauses for a moment. “I…I don’t know how to tell you this, but it was Lachlan. He was trying to kill ya, they’re still looking for him.”

Robert closes his eyes taking all of it in and takes a deep breath. “So, they know for sure it was him? Does Chrissie know? And what do you mean they’re still looking for him?”

“Yeah, they know it was him. He recorded the whole thing like an idiot, but they haven’t found him. As for Chrissie, no, not that I know of. We’ve all been worried sick for ya, it never crossed our minds, but I’m pretty sure Jason has probably called her in by now. They’ll probably want to question her.” Robert takes a deep breath and winces at the pain, it’s only now that he realizes that both his right arm and leg are in casts. Aaron strokes his hand along Robert’s face tenderly. “You need to take it easy, okay? You’re lucky to be alive. Both your right arm and leg are broken plus a piece of the door frame impaled you through your side, so you’re going to have a major scar there. They said you’d just about bled out when they got to you…god, Robert. I thought I’d lost you.” Aaron says with tears running down his face, moments before Loki starts to growl, in defense mode. They’ve never seen him this way.

“You haven’t lost him yet, but I can fix that.” Lachlan hisses out as he sneaks into the room, pointing a gun at Robert. Aaron quickly shoots off his seat standing in front of Robert. “tsk tsk tsk. You really wanna die for him, mate.” Lachlan sneers out. “He really worth it?”

“I ain’t your mate you little shit. I told you once, you threaten him, you threaten me.”

“No…you know what? This is better. Actually, it couldn’t be any more perfect, could it? If I kill you instead, he’ll have to live with that.”

“No. You want me, I’m right here. Easy target. I can’t move, can’t go anywhere. Just leave Aaron out of this. I won’t fight you.” Robert begs.

“Shut up Robert. I’m not letting him kill ya.”

“SHUT UP! THE BOTH OF YOU! MAYBE I’LL JUST KILL YOU BOTH.” Lachlan shouts, he’s clearly lost it.

Everything about his demeanor is deranged from the sound of his voice to the look on his face. Everyone always joked about him not being right in the head, but no one knew just how true it was. He starts walking closer to Aaron pointing the gun straight at him. He’s so lost in his head, so lost in the idea of killing them the he didn’t even notice someone enter the room behind him.

“Lachlan put the gun down.” Chrissie pleads. “You’re not right, Lachlan. Put the gun down before you do something you can’t take back. We can get you some help.”

Lachlan laughs at her pleads and only waves the gun in Aaron’s face as a protest. “No, they ruined our lives, they are not getting away with that.” He says.

“Lachlan, no one ruined our lives. We’ve moved on, they’ve moved on. Please stop this.” She says, softly trying to keep him calm. “Look at me.” She pleads, and he slightly turns his head to look her in the eyes. Aaron takes the opening and grabs a hold of Lachlan’s wrist aiming the gun straight up so it’s not pointing near anyone and uses his free arm to deck him. He lands a hit right to his jaw, flooring him and he’s on top of him just as quickly taking a second swing making Lachlan lose grip of the gun. “Chrissie, go get Jason, he should be out there with mum!” Aaron shouts. She hesitates for a moment and then nods. “Please don’t hurt him.” She says, before she quickly runs out yelling for help.

“You almost killed him you little psycho, tell me why I shouldn’t put you out of your fucking misery, and do the world a favor.” Aaron sneers out, before he hears Robert grunt in pain as he hits the floor. He’s trying to get up, trying to get to Aaron. “Aaron, stop. Don’t hurt him. Let the police deal with him.” Aaron’s worried, doesn’t want Robert getting any more hurt than he already is and he hesitates enough that Lachlan manages to shove him off. Aaron lands next to Robert and Lachlan smiles. “Perfect, two birds, one stone.” He says, as he reaches for the gun, he’s almost gotten it when he feels the small sharp teeth breaking the skin on his hand, Loki biting down with as much force as he can at his small size. Lachlan screams in pain and quickly shoves the puppy aside and reaches for the gun that’s no longer there.

“If you so much as move, I’ll blow your brains out, you freaking psycho.” Liv stands behind him holding the gun. “You don’t have the guts.” Lachlan teases, as he tries to move. Liv simply shakes her head and cocks the guns. “Try me.” She says, practically challenging him. “Liv, you just keep him in place okay? Jason will be here in a second.” Aaron tells her, just before DS Wise walks in, taking the gun from Liv.

“Lachlan White, you are under arrest for the attempted murder of Robert and Aaron Sugden.”

 

 

 


	19. So, We Gonna Finish This?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's taken so long for this update, but went back and forth between changes to this chapter and how it would affect the next one. Managed to work it out and condense this one so I can do one more proper chapter to end.
> 
> Now updated with edits.

 

The last 12 hours had been nothing short of taxing, between Lachlan’s attempt at Robert’s life and his corresponding arrest, Robert was still weak, and Aaron hadn’t really slept since Robert left after their fight. Since before the accident. DS Hart had stopped by several times to take statements from everyone, much to Aaron’s annoyance. All he wanted was for Robert to rest and recuperate, he argued that there would be plenty of time for statements once Robert was well and back home, not that he was sure if they had a home to go back to. Adam had promised him to stay behind and take care of everything at the Mill, so Aaron could get back to Robert before he woke up. _Thank you, Adam!_ He’d thought to himself. If it wasn’t for Adam volunteering to stay behind who knows what could’ve happened. Aaron’s curled up on the sofa chair near the edge of the room trying to get some shut-eye, he desperately needed sleep, but there was no way he was going anywhere else. The chair would have to do. If Robert could do it, as he remembers waking up to Robert sleeping on a chair much like this one back when he’d been the one hurt, so could he.

Luckily Robert had been sedated to help him sleep after the ordeal and he’d been out of it since shortly after Lachlan’s arrest. He’d hurt himself further crashing to the floor, nearly broke the bones that had just been repaired trying to get to Aaron. The doctor had previously informed Aaron that Robert would have a long road to recovery and that was before he’d gone and hurt himself again, who knows how much longer they’d now be set back.

The soft humming of the monitors and stillness of the room had nearly lulled him to sleep when he hears the small grumble, he looks over to see Loki lifting his head in attention as he lays across Robert’s legs, his ears perking up further and slowly curving back. Aaron’s breath drops for a moment, fearing the worst, as the door slowly swings open and Adam walks in. As he nods his head at Aaron, Loki lets his head drop again and goes back on guard duty. Aaron had to have Robert moved to a private room the moment they tried to have him take Loki home. “No way, not going to happen. He’s going to stay and watch over him.” He’d argued with the nurses who eventually gave in and decided to let them keep him there so long as it didn’t cause any problems. Not that he really had to put up much of an argument, the nurses were all smitten not only with Loki but with both Aaron and Robert.

“Hey bro, you got a minute?” Adam quietly calls out from the doorway waiting, Aaron nods his head in response and Adam walks into the room. Aaron quietly stands and walks over to Loki gently ruffling his head. “You keep an eye on him, yeah?” He whispers before stepping over to Adam. “So, you want the good news or the bad news?” Adam asks as Aaron walks over to him. Not quite sure which he wants to hear first, he decides he might as well start with the bad. “Guess we might as well start off with the bad.” Adam nods in response. “Yeah, okay. So, the bad news, the spare flat has been pretty much destroyed, but it gets worse. After you left, Gerry came round, looks like Lachlan started the fire. Wanted to distract everyone watching over Rob so he could sneak over unnoticed.” Aaron winces at the news, deep down he had a feeling Lachlan had something to do with it. He takes a deep breath and braces himself for what’s to come as Adam continues. “The good news…our little hero Gerry fought him off, managed to scare him off before he could start the fire to yours. Still, there was a bit of damage done to yours, mostly superficial, but the fire department said that about 90 percent of the fire was contained to the spare flat. Best part, no structural damage.” He says grinning, knows how much of a win Rob and Aaron needed right now. Aaron sighs in relief, not so much worried about the Mill as they can rebuild, but relieved that they didn’t lose the memories within. His wedding photo comes to mind, the picture of the three of them from last Christmas, the framed picture he had snuck of a tender moment between Robert and Chas. Those could not be replaced. “You going to tell him?” Adam asks pulling him back from his thoughts. Aaron nods.

“Thank you, Adam. I don’t know what would have happened if I hadn’t gotten back, if I’d stayed behind to take care of things over there…with the fire.” Aaron says, trying not to think of the possibilities. Their home was important, it meant so much to them. It’s something they’ve built together as a family, but at the end of the day it can be replaced, Robert can’t. “Yeah, I heard. Vic just told me everything that happened. She had sent me a message earlier, but I didn’t know it was this bad, this insane. He really was demented that kid, wasn’t he?” Adam says it as more of a statement than a question. Everyone knew Lachlan wasn’t right, ever since Alicia, and even before then, everyone could tell there was something off about him. “He deserves whatever he gets.” Adam adds before Aaron pulls him into a hug. “Thanks again, for everything. I don’t know what I’d do without you, mate.” Adam squeezes back gently and chuckles, making jokes about how soft Aaron’s gone over the last year. Aaron still finds it in himself to chuckle back. “Yeah, well blame it on that idiot over there.” He says looking towards Robert. “Oi…I heard that.” They hear Robert quietly quip back. “I’ll let you two get to it then.” Adam says gently squeezing at Aaron’s shoulder before walking back out, giving them privacy.

As Aaron comes to Robert’s side he runs his fingers through Robert’s hair before leaning in and gently kissing his lips. “So, how much of that did you hear?” He asks. “Not much really, not even sure if I’m fully awake, but I did catch you calling me an idiot though.” He says softly chuckling. “Well, ya are. I mean, what were you thinking? Trying to get up? Trying to be a hero, like usual?” Aaron jokes, he knows he has to tell Robert about the Mill, so he figured he’d try lightening the mood first. “I need to tell you something. It’s what Adam and I were talking about. The Mill…Lachlan set it on fire. He tried using it as a distraction to make it easier for him to sneak in here, to get to you.” It’s instant that he sees the hurt flush over Robert’s face. He knows what it meant to him. He knows how hard Robert had worked on it while he was locked up. “How bad is it? Is it all gone?” Robert asks fighting back tears as Aaron reaches out caressing the side of his face, using his thumb to wipe away the single stray tear that broke free. He gingerly smiles. “Not too bad actually, thanks to Gerry. The majority of the fire was contained to the spare flat, so not much damage to ours and it looks like there wasn’t any structural damage so repairing shouldn’t be an issue.” Robert lets go of a sigh in relief. “So, we do have a bit of luck then.” He jokes. “And what do you mean thanks to Gerry?”

Still trying to keep the mood light Aaron continues. “Apparently Gerry our own little guardian angel that one. He was there, he was with Lachlan when he tried to kill you in the car. Gerry tried to stop him, he managed to swerve the car enough that it didn’t…and he called the ambulance that got you. Then he’d also found Lachlan setting the fire to the spare flat and fought him off before he could set fire to ours.” Robert finds himself dumbfounded, not sure what to make of it all. “Remind me to buy him a pint.” He finally lets out. “You idiot, I think we owe him more than a pint.” Aaron replies as Robert rolls his eyes back at him. “You know what I meant.” He replies smiling back at his husband. “I love you so much, you know that, right?” Aaron says. “Yeah, I know, and I love you more.” Robert responds. “So…you ready for your adoring crowd to come see ya? They’ve all been waiting for quite a while.” Robert smiles at Aaron’s words, it warms his heart to think of where he is now, to know that he has so many people that care about him. To know that he has a family. “Can you just stay here with me for a bit longer?” He asks looking back lovingly into Aaron’s eyes. Looking at him the only way he can, looking at him as if he had hung the moon, as if he was the center of absolutely everything. Aaron simply melts into the look and nods. “Yeah, sure. I think they can wait another 10 minutes” He says taking Robert’s hand into his, placing a soft kiss on Robert’s lips, and taking a seat next him.

 

________

 

_EARLY APRIL_

He’s not really sure what woke him, if it was his alarm, or just habit now, but Robert groggily opened his eyes and realized it wasn’t any of those reasons. The wet tongue lapping at his face gives it away, the culprit behind his slumber being disturbed was the growing puppy that’s now close to 3 sizes larger than he was just a month ago. A small whine comes from Loki as he licks across Robert’s face yet again, must be time for his early morning walk. He gingerly lifts the duvet off him as he tries to quietly sneak out of bed, doing his best not to wake his husband. He doesn’t want to feel like a burden, it’s been his biggest fear since the “accident”.

“And where do you think you’re going?” Aaron hoarsely lets out. “Just taking him out, he needs to go.” Robert informs him. “Like hell you are, just let me get dressed and I’ll take him. You just lay back down, yeah?” Aaron says, and Robert’s had enough. This is what he was trying to avoid, he knows it comes from a good place, but he’s tired of being treated like he’s made of glass or at least that’s what he tells himself. It’s what he’s told himself since the doctors informed him about the damage and his recovery, when they told him there was a possibility that there could be lasting effects. Deep down he knew it wasn’t about everyone treating him like he was fragile, deep down he knew more than anything that he feared being a burden, he feared dragging Aaron down. He remembers the stories about Jackson. He remembers the bits he’d heard from others, the bits that Aaron had actually told him about and it terrified him to put Aaron through anything like that.

“Can you please just stop treating me like this?” Robert snapped, came out much harsher than he intended, but he couldn’t help it, it’s been nagging at him for a while now. Aaron is taken aback, he looks confused. “Like what? Did…did I do something wrong?” He asks in return. “No…it’s not…you know what, just forget it.” Robert lets out, taking a deep breath, he doesn’t want to lie to Aaron, but he’s not quite sure this is a can of worms he’s ready to open just yet. He drops his eyes and tries to look away, Aaron knows him too well and is quick to read him, he knows there’s something bugging him. “Robert…we promised each other, no more lies, no more hiding things. What’s this about? What’s going on?” Aaron lets out as he sits up. Robert wipes his hands across his face and sighs loudly. “Fuck. I just…I don’t want to be a burden.” He lets out, chin trembling. “You what?” Aaron asks scrunching his brows, dumbfounded. “I feel like I’m dragging you down.” Robert says before Aaron lets out a small laugh, before he takes his pillow and playfully throws it at Robert’s face. “What you on about?” Aaron asks. “I don’t want you to feel like it’s your responsibility to take care of me. I know what you went through with him…” Robert is saying and is quickly cut off by Aaron. “Don’t you dare.” He lets out and Robert tries to continue. “I know how hard that was for you.” Aaron cuts him off again. “Don’t you dare compare yourself to him…look, I loved him. He was my first love and all, but this…” Aaron says gesturing between them. “You and me, nothing can compare to this, Robert. You are everything to me and nothing has ever come close, nothing will ever come close, and I’m not taking care of you because I feel like it’s my responsibility. I’m taking care of you because I want to…because I love you, you muppet.” He says reaching over and running his hand down Robert’s cheek. “Now, will you please stop being so dramatic and lay back down? The last thing I need right now is for you to fall down the stairs and hurt yourself…again. Just because they put your arm into the smaller cast doesn’t mean you can start doing summersaults.” Aaron jokes. “I’ll take him; besides, you’ll probably just wake mum up and you know how she gets when you wake her.”

After moving into the Mill, they never thought they’d find himself living in the pub again, yet here they were, it’s been nearly a month since they moved back into the pub with Chas while they did some remodeling at the Mill. After the fire they decided to go ahead and expand their flat, the original plan was to rent out the spare one to make some money as every penny they had went into buying the building and then renovating it, but now that money was of no concern there was no need for it. Robert wanted a larger kitchen, fitting everyone in there when they had family get-togethers was always tricky and he hated feeling so squeezed in. Aaron wanted the spiral staircase gone, had nagged about it since he first laid eyes on it, besides Robert’s injuries proved how inadequate they were. If any one of them ever had similar injuries again, it would be impossible to get up to the bedrooms. Both wanted a home large enough for their family to grow when the time was right, Chas had recently started dropping hints about how exciting it would be for them to give her a grandson. “I’d hate to be one of them really old, gray-haired nanas.” She’d say wiggling her brows, nudging her elbow at Aaron or Robert, whenever the opportunity arose.

Robert had nearly dozed back to sleep when he felt Aaron walk back into their room, Aaron’s old room, he’d put Loki in his crate and quietly slithered back into bed before he started gently kissing at his neck. Every soft kiss sending shivers through his entire body, Robert reveled in the feeling because he could never get enough of it. He could never get enough of Aaron. He’s letting out a soft hum as he exposes his neck further to welcome more of his kisses when he feels Aaron’s hand slipping into his boxers and slowly taking a hold of him, he squeezes gently making Robert gasp in response. “Someone’s feeling a bit frisky.” Robert lets out with that smug look on his face before he feels Aarons finger pressing to his lips. Aaron shushes him before throwing the duvet off them. He slowly starts kissing down his neck to his collar bone, to his chest, to the bullet wound, to his stomach, and all the way down to the base of his cock. He brings his free hand up to his mouth and spits onto his fingers before he brings them down to the tender skin of Robert’s hole, using the spit to slick it up. Robert’s not sure where this came from, but he certainly isn’t going to complain, he throws his head back and arches his back off the bed when he feels the warmth of Aaron mouth on him taking him whole, and then he’s feeling fingers entering him. “Fuck.” Slips out of his mouth before he even realizes, he hopes it wasn’t loud enough to be heard, hopes it wasn’t loud enough to wake Chas up.

Aaron knows what he’s doing, he’s been dying to do this for weeks, but he’s been too scared of hurting Robert, he’s done waiting. Besides a little bit of fun couldn’t possibly hurt. He’s taking his time, enjoying all the muffled moans coming out of Robert, every one turning him on more than the last. He slowly pulls back from Robert’s cock and licks at the slit of the head lapping up the pre-cum that’s now dripping out. He runs his tongue down lengthy of his shaft past his sack and licks at his taint before licking back up to the head. “I’ve missed this so much, you don’t even know.” He mumbles out between licks he takes at the head before engulfing his entire length in one go. Robert moans through clenched teeth, trying not to be too loud and he runs his fingers through Aaron’s hair. “If you think you can, I want you to fuck my face.” Aaron tells him through glassy eyes, caught up in ecstasy. “You what?” Robert asks, knowing damn well what it was that Aaron asked. He just wants to hear him say it. If he wasn’t hard already, hearing him say such things, would make him hard in the blink of an eye. “Fuck my face, Robert.” Robert grins and does as he’s told. He starts out with slower thrusts and he pushes himself off the bed and further into Aaron’s eager mouth and begins to pick up pace to match Aaron’s fingers entering and exiting his hole. He feels the rush of heat coming over him, his face flushed pink, and a slight burn in his cheeks. He can feel the buildup in his stomach and Aaron can read him. He can read him like a book, even when it comes to sex, he knows what every move that Robert makes means. He knows what every sound means. Even the look in his eyes. He knows Robert is getting close and begins to curve his fingers as he begins to massage his prostate. The new stimulation practically makes Robert shoot off the bed, his moaning deepens, and his thrusts get harder. Every thrust sending this cock to the back of Aaron’s throat, every thrust bringing him closer to the edge. It’s not long before he starts seeing stars and his toes curl. “Aaron, I’m going to come.” He warns. “Fuck, I’m coming. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” He quietly cries out as stream after stream shoots down Aaron’s throat, as Aaron swallows every last drop. When Robert settles back down Aaron comes back up and kisses at Robert’s lips, parting them with his tongue, taking control immediately. Robert hums into the kiss tasting himself on Aaron’s tongue, he reaches down and grabs himself squeezing. He just came, and he feels like he can go again already. “You like that?” Aaron asks with a cocky grin on his face. “That was fucking amazing, but maybe you can fuck my face now?” He returns.

 

________

 

_APRIL 22 nd_

“Come on, Rob. We can’t spend all day in, again. Specially not today!” Aaron tries to coerce Robert out of bed. It’s almost become a daily thing. Robert just wanting to stay in all day every day. Part of him hates the fact that he’s being so dramatic as usual, but he can’t fully complain. All of this rest has done him well, his bones are healing well and quicker than expected, probably do to all the bed rest, the less strain on them the better. Tonight is a different story though. Tonight, is Robert birthday, there is no way they can just stay in and do nothing. “Doesn’t matter. I can’t even dress properly with these fucking monstrosities on me.” He says gesturing to his casts. “You are so vain, you know that? No one cares, no one’s going to be looking at your casts. Everyone just wants to be with you to celebrate your birthday.”  Aaron argues. He shakes his head wondering how he fell in love with him. “You know, sometimes I forget why I fell in love with ya.” Robert feigns shock, “Because you just couldn’t resist me.” He says before yanking Aaron on top of him. Aaron simply smiles at him as they lay chest to chest pressed against each other, he leans down and places a chaste kiss to Robert’s lips before touching foreheads with him. “Come on, for me.” He pleads, his eyes doing most of the talking. The eyes that can melt Robert into complete mush. “Fine, but I’m only doing this for you.” Aaron claps his hands together in victory as he stands back up.

He needed this win. He already felt like crap since his big plans went out the window. He’d gone through so much trouble to arrange something major for Robert’s birthday, after all Robert pretty much made all of his dreams come true for his birthday. Aaron would still often talk about his birthday in Vegas. With Robert in casts and Aaron constantly worried about him healing properly, there was no way he was going to risk it. The big surprise would have to hold off until after the casts came off, once Robert would have no problem walking or climbing. For now, he’d have to settle for the smaller surprises and a simpler party. He’d rented out Robert’s favorite restaurant in town for the night, between the Sugdens and the Dingles, no way would they be able to share with a general crowd.

Robert took his time getting ready, went through a few outfits before he was happy enough with the outcome, he mostly whined about how ridiculous he looked because of the cast on his leg. The smaller one on his forearm wasn’t as a big a deal so he counted that as one small victory. Aaron sat back and laughed at him. “You are being ridiculous, Robert. You looked amazing in the last three outfits…you look amazing in anything you wear.” He says winking at him. “Seriously though, we need to get going. It’s your party and we’re already running late.” Robert grumbles in response. “You really think this looks okay?” He asks. “Of course, I do.” Aaron responds, grabbing a hold of Robert’s tie and pulling him in as close as possible, the sling holding his broken arm in place the only space between them. “I think you look sexy.” He whispers in that raspy voice that sends chills throughout Robert’s core, before placing his lips on Robert’s.

The kiss had been hot and intense, it started out slow and quickly escalated. They showed up to the party an hour late, Aaron blaming it all on Robert going through several outfits before deciding on one, something no one questioned. “Sounds about right.” Victoria joked. “In any case, I’m so glad you’re finally here. Happy birthday, Rob.” Victoria says as she jumps into his arms for a hug making him wince as she presses a bit too much into his sling. “Vic, be careful yeah? Don’t need you hurting him more. He’s already milking it for all it’s worth.” He jokes before Robert gently elbows his side. “Oi, you’re the one that won’t let me do anything.” Robert protests. “It’s for your own good luv.” Chas jumps in, “You know Aaron, you’re better off just doing as he says or he’ll nag your ear off.” She jokes with Robert, both laughing at Aaron’s expense. “Ugh…this.” Aaron says gesturing between Robert and Chas. “I don’t like this, you two, teaming up. It’s not right. It’s unnatural really.” He says laughing as they head for their seats.

The night is festive and full of laughs, the Dingles per usual becoming the life of the party after a few drinks as Chas and Charity turn on the karaoke machine and start belting away. Cain and Liv booing and throwing napkins at them. Robert sits in place looking around with a massive grin on his face, glad that Aaron made him agree to this. He looks over at his husband who’s deep in conversation with Belle, but quickly looks over and gives him a wink before returning his attention to Belle. Everything felt right, felt as it should be, but things don’t always stay that way, not for him. Bernice takes a seat next to Robert and leans in for a hug. “Happy birthday, Robert.” She begins. “How’s the healing going?” She asks. “It’s going very well. The breaks seem to be healing quicker than they thought they would. My arm should be out of the cast in about a week or so, my leg still has a couple more.” He informs her. “That’s great, well you know, I’ve been certified as a physical therapist, so you just stop by the salon and I’ll have you in tip-top shape in no time.” She says, Robert tries his best not to break out into laughter. _So, a physical therapist now?_ He jokes to himself before it all comes crashing back down. “So, any word on Lachlan? Do you know when the trial is set to start?” He’s suddenly sent back reeling to the accident, to the hospital, to that day when he nearly saw Lachlan take Aaron away from him. “Bernice!” Victoria nearly barks at her. “It’s his birthday for crying out loud.” She takes Bernice by the arm and hauls her away. “I’m so sorry, Rob.” She says looking over her shoulder.

“You alright?” Aaron is by his side before he even realizes, snapping him out of his thoughts. “Yeah.” Robert lets out. “It’s just…” and he can’t even finish. “S’okay, you don’t have to explain, I heard. Don’t worry about it, tonight’s your night, don’t let that ruin it.” Aaron encourages him. Robert nods and Aaron smiles in return. “Okay, then we can get to your presents.” He says as he stands grabbing on to a champagne glass and tapping a fork to it, grabbing everyone’s attention. “Looks like it’s time for the birthday boy to open his presents.” Aaron announces to the cheers in the room. Present after present Robert smiles and thanks everyone for their gifts saving Liv’s and Aaron’s for last. Liv runs up and hugs him gently. “You’re going to love this.” She says handing him a beautifully wrapped box, he takes it and starts tearing at the paper before opening the box to reveal a navy colored shirt with a paisley styled pattern. Definitely his style. “I love it, Liv.” He tells her, and she smiles in return. “That’s great because there’s a second part to this gift.” She says as she hands him a second box, much smaller in size. He opens it to find a bandana in the exact same color and exact same pattern. “It’s for Loki. Figured you two should match.” She tells him with the biggest grin he’s ever seen on her which he returns in the same. “Liv, that’s cracking! I love it!” He looks over at Aaron and smirks. “This is going to be pretty hard to top.” He tells him earning a devilish smirk from him

Aron’s a nervous wreck as he steps up to Robert with two envelops in hand. He hands him the first with a bit of a warning. “Now, this isn’t really a present, at least not just yet.” Robert opens it and reads through the paper and a look of confusion spreads across his face. “This is a check from our insurance company. I don’t get it.” Aaron chuckles a bit. “It’s for your car…meaning starting tomorrow we can go out and start looking for a new one. I know how much you loved that car, so you can get whatever you like. If it’s more than the check I’ll cover it.” He tells him, and Robert nearly shoots off his chair and hugs him. “You are the best!” Aaron squeezes back and hands him the second envelope. Robert opens it and begins reading it, his expression goes from the happy and ecstatic one he had seconds ago to a more emotional one. His eyes begin to water, and he looks Aaron in the eyes, everyone else suddenly fading away. “Aaron, you didn’t have to do this.” He says fighting back tears. “I know I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. It’s yours innit?” He replies as Robert pulls him into another hug, he gently kisses his forehead. “What is it?” Liv asks. Robert turns and looks at everyone else around the room. “Sorry Dingles, but you just lost one to the Sugden clan.” Robert says beaming with pride. “What you on about?” Charity asks, Robert grins back holding Aaron’s hand, fingers laced. “I’d like to formally introduce you all to me husband Aaron Sugden.”

 

________

 

After the party ended they headed back home, back to the pub that is. Robert sat on the edge of the bed looking at Aaron as he undressed. Looking on in amazement. The man before him, the man of his dreams, his husband, had now taken his name and he couldn’t be prouder. “Why are you looking at me that way?” Aaron asked. “No reason. I’m just happy. You make me happy.” He tells him, making him grin. “Well, the night ain’t over yet birthday boy. How about I make you a bit happier.” He says walking towards Robert wearing nothing but his boxers. He stops in front of him and places his hands to either side of Robert’s face and leans down kissing his lips, licking at his lower plump lip. Robert nearly gasps at the feeling, he opens his eyes and looks directly into the ocean blue ones that are looking back at him. “You think, your leg can hold my weight?” Aaron asks with a glint in his eyes. “Yeah.” Robert quickly replies. “Good.”

Aaron slowly starts unbuttoning Robert’s shirt and easily slides it off his left side, taking care to remove the sling and carefully sliding it off his right side and over his cast. His trousers are a bit more trouble but soon enough they are in a pile on the floor and are followed by Aaron’s boxers. Robert traces his fingers down Aaron’s chest to his stomach carefully watching as his skin reacts to his touch and Aaron uses his fingers to lift Robert’s chin up, so they are looking into each other’s eyes again before he leans down for another kiss. As their lips part Aaron gently straddles Robert’s lap, slowly lowering his full weight onto him to ensure he doesn’t hurt him. Robert looks him in the eyes and grins that smug grin of his as he reaches around taking a hold of Aaron’s arse, squeezing at his cheeks. His right arm might be in a cast, but that is not going to stop him, not at this moment. With his left hand he lightly slaps at his arse earning a guttural groan from Aaron. “I’m not hurting you, am I?” Aaron asks one last time and Robert shakes his head chuckling. “I just slapped your arse and you’re asking if you’re hurting _me_.” Robert starts. “But no, you’re not hurting my leg.” He tells Aaron. “Good.” Aaron returns before placing a hand to his mouth and spitting into it. He reaches his arm back behind him and Robert gasps as Aaron closes his fist around his cock, using the spit in place of lube. He lines himself up and slowly starts to lower himself onto Robert’s length and Robert lets out a guttural sound Aaron’s never heard from him before. Both Robert and Aaron are enthralled in the moment, so wrapped up in the pleasure their giving each other, that they don’t notice the single knock on the door before it creaks open. “Hey luv, you two…OH MY GOD!” Chas yells out as she quickly turns and makes a run for it.

Robert breaks out into laughter, tightly holding onto Aaron whose skin is 5 shades redder than anything Robert has ever seen. He’s mortified. “We can’t do this, we need to get out of here.” Aaron lets out. “I don’t think I can ever look me mum in the face again.” Robert breaks further into laughter. “Well, I’m sure she’ll probably never be able to look at you in the face again either.” He says laughing into Aaron’s shoulder. “We need to get back into the Mill, this isn’t working any better than before we moved out. There’s no privacy here.” Aaron says before he reluctantly breaks out into laughter as well. Robert stops laughing, tries to be serious for a moment. “So…we gonna finish this?”

 

 

 

 


	20. I Love It When You call Me That

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robert and Aaron try to move on after everything that's happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally here...  
> Have to say it's a bittersweet feeling. Considering I wrote this all on a whim, it's such a bummer that it's come to it's end. Hope you guys enjoyed it as much as I liked writing it.
> 
> Finally got around to doing edits...so edits done :)

 

 

“So then, Mr. Sugden, how’s the blissful retired life treating you these days?” Adam asks Aaron as they walk side by side, Loki leading the way, sniffing every inch of the ground along the way, chasing leaves as the wind blows them by. “It’s going pretty well, actually.” Aaron says with a smug look on his face, something he’s slowly picked up from Robert. “Honestly though, right now we’re pretty busy getting everything finished up at the Mill.” He says. “That’s great, man, and how’s that going?” Adam asks patting Aaron on the back. “Everything should be finished in a couple of days, if Robert could stop changing his mind. Either way, it can’t come quick enough, I’m so ready to get out of mum’s.” Adam’s face contorts as he tries to hold in the laughter that’s dying to break out…it doesn’t hold for long and he’s suddenly holding his sides laughing. “He told you, didn’t he?” Aaron asks, referring to Robert. “Sorry, mate. He made me promise not to tell you he told me. I can’t believe Chas walked in on you two doing the deed.” He laughs out before Aaron takes a swing at his shoulder. “Ow.” Adam’s rubbing at his shoulder when Aaron suddenly hands him the leash and jumps into the shrubs besides them leaving Adam at a loss for words, he’s stood there for a minute trying to figure out what happened when he hears her voice. “Hiya.” Chas starts. “Aaron isn’t around, is he?” She asks carefully looking around, clearly trying to avoid him. “Nah, he asked me to walk this little guy for him, I think he’s up at the Mill with the contractors. Why? You trying to avoid him?” He asks before chuckling. Chas nearly glares at him for a minute. “Robert told you, didn’t he?” She asks shaking her head before walking off. “See ya around Chas!” Adam shouts, giving Aaron the clear.

It’s been just over a week since Chas had walked in on them having sex and both Aaron and she have been doing everything in their power to avoid one another. Robert’s done the same, but he’s not going out of his way like Aaron to do so, he tells Aaron there’s no need to be embarrassed about it. “Yeah, I’d love to see how you’d react if it has been Diane or Vic.” Aaron argues. “Listen, man. You are going to have to see her eventually. You know that right? She is your mum after all.” Adam says extending his hand out to Aaron, he helps him out of the shrubs and pats at his shoulder. “Besides, it’s not like she didn’t already know you two go at it constantly. She once told me she overheard you two in the shower back when you were living there. She was going round trying to find ya somewhere else to stay, you two were doing her head in.” He says so casually. “Gah! Please don’t tell me that!” Aaron scoffs taking the leash back. “Look, I know I’ll have to see her eventually, doesn’t mean I can’t avoid her until it’s absolutely necessary.” He says as they continue their walk, Adam changes subject to Aaron’s relief. “So, how’s Rob doing?” He asks and quickly sees Aaron’s expression turn. No matter how sour his mood may be, the mention of Robert always puts a smile on his face. “He’s doing great. His arm’s healed way faster than expected so they just took the cast off. His leg still needs a few more weeks though…he’s not so happy about that. Threw a big fuss about it. Practically called his doctor an idiot, told him he wasn’t doing his job right.” He says laughing. “Yeah, that sounds like Robert alright.”

Aaron had told Robert he was going out for a walk with Adam, they haven’t seen much of each other lately now that Aaron’s no longer working at the scrapyard, so Robert decided to spend some time with Victoria, despite his mood. Maybe she could cheer him up a bit, or so he hoped. He’d asked her if she wanted to meet up for breakfast at the café, much to her delight. With hardly a cloud in the sky, the sunshine was bright and warm, Victoria practically dragging Robert out the café to sit and enjoy it. Robert sat with an Americano in hand blankly staring at nothing, with a single thought on his mind. A single thought eating away at him. “What’s with the face?” Victoria asks snapping her fingers in front of Robert’s face. “Huh?” Robert question, snapping out of his thoughts. “What’s with the face?” Victoria repeated. “Rob, what’s wrong? Is it the trial?” She asks, noticing the way he nearly shudders at the mention. It’s been over a month since the incident, since Lachlan fully lost it. Robert still doesn’t want to talk about it, nearly shuts down whenever it comes up. Everyone’s tried their best to not bring it up, but the trial is nearly here. In just a few days’ time he will have to be there, he will have to stand as a witness. He will have to recall those moments in his life he’d rather not. “I don’t want to talk about it.” He replies. “Can we talk about something else?” He says before taking a sip of his Americano. Victoria eyes him for a moment, reluctantly changing the subject. “So, how’s the work going on at the Mill?” She asks.

“Almost done actually, but I’m having second thoughts on the island for the kitchen, and Aaron didn’t seem as thrilled with the dining room set, if we make any changes there, it might set us back a week or so.” Robert informs her. There’s few people that know how to read him, Aaron being at the top of the short list, can read him like a book. Victoria is also pretty good at reading him, about as good as Liv. She stares into his eyes for a moment, as if something was written on them before she pulls back and takes a sip of her coffee. “So.” She starts. “Does he know?” Victoria asks before going back to her coffee again. Robert slightly shakes his head in confusion.

“Does who know what?”

“Aaron…Does he know?”

“What you on about?” Robert still playing it cool, trying act confused.

“You dragging your feet.”

“What do you mean dragging my feet?”

“Oh, come off it, Rob. I’m not stupid. I know what you’re doing, I’m just actually surprised that I’m the only one that’s noticed.”

“Noticed what?”

“That you’re dragging your feet with the Mill because of the trial.” Victoria says, so matter of fact. She does love doing her psycho analysis. “Why? If you need to keep your mind busy with something else, I’m here for ya. We’re all here for ya. There’s no need to keep Aaron, Liv, and yourself from your home because of it.”

She can see the frustration in his eyes, in his face. He’s always been so closed off, but Aaron changed that. She doesn’t want to see him go back to that. She reaches out and places her hand on top of his, gently squeezes and smiles at him. “Rob, I love ya. You’re my brother and I’m here for you. You can talk to me.” Victoria encourages him, hoping she can get through. His shoulders drop, and he sighs deeply. “It’s not that I’m trying to keep my mind busy. Like you said, it’s not like I’m doing all the work. It’s just that…” He sighs again and rubs his free hand across his face. “I just don’t want it to be tainted again.” He says, confusing her. She tries to think of what that could mean, but has no clue. “What do you mean?” She asks. “It’s our home, Vic. It’s where I see myself spending the rest of my life with him. Where I see us having a family, and I don’t just mean Liv. It’s where I see us growing old together, and I don’t want it to be tainted by this. The last time…it had been tainted by what I thought I’d done, what Bex made me think I did. I don’t want our home to be tainted by Lachlan, by that trial, by whatever happens there. I just want all of this to be behind us before we move back in, a clean start.” Victoria squeezes at his hand again and looks him with sympathetic eyes. “I know I should tell him.” Robert says, referring to Aaron. “I want to tell him. I just, I just don’t want him to be mad at me.” Victoria lets out a small chuckle. “Well, he will be, but not because of why you’re doing it. He’ll be mad if you hide it from him. So, tell, him. Tell Aaron.” She’s saying when Robert feels arms wrap around him from behind…when he feels a kiss to the top of his head. “Tell me what?” Aaron asks. “Right, I’ll leave you to it.” Victoria says as she gets up and gently squeezes Robert’s hand one last time in reassurance.

“That looked a bit serious…what did you do this time?” Aaron asks, mostly joking and Robert follows with his fake offended look. “Why do you think I did something?” He asks. “Because, let’s face it, you always do something…you’re just lucky I love you anyway.” He winks an eye at Robert making him smile, genuinely smile for the first time today. Robert pauses for a moment knowing he needs to tell Aaron what’s bugging him and what’s had the construction at the Mill slowing down. He clears his throat and then begins. “I need to tell you something.” He starts, as Aaron takes the chair where Victoria had been sitting. “I think we should hold off on moving back into the Mill for a bit.” Robert says as Aaron nearly winces at the suggestion. “What do you mean? We need to get out of the pub, Robert. I can’t keep doing this.” Aaron nearly snaps out. He’s had it with the Pub, he’s had it with how overrun it is with people either living or crashing there. Mainly, he’s tired of doing everything he can to avoid Chas. “But…” Robert tries and is quickly cut-off. “No. No buts. I actually jumped into some shrubs to avoid running into me mum today. Adam’s not going to let it go either. I’m tired of it. I’m sick of trying to avoid her, that is, not Adam.” Robert can tell Aaron’s getting aggravated, he usually rambles when he does.

“I don’t want our home being tainted by another White!” Robert blurts out and before he knows it, it’s all coming. Everything he’d told Victoria just moments ago is now freely flowing from him, his eyes glossed over with unshed tears. “I just want to put all of this behind us before we move back in. I want us to have a clean start.” Aaron looks back at him with loving eyes and takes his hand. “Okay.” He says. “Okay?” Robert replies. “Yeah, okay. I get it. It hadn’t crossed my mind, but I get it.” Aaron says as a smile begins to spread across his face. “So, you want us to have a family…you mean kids?” He asks, his voice a bit shaky, hoping it doesn’t sound like he’s scared of the thought. He’s not, he’s actually been thinking about it for a while. He’s always loved kids, and Robert’s made him want everything he never thought he’d want. Love, marriage, kids, everything. “Well, yeah.” He replies. “Wasn’t sure if I’d ever want them, especially after…you know…but I do. With you, when the time is right. It’s okay if you don’t though, you are everything to me, so long as I have you, it’s all I’ll need.” And now he’s rambling. Aaron stands from his seat and grabs Robert from the back of his head and gently pulls him forward, placing a kiss to his forehead. “You’re such a muppet.” He mumbles on Robert’s forehead before pulling back and looking into his eyes. “Of course, I want to have kids with ya, I want everything with ya.” He tells him as a beaming smile spreads across Robert’s face. “Maybe after the trial, we can start talking about it then?” He asks, Aaron nods in return. “Yeah.”

 

________

 

Robert stood in place remembering everything that had happened, remembering things he wants to forget, things he wished never happened. His hands feel clammy, and he feels like he’s got a cold sweat, he just wants it all to be over. “Mr. Sugden, will you please answer the question.” The judge asked. Robert had gotten lost in the memories that he zoned out, had forgotten he was on stand as witness in the court room. He clears his throat. “Yeah, sorry.” He apologizes and begins to explain what he remembers happening. First with the crash, though there wasn’t much he could elaborate on it as he never saw it coming. He follows with the events at the hospital. Lachlan sneaking in with a gun in hand, threatening him then turning the threat to Aaron. He recollects the fight. Aaron disarming Lachlan, Aaron getting distracted and Lachlan getting the upper hand. Him trying to get up, trying to get to Aaron, Lachlan turning the threat back to both of them, and finally Liv saving the day. He knows all the words to leaving his mouth, but he feels like he’s elsewhere. He hates that he’s doing this, wish he wasn’t, feels responsible for all of it, feels even worse when he looks up and sees Chrissie in tears, Rebecca trying to console her. He doesn’t even realize when he words his feelings. “This is all my fault. I did this.” He says as he looks over to Aaron and sees him wiping his hands down his face. “I broke their family apart. I drove him to this.”

Aaron followed not long after Robert. He’d sat there a nervous wreck and Robert tried to take blame for everything that happened. Sat there a nervous wreck as they questioned him about it. Felt more relief than anything when he was called up, so long as Robert wasn’t up there taking blame, he could handle his questioning. Like Robert before, Aaron stood up there and recalled the events of the night, first with the fire that nearly claimed their home followed by the hospital. Just like Robert, these were memories he’d rather forget. He hated to do it, hated to put Chrissie through further, but he had to defend Robert, had to help put his mind at ease. “What happened is nobody’s fault but his. Lachlan is just sick, he’s not right. Everyone knows it. Everyone knew it. This wouldn’t be the first twisted thing he’s done,” He says staring defiantly at Lachlan who sits with a look on his face, devoid of any emotion. If he wasn’t crazy before, he sure is now. Aaron is asked to elaborate on what he meant, and he hates himself for doing it when he looks over to Chrissie and sees the tears streaming down her face, but he had to do it. Had to make sure there was no question that Lachlan wasn’t right, that Robert isn’t to blame in any way. He recalls what he did to Alicia, what he’d done well before Chrissie kicked Robert out.

Even when Chrissie was called up, when she finally broke down and turned on him there was no emotion in his eyes. It was clear that Lachlan had completely lost. It wasn’t long before Gerry was up there recollecting that night, he had after all been witness to most of it. He’d said his piece on the crash and how he tried to stop Lachlan, about calling for an ambulance after having fought Lachlan for the first time that night. He recalled finding Lachlan setting fire to the Mill and fighting him off for a second time before he could set fire to Robert and Aaron’s flat. He had been questioned about his shaky friendship with Lachlan and how they met, he was questioned on his opinion of Lachlan’s mental state. Between the testimonies and video evidence that had been collected the judge had called that it was time to deliberate. The jury had been sent out to make their decision on Lachlan’s fate.

“It’s not your fault, Robert. You need to stop blaming yourself for it. He’s not right, even Chrissie knows it. You have to stop beating yourself up about it.” Aaron comforts him. Robert and Aaron both stand surrounded by their family near the entrance to the courthouse while they await the jury to deliberate. “Seriously, Rob. Please stop blaming yourself.” Aaron says as he holds Robert’s face between his hands. “None of this is your fault.” He says again, before he gently kisses his lips. Finally, Robert reluctantly nods his head. Robert takes his hand lacing their fingers together, something that has become second nature to him, before he walks over to Chrissie and Rebecca with Aaron behind him. “I’m so sorry about this, Chrissie.” He tells her. He’s caught off guard when she leans in for a hug, as she sobs into his shoulder. “Nothing for you to be sorry about, Robert.” Rebecca says. “None of this is your fault, if anything, it’s ours. We should have seen it, we should have known he wasn’t doing well. This whole time he had been faking it, acting like everything was fine, like he’d moved on like the rest of us. We should have gotten him help.” She’s trying to explain when Robert cuts her off. “No, Bex. It’s no one’s fault. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. He locked himself away. Wouldn’t let anyone in, trust me I know what that’s like. Sometimes people are just broken and there’s nothing that anyone can do for them. You hear that Chrissie?” He asks as he gently squeezes her. “There’s nothing you did wrong. Nothing you could have done. Unless he wants it, unless he asks for it, there nothing you can do to help. So, don’t blame yourself.”

It had only been just over an hour when everyone was summoned back into the courtroom, the jury having come to a decision quickly as there had been too much evidence and nothing but confessions from Lachlan, it seemed there was no argument to make. Just as quickly as they had all been summoned back, Lachlan had been found guilty and sentenced, much to everyone’s surprise. The judge more than happy to make an example of him. Between 3 attempted murders, 1 count of arson, and 1 count of reckless endangerment, Lachlan would be spending the rest of his life behind bars, with no early release of any kind on the table. Chrissie broke in tears shouting for Lachlan, apologizing for having failed him as a mother, as Robert held her.

 

________

 

“I swear to god Robert, if you don’t put it in I’m going to kill you.” Aaron nearly hissed through gritted teeth, the anticipation killing him. “I can’t put it in, Chas is just around the corner. I don’t want her to see.” Robert returns in the same fashion. “Robert, please just stick it in.” Aaron tries again, hoping that for once Robert will just do as he’s told and not try to argue about it. “Stick what in and where?” Chas asks as she walks back into living room from the Pub. It’s been nearly 2 weeks since the trial and both Aaron and Robert are ready to move back into their home. All construction done, the Mill now sports a larger kitchen that opens to a massive family room, a formal dining room big enough to fit both the Dingles and Sugdens, 2 master bedrooms since Liv insisted on having her own on-suite, 2 guest rooms, and an office. The Mill was certainly ready for when they decide to grow their family. They were properly packed and ready to move back, best of all Robert had just had his cast removed so he was in an even better mood. “Well…” Robert starts, silently wording a sorry to Aaron. “Aaron wanted this to be a surprise, wanted you to just find it later, but would rather give it to you in person…you know like a normal person. You know, on the count of you two trying to avoid each other until we’re all dead, apparently.” Robert says handing over an envelope to Chas. “What’s this?” She asks before Aaron jumps in. “It’s…it’s uh…it’s Charity’s share of the pub. We bought her out for you, as a thanks. You know, for putting up with us while we got the Mill back in shape. We know you’ve had some problems with her, well because she is Charity after all and we wanted to give something back to you. Also…sorry bout, you know what? Maybe don’t just barge into someone’s room without knocking, will ya?” He finally lets out with a bit of a smile. “Aw…my babies.” Chas says as she wraps her arms around them, pulling them into a group hug. “Let’s just all pretend that never happened. A mother, should never see her boys doing that, and I’ll probably have nightmares for the rest of my life,” She jokes getting a laugh at least out of Robert. “You know you didn’t have to do this right? I loved having you three back here, brings back some good memories, but enough about that. Are you guys all set up for the house warming tonight?” She asks.

Neither of them had been too keen with the idea of a housewarming party, both just wanting to enjoy the night themselves, moving back in, but Chas and Liv were having none of it. In the end both were happy to have agreed, putting everything that had happened behind them and focusing on a new beginning, they enjoyed partying with the Dingle and Sugden clans on hand. Besides what’s not to like, free drinks provided by Chas and free gifts from everyone else. The night ending with plenty of cheers and hugs as one by one all the guests made their way home. After a quick clean up around the kitchen Robert grabs a hold of Aaron by his waist and pulls him in. “Well, Mr. Sugden. How about we go upstairs and christen the new bedroom?” He says softly hovering his lips over Aaron’s. “Say it again.” Aaron replies. “Which part?” Robert asks. “The part where you called me Mr. Sugden…I love it when you call me that.” Aaron says biting his lower lip. “That is your name, isn’t it? Mr. Sugden.” Robert returns before taking Aaron’s lips, partying them with his tongue and pulling him in closer. The kiss is forceful yet loving, leaves Aaron nearly breathless, nearly dizzy. Aaron licks his lips, staring at Robert’s and he pulls back, taking a hold of Robert’s hand and quickly leading them upstairs. Up the regular stairs. _YES! No more fucking spiral staircase!_ Is all Aaron can think.

The moment their in their room with the door closed and locked behind them, a new habit Aaron has picked up. It’s only seconds before all of their clothes are piled on the floor and only a few more before Aaron is on his back on the bed, Robert on top of him kissing and licking at his neck. Aaron throws his head back in pleasure as his back arches off the bed, Robert loving every sound coming out of him. He begins kissing down his neck all the way down to Aaron’s cock, he takes him in his hand, he’s already hard but he can feel him getting harder by the second. He pumps his hand up and down a few times before taking him into his mouth all at once, hungry for it. It’s been a while since they’ve really enjoyed each other. Aaron’s been on edge since Chas walked in on them, there’s no excuses now. Aaron lets out a guttural sound the moment he feels the warmth of Robert’s mouth, his back arches and his fists bunch into the bedsheets as Robert pulls back and licks up and down the shaft. He goes back to the head and licks at the slit. “I love the way you taste, Aaron.” He says before taking him back into his mouth. “Fuck.” Is all Aaron can say and he runs his fingers through Robert’s hair before taking a hold of it and taking control. Using his grip to guide Robert’s head, to guide his movements as he works on his cock. He begins to moan in the way Robert knows he’s getting close and he pulls back. “Sorry, Mr. Sugden, but you can’t come yet.” Robert says. He pulls back as he stands and then slowly straddles Aaron. “Not until you fuck my brains out.” He says as he lines Aaron cock up with his hole and slowly lowers onto it. He feels the slight sting as the head penetrates and then exquisite sensation when he feels him sliding in. Robert throws his head back closing his eyes. “Fuck.” He says as he begins to slowly ride Aaron. Aaron sits up and begins placing kisses to Robert’s chest as he thrusts into him, slowly at first, meeting Robert’s own movements and speeding up after a while. He’s licking and biting at Robert’s nipple when he begins to slow down, Robert nearly whimpers in response but quickly changes tune when in one quick movement Aaron is on his feet holding him up. Robert quickly wraps his long legs around Aaron’s waist while Aaron wraps his arms around Robert’s back to hold him up. He quickly picks his pace back up again, thrusting harder and faster with every moan coming from Robert. He’s glad that Liv knew well enough to sleep over at Victoria’s for the night as he’s not sure that even the sound proofing would muffle out the noises coming from Robert.

As Aaron thrusts into him, Robert moans into Aaron’s mouth as their tongues meet and fight for dominance. He hasn’t even touched himself, but he can feel the precum as it smears across both his and Aaron’s stomachs and he can feel himself getting closer. Again, he whimpers as Aaron slows his thrust only this time he pulls out and as he slowly turns facing the bed, he throws Robert down onto it. Robert’s not quite sure what’s gotten into Aaron, why he’s being so dominant, but he likes it…not just likes it, he loves it. Aaron looks down at him for a moment then leans down and flips him over. “Get on your knees.” He tells him, without hesitation Robert props himself up on all fours his back arched and arse up. Aaron runs his fingers down Robert’s spine stopping at the small of his back before slapping a palm across one of his cheeks. “God. I love your arse, Robert. I fucking love it, you know that.” He says, not really a question, just a bold statement. “So, you going to fuck me or what?” Robert asks breathlessly. “Beg for it.” Aaron demands. “Aaron, please.” Robert’s practically whimpering. “Please what?” Aaron looks him straight in the eyes as Robert looks back over his shoulder. “Aaron, please fuck me. I need you in me.” Aaron smiles and pushes back in all in one swift thrust, Robert letting out a guttural moan. “Fuuuuuuuuck!” He groans out. “Harder, Aaron.” He begs as Aaron thrusts back in. “Harder.” Again he begs, and Aaron leans down so his chest is pressed against Robert’s back, he leans forward and presses his lips to Robert’s ear. “I love it when you beg.” Aaron whispers into his ears in that raspy voice that sends shivers down Robert’s spine. “Aaron, please. Fuck me harder.” Robert begs, and Aaron complies. He begins to thrust in harder, faster, and whispering obscenities into Robert’s ear. He reaches around Robert’s side and takes a hold of his cock, starts stroking him. “Fuck, Aaron. I’m going to come.” Robert says trying to catch his breath. “Aaron…Fuck, I’m coming, I’m coming. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck.” He says taking in a deep breath, his body nearly collapsing in ecstasy.

“You are so beautiful.” Aaron whispers into Robert’s ear as he begins to tense. “I’m going to come.” He says. “Come inside me.” Robert says as Aaron’s thrusts become erratic. “I’m coming, Robert. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” He says as he feels his toes curl, and his load shooting into Robert. With every stream he feels shoot out he buries himself further into Roberts back, biting into his shoulder. Once he feels spent they collapse into a pile of limbs on the bed, tangled into each other. “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted this for the last several weeks.” Aaron tells him. “See…I knew you were treating me like I was fragile.” Robert nudges at Aaron’s side. “So sorry I didn’t want to further injure my beautiful husband.” Aaron teases back. He leans over and places a kiss to Robert’s lips. “I can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together.” Aaron tells him. “Neither can I, Mr. Sugden. Neither can I.”

 

 

**EPILOGUE**

It’s a soft touch to his lips that slowly brings him out of his sleep. A soft, tender, warm feeling that spreads across him because of it. As his eyes slowly flutter open he sees the same beautiful ocean blue eyes he gets to wake up to every morning and still to this day he wonders what he did to deserve this. “Morning, beautiful.” He hears the low raspy voice say to him. Aaron’s on his side, his head resting on his hand as he looks into Robert’s eyes. “I would have taken him, but you know how stubborn he is.” Aaron says nodding his head to Loki who’s dancing about their bedroom door. “He wouldn’t go with me, he’s that stubborn.” Robert laughs looking over at his dire wolf, as he refers to him. If he was in love with him as a puppy he’s more head over heels for him now that he’s a 34-kilogram beast. “Hold on buddy.” Robert says as he kicks the duvet off himself, getting up and heading to the window. “Yeah, it’s looking pretty rough out there. Can’t remember the last time it snowed that bad.” Aaron calls out from bed. “I’m sure Loki will love it out there…let me run him out real quick and we can get breakfast started when I get back. Yeah?” He asks, Aaron nods and waves him away. “Just hurry, we need to get everything ready for later.” He tells Robert.

It’s only 30 minutes later that Robert walks back through the door, half frozen from the cold outside, he’s blowing into his hand as he walks in, Loki barging ahead and running around the laughter that’s filling the family room. Robert’s grinning from ear to ear the moment he hears the laughter. “Dad.” He hears the squeals of a small girl as she wraps her arms around his leg. He looks down and pulls her up into his arms. “How’s my little princess doing?” He asks her as he gently throws her into the air, her giggles filling the air. He stares into her ocean blue eyes, the same ocean blue eyes she got from her father, the same black curls adorning her head. As she comes back down to his hands he recalls the day she came, the day she arrived. He’d been a nervous wreck the week leading up to the birth, no matter how calm Aaron had been, he couldn’t keep the nerves from wreaking havoc with his emotions. Even after everything they had been through after all the counseling he’d received, the memory of Jack still made him doubt himself. Still made him feel like he couldn’t be a good father, regardless of how much he wanted this, how much he wanted it with Aaron. “Robert, you’re not him. You’re nothing like him. I wish you could see yourself through my eyes and see how amazing you are. You’re going to be amazing, I know it.” Aaron had told him. Little by little Robert became more sure of himself thanks to Aaron, but the moment he received the call from Nicki. “My water just broke.” He’d gone into full panic mode, luckily for him he’d been with Chas when it happened. “Take it easy, luv. You just try and keep calm. Breathe, breathe, breathe. Now get in and call Aaron, I’ll drive.” During the drive she talked him down, talked to him in a way that reminded him of his mother, Sarah. “Robert, you’re being too hard on yourself, as per. You’re not your dad, Robert. You are a good man, a great man and if you ever have any doubts about it, just look at the man Aaron has become. You did that, you made him a better man just as he did for you. You will be a brilliant dad, you both will be brilliant dads.” Chas said beaming with pride. She had been nearly more excited about becoming a grandmother than both of them about being fathers.

“Dad…it’s not fair, I want a turn!” The shout snaps him out of his thoughts, as Robert looks down at his boy. “Rob, you mind paying attention to your son as well.” Aaron calls out from the kitchen, winking an eye at him. “Put Ryan down and give Danny a turn.” He tells him. “Why put Ryan down when I can just take them both at the same time, aaaaaaah.” He jokes as he reaches down and picks Danny up with his free hand. Danny, the spitting image of Aaron, same eyes and same hair just like Ryan. He pulls them both in and hugs them tightly. “I love my two little monsters.” He says, beaming a smile. “Come on kiddos, we need to get you ready, nana Chas will be here shortly to help us get ready for the party tonight. “I’ll take them.” Liv chimes in as she comes walking down the stairs. Both Aaron and Robert looking at her with pride, she may have had a troubled youth, but she had grown into someone they couldn’t stop bragging about. She was in town from Uni for Christmas and she wanted to make the most of her time there. Just like Chas, just like everyone else in the family, she loved the twins Ryan and Danny, to her they were like her little brother and sister. She couldn’t get enough of them.

Once Liv had taken the twins upstairs to get them ready, Robert finally had some alone time with Aaron. He joined him in the kitchen, walked up to him pinning him against the counter holding him by the hips. He placed a kiss to his lips and leaned his forehead to Aaron’s. “The twins will keep her busy for a while, you wanna have some fun in the mean time?” He whispered into Aaron’s ear. The words sending shivers down his spine the moment he hears them. After all this time, after all these years, Robert still has the same effect on him he always had. “Mum will be here in about 20 minutes.” Aaron replies. “Good, hopefully she remembers to knock this time.” Robert jokes back and Aaron laughs in return. “Come on then Mr. Sugden. What are we waiting for?” Aaron says as he takes Robert’s hand and leads him towards the guest room. They may be getting an early start on the fun times tonight, but it’s Christmas Eve and there’s still plenty of fun to be had. Plenty of family to surround them, plenty of love to go around, and plenty of years to come.

 

 

 

 


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